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mmcool
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20 Aug 2012, 8:56 pm

this is a vary simple gide for dealing with ASD'S


tip 1
try not to plan your day
tip 2
keep on telling yourself your normal
tip 3
look in people's eyes
tip 4
find a way to less your time on a special interest
my way is to run and wonder about
tip 5
dress in top label cloths as that will make you seem to be better to fit in

I hope you like this tip gide



lostgirl1986
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20 Aug 2012, 8:58 pm

Pretty good tips. I'd definitely add to try to add emotion when talking to people so you don't come off as too monotone or at lease smile at people when they approach you.



CrystalStars
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20 Aug 2012, 9:06 pm

Although I appreciate the thought behind this thread, it really isn't as simple as that.


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20 Aug 2012, 9:30 pm

CrystalStars wrote:
Although I appreciate the thought behind this thread, it really isn't as simple as that.


Agreed.

Tip one would only drive me nuts, slowly until I had a sudden meltdown due to uncertainty.

I cant tell myself im normal, its not enough really to think that to be or act normal it just makes me self concious

I look into eyes =terror=social mishap

special interest=passion-passion=long, hard boring, day

I cant afford top labels, nor would I care for them wal mart has nice cotton clothing i can wear and afford AND like.



UDAspie13
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20 Aug 2012, 9:41 pm

Eye contact = only because my mom gets on to me if I don't. Physically uncomfortable.
'In' clothes = uncomfortable and revealing.
I never plan because I'm not a ritual aspie I'm a 'hopelessly disorganized' aspie. Although uncertainty does drive me up the wall and telling me something I've been looking forward to isn't going to happen is never good. I usually break down in tears.



lostgirl1986
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20 Aug 2012, 9:43 pm

CrystalStars wrote:
Although I appreciate the thought behind this thread, it really isn't as simple as that.


I think that the tips are good but I agree that it's not as easy as it sounds.



Delphiki
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20 Aug 2012, 10:40 pm

mmcool wrote:
this is a vary simple gide for dealing with ASD'S


tip 1
try not to plan your day
tip 2
keep on telling yourself your normal
tip 3
look in people's eyes
tip 4
find a way to less your time on a special interest
my way is to run and wonder about
tip 5
dress in top label cloths as that will make you seem to be better to fit in

I hope you like this tip gide

1.Wrong- If I don't plan out my day I don't get anything done (I jsut make a basic plan, not a rigid routine)
2.Wrong- I am happy with who I am
3. Okay...
4.Wrong- Why should I not do things I like to do?
5.I am not going to buy expensive clothing just to try to fit in. If people do not appreciate me when I wear the clothes I like then why should I care waht they think?


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again_with_this
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20 Aug 2012, 11:08 pm

Is this a guide to make AS easier, or to fake being NT? Or are you saying faking being NT will make AS easier?

mmcool wrote:
tip 2
keep on telling yourself you're normal


I can't get behind this one. It seems too self-delusional, like playing wish-away.



yellowtamarin
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20 Aug 2012, 11:20 pm

again_with_this wrote:
Is this a guide to make AS easier, or to fake being NT? Or are you saying faking being NT will make AS easier?

A professor at my university thought this. I was studying the differences in presentation of autistic traits between males and females, and when I brought up the theory of females being better at "acting", he basically said well then they are not diagnosable as having AS...if they can appear to be less impaired, then they are less impaired.



hyperlexian
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20 Aug 2012, 11:28 pm

yellowtamarin wrote:
again_with_this wrote:
Is this a guide to make AS easier, or to fake being NT? Or are you saying faking being NT will make AS easier?

A professor at my university thought this. I was studying the differences in presentation of autistic traits between males and females, and when I brought up the theory of females being better at "acting", he basically said well then they are not diagnosable as having AS...if they can appear to be less impaired, then they are less impaired.

that's an interesting point. many NTs are just acting, after all, aren't they?

i don't act like anything on purpose, yet nobody thought there was anything diagnosably off-kilter until i had an employer ask what was "wrong" with me. i was in my mid-thirties. so i wonder, is it acting or something else?


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one-A-N
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20 Aug 2012, 11:31 pm

yellowtamarin wrote:
again_with_this wrote:
Is this a guide to make AS easier, or to fake being NT? Or are you saying faking being NT will make AS easier?

A professor at my university thought this. I was studying the differences in presentation of autistic traits between males and females, and when I brought up the theory of females being better at "acting", he basically said well then they are not diagnosable as having AS...if they can appear to be less impaired, then they are less impaired.


I would give your professor an F. He doesn't understand the basic concept of "hidden disability".

An Aspie might successfully fake being an NT all day at work, and then go home and spend hours alone in the evening just recovering from the huge drain they feel. That is basically my life.



CockneyRebel
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20 Aug 2012, 11:31 pm

That's good advice for some members. I prefer do do things my way, though.


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again_with_this
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20 Aug 2012, 11:36 pm

hyperlexian wrote:
i don't act like anything on purpose, yet nobody thought there was anything diagnosably off-kilter until i had an employer ask what was "wrong" with me. i was in my mid-thirties. so i wonder, is it acting or something else?


I'm curious, what did the employer think was wrong with you? Do you think others may have noticed, but just didn't say anything until then?

And if you didn't even realize anything was wrong, why would use your employer's opinion to seek a diagnosis?



hyperlexian
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21 Aug 2012, 12:04 am

again_with_this wrote:
hyperlexian wrote:
i don't act like anything on purpose, yet nobody thought there was anything diagnosably off-kilter until i had an employer ask what was "wrong" with me. i was in my mid-thirties. so i wonder, is it acting or something else?


I'm curious, what did the employer think was wrong with you? Do you think others may have noticed, but just didn't say anything until then?

And if you didn't even realize anything was wrong, why would use your employer's opinion to seek a diagnosis?

you missed a word: "diagnosably" off-kilter.

i realised something was wrong, and my husband knew i had a disability, but he suspected it was related to family issues. even my students pointed out my lack of eye contact. i have had 30 jobs in 25 years and could not keep friends, so my problems were fairly evident.

but my problems didn't have a label according to a counsellor who saw me for an hour at a time once a week. but she wasn't qualified to do a diagnosis. it wasn't until i was referred to a psychiatrist that someone finally suspected i have a developmental disability of some kind. and finally i had a formal diagnosis after that.

Asperger's wasn't in the DSM until the early 1990s, and since i didn't suffer intellectually there wasn't a label in existence that fit my troubles at an earlier date.


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Teredia
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21 Aug 2012, 1:23 am

Tip 1 - Dont plan your day. Even NT's plan their days. Just not as strictly routines as Aspies.
I have a farely lax routine. its flexable, buuut if theres a major shift like something that will make me super later for class or something i will avoid it like the plague. otherwise, eye contact and dress sesnse are two very good tips. Also another tip, try not to melt down around new people if theyve done something to trigure one, just make up a polite excuse "im sorry I dont mean to be rude, but i forgot something and i really need to go grab it." for example.
(i learnt this the hard way trust me, i know its not easy).



Rattus
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21 Aug 2012, 2:21 am

I tried this for most of my childhood, teens and early twenties, I also spent it truly believing that suicide was the only way out of this endless hell. I like what I do now better.