Needing to Check

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I seem to have an issue every since I became a teen or even before that where I feel like I need to second guess and check my actions, words, approaches ALOT. I even remembering telling the psych that diagnosed me, that I always felt like I needed to get permission before I did anything. Or else, I was going to go out and make a mistake. It gets tiring a lot because I sit back and I have to think very carefully about my actions before executing something even if its something small. Like at work, I had to approach some packers in the warehouse of inventorying there tools. I was looking constantly to see if the situation was right, there not too busy, there in the right location, and thinking back a lot. I feel like if I just act, then Im going to go and mess something up.

I'm like that as well. I always look up to others to make sure I'm doing whatever I'm doing properly. I always need reassurance as well and if I do something wrong I get really tough on myself.

I feel like that too, mostly from being afraid of humiliation, and I seem to get embarrassed easily. Like today I was at an animal show with my family, and my cousin was holding a giant lizard thing (can't remember exactly what it was called), and I wanted to stroke it but was afraid the lady at the stall might say ''oh no, don't touch him there, he doesn't like that, he only prefers to be stroked here...'' So I waited for someone else to stroke it before I could stroke it, just to make sure.

I feel like I don't feel free to do anything. I remember as a child I was always afraid to play on something that nobody else was playing on. Like once I was in a hospital waiting-room, and there was a rocking horse, and I really wanted to go on it but was afraid to, because there wasn't anyone else even near it and I was worried about being told off in front of everybody. Then one kid climbed on to it and I saw a member of staff there smile at them, which gave me the impression that kids were allowed on it, so after this kid finished on it, I felt more free to play on it.

I don't know if it comes from extreme shyness or being too timid, or what.

I have a compulsion to check and re-check my work to the point that many of my assignments were late in elementary and high school. Turns out I have OCD... In university, I quickly had to learn to get over it.

Last edited by CyborgUprising on 27 Aug 2012, 4:48 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I do all those things also things like locking a door I always have to double check, if I dont I wont stop thinking about it for hours.

I wasn't sure if that was covered by the OPs question but seeing as at least one other person thinks it was then I will go with that I suffer this problem terribly. I am totally obsessive about locking doors. I will lock the door, be perfectly aware of the fact that I have locked it and yet still question it and walk back from the door of the car to the door of the house to check it is locked again. Even then I am repeating to myself "the door is locked, the door is locked" in my mind to cement the idea there so I don't start freaking out about it again 5 minutes into the journey. When I am getting out of the car, even though the car has central locking, I check that all the doors have been properly locked.

Edit: Also if I am taking a flight and I need my passport I will obsessively check the bag I have put the passport in even though I *know* I always put it in a place that ensures it cannot fall out and cannot be stolen unless someone gets the bag off me (not likely).

Now that I think back to the title of my post, yes it does come off as a very OCDish thing. No thats not what I meant but its ok. I meant checking socially, like getting approval from others. Speaking of OCD, yes I do when I leave my house feel like I need to check to make sure I have all the essentials 2-3x mainly cause my dad freaks out whenever I forget the smallest thing. And I also forget small things a lot, like cell phone, keys, lunch, wallet, etc.