Getting Blanked when talking about Special Interest

Post Reply New Topic

Why is it that when I mention something that interests me, I get blanked. This happened with two of my friends the other day. It's like my enthusiasm is an embarrassment. On each occasion, my friend said absolutely nothing, waited a few moments and changed the subject. I don't get it . . . can't they say something? "That's nice," "Interesting," but no, just blank. It's not like I'm always interested in what they have to say, but I say something encouraging anyway. I don't understand it.

And what would this interest be?

Squidoo . . . It's a site that helps you to create web pages. You write about topics that interest you.

I'm learning about HTML and CSS coding to create better pages.

I know it's not the most exciting thing in the world. It would even be better if they had told me they thought it was stupid, but no response at all just makes me wonder what's wrong with me.

I see.

Well different people like different things.

Apparently AS interests are monotonous, stereotypical and unusual. And AS people are different from NT people in this way.
It's just not as important to them as it is to you, and NT people react to such topics of conversation in a different way than you would do. I would find that rude, though. But in a casual atmosphere I guess no-one can help it.

You probably bored them, and do not recognize the signs of boredom in their facial expression, body language and other non-verbal cues - other people might see these signs.

There are plenty of people who are interested in the same things. The Computers and Science forum here is one place with plenty of CSS, HTML and coding threads.

I'm not sure if there is something they wanted to say, but didn't for some reason. Or if they just care so little they can't be bothered to say anything. The latter I think is rude, too.

Thanks I'll check it out.

i do not consider my interests to be "special". i am interested in everything that i am curious about. when i am talking to someone about something that i have thought about previously, and if they do not express a desire for me to desist with my narrative, i will talk for a long time about a very small field of ideas. i bore most people i talk to.

example:

my girlfriend rang me tonight and when i asked her what she was doing, she said that she was waiting for her father to make a lead to join her DVD player to her TV in her bedroom.
i gave deference to her contribution by replying that it should take no more than 10 minutes, and then she can lay in bed and watch her favourite movies.

i then added the fact that i do not like movies and went into painful detail as to why, and i then started talking about how i should switch my foxtel boxes in my house so that the master box is in the bedroom and the simple box is in the wow room (the room with my computers and sound system and the big TV).
when the TV is on in the "wow" room (always), i pay almost no attention to it because my computer monitor is closer to my head, and i am more interested in my games than the TV, and i have no idea what is on the TV but it is at least a voice in the background. it is strangely comforting.

in the light of what i have just said, i will say further that my recorded programs (only possible on the master box) are of no interest to me when i am out of bed and in my main room, and they are only available to me in my main room where there is too many distractions to allow me to pay attention to the recorded programs.

when i am trying to lay in bed late on sunday mornings, i get bored because there is just rubbish on the secondary box when i switch it on, and i wish i had the master box in the bedroom so i could watch without distraction, the shows i chose to record.

i got about 1/4 of that description across to tammy, and she was not interested in the slightest, but she listened because she felt she had to. if i had asked her what i said after i said it, i am sure she would not be able to provide a transcript.

everyone is on a boat alone in an ocean, but they eventually coagulate and gravitate into swirls of social convection, but my boat is land locked and i am bound with rigid and concrete observations.

over and out

Last edited by b9 on 25 Aug 2012, 10:00 am, edited 1 time in total.

People blank me when I happen to bring up my obsession, even if it's relavent to the conversation, and even if they don't know that it's an obsession because I don't generally talk about it to anyone. And my obsession is buses in a pareticular bus company, so it's not like an unusual topic.

True; interests are interests - everyone has them.

It's so irritating. It must be something to do with presentation.

old people with alzheimers disease do not have a rich mental environment to enjoy.

my interests are peculiar to my curiosities, and my curiosities will wane with time i am sure.
but until then i will be always the same.

Similar experiences happen to most people on the spectrum when attempting to communicate about their interests. It might have little to do with how you mentioned it, I can tell you as someone who has thought a lot about this (or maybe someone who has especially boring interests to everyone else) that most Neurotypicals expect to move onto new subjects of conversation quite rapidly and they might not feel they have done much wrong by moving on to another subject right away, without really giving any response to what you have said.

This happens to me sometimes too. Quite often I will mention some random factoid which I have accumulated and, unless I am with a particular kind of group, they will totally blank me like you have said or perhaps look at me with a different expression to usual (I couldn't really tell you exactly what expression - suffice to say it means they're not interested) and say something like "oh. right. that's interesting".

I pretty much assume that *nobody* is interested in hearing these things unless I know them and I am sure that they are or they have specifically indicated that they want to e.g. the topic has come up in conversation and somebody has asked a specific question. Unfortunately on most days if I am with a group of new people then I wont feel comfortable talking about much else other than things I know well/am interested in which can mean that the choice is: (a) risk saying something which will make people react strangely toward me or (b) say nothing and come across all weird, intense and creepy. Not a great choice, lol :/

I am well aware that by default, nobody is interested in/cares about what I have to say (if they did, they'd ask). I likewise couldn't care less about what I have to say, hence why I don't say anything at all (aside from those I know who share my interests - I try not to even say anything here, since I know you guys don't want to hear it ). Interesting thing is, they don't seem to comprehend that I am not interested in their constant Twilight spiel or who's playing in the Super Bowl. I guess it's OK for them to consume my time with their meaningless drivel...

BTW: I am also aware that this reply comes off as douchey.

Last edited by CyborgUprising on 25 Aug 2012, 2:02 pm, edited 1 time in total.