How could people/aspies be so financially irrational?

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My ex replied to my email (rarely doing so, somehow assuming I'm the plague and must be totally shunned or something, just because we happened to break up)... saying that he's "f****d financially"... I was merely requesting that he'd pay his fair share of the food he ate when living here, which we were supposed to split... before leaving he seemed to have found financial independence, but two years later he'd even use such an extreme word as 'f****d'... just before he left, in an attempt to dissuade him, I actually mentioned money... but no use. The only thing I care to spend any money on, besides the necessities, is anime figurines, and I haven't even cared about that for a bit now since for most I'd need to be awake to get it from the postman, so a bit of a hassle... point is, I'm not sure how one can be 'f****d', especially with no dependents (heck, I paid for all his food and even then I had an excess... and I barely ever check the amount, so I'm not exactly obsessed with micromanaging my finances or anything).

To say the least, though, money doesn't exactly solve all problems... I can't buy love, or even any kind of company (well, if I was in London e.g. I could pay for escorts, which would temporarily solve my problem with loneliness, but the reason I never bothered anyway, even if I could theoretically travel two hours each way just so I could spend a single hour with some random stranger is because... well, it's useless unless I lived around the corner, and even then... I just can't buy love). I even offered my ex just before leaving £500 (400 more than escorts take) for at least one more time in bed together... but somehow an ex must have the plague and absolutely cannot be approached, or something... I just miss the warmth, but somehow the prospect of money has no effect on certain individuals... which is fine, I suppose, as love itself has no relation to mere numbers. He accepted me once without caring about a bank balance, and left similarly. I've just been alone ever since, though... must be how pensioners feel, especially when it's at that age when their partners simply die of old age. Age, though, is also irrelevant when it comes to loneliness... I got a cat, but unlike in anime, they can't talk, so it's just one way...

Poor executive functioning for financial planning and budgeting combined with impulsive spending and abuse of credit are all common traits of Aspies. That's how.

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No for supporting trump. Because doing so is deplorable.

I am quite the opposite of it. I am said to be very good at financial planning and budgetting. I also have a bookkeeping system over my own money, cash money in my wallet, money on my bank account and creditcard debts (which are very low, easy to solv by moving money to it, or absent).

I write down the tiniest expenses. When I go to a Coca cola machine, buy a can of cola which is often one euro, I write it in my system. I can immediately see what money is left.

I use a very big Excel table.

Each month there is a fair amount of money left after paying the rent for my appartment and other expenses. That makes me able to afford travels abroad, mosty once a year. I also buy computer, music and photo equipments.

Your title of this thread is an inappropriate over-generalisation. You seem to have a lot of issues. Don't take them and the exasperation they seem to cause you out on us. I am an Aspergers woman now of senior age, started with nothing, planned carefully, invested my savings prudently, only took calculated risks after a lot of research, brought up my children, financed myself through university, always lived within my means, never borrowed money from banks nor friends except for mortgages, which I repaid without ever missing a payment, and now in retirement I am financially ok, so perhaps you could explain how I am 'so financially irrational', because I can't see it... Perhaps you wrote the title in a completely thoughtless self-absorbed way, or did you intentionally create it to offend people here?

I'll paraphrase it to:
How This OP Can Be So Irrationally Insulting

B19, I only meant to refer to my ex, who seemed to be stereotypically aspie, don't know many others, so can't comment on anyone else... I did include 'people' too, but I suppose I could remove what's after the slash if only I could edit it...

I don't really know.
I don't really budget my day-to-day finances, but i rarely spend money if i don't have to; i don't need "luxeries".
i never go to movies, wear off-brand clothes, eat the C-brand foods from the supermarket...
This way, i know i always have money in case i find an unplanned expence, and i do calculate and budget non-emergency large purchases (like my car, or the new computer which i still didn't buy since i don't "need" it).

Probarbly a lack of foresight, not realising that one should always have a medium-sized emergency fund.
I place 15% of my income directly on that fund, and any excess on the end of the month goes into the "fun fund", which by now is bigger than the emergency one, while neither has been used yet

Sounds like the guy was trying to guilt you over the breaking up to be honest....like make you feel bad for contributing to their financial troubles via breaking up. I mean if all you expected was him to help pay for food and he couldn't even do that and now claims to be 'f***d' financially all because you guys broke up it just sounds like guilt tripping. I couldn't say if your ex has aspergers or not.

I personally have some trouble budgeting, but I could do a lot worse...I manage to get by ok each month more or less, sometimes less but I have a fixed disability income so cant expect too much from it.

Mootoo,

It is not your fault that your ex is "finally f****d". The title has been throwing people off in this thread. I think anyone has an ability to manage their finances. I was offended by the title of this thread and posts that said Aspies are impulsive with their money. I think a anyone neurotypical or not can be an impulsive spender. To get back to what I was saying, the title should have been different to your thread so it does not come across as blaming a group of people or groups of people. Just be careful in your wording, but I got your point. Otherwise, you did your fair share of the finances with your ex already.

I'm sort of in a similar situation, i'm currently unemployed on benefits, I have a gambling problem (though it could be impulsive spending), spend most money on games, sometimes skip going out to eat just to save money only to spend it on lottery, gambling sites, or games (micro-transactions). I sometimes get so frustrated or stressed I don't care if I spend all of it at once. I still have an overdraft to pay off (it's free atm as long as my bank thinks im still at university as it is a student account). E.g. I get £117 ($180) every 2 weeks, and spend £80 per week, atm i'm in a safety net by family paying rent, accommodation, necessities and occasionally treats or improvements like furniture in their hope that I will pay them back someday.

I don't have to budget as I have this safety net but when the family isn't around to help me out, I will likely be homeless, no food, no understanding or concept of money. Damage has been done, can't get out of this one.

@Mootoo,

If he is an Aspie, he might be saying that he's financially f*^&ed because he is frightened of losing his money due to his lack of social skills (finding another job, keeping a current one, etc). I notice this with myself. I always hoard my money because I know what it is like to be in place of destitution and have struggles greatly in my past. Now, I am doing fine but the thought sticks with me. Also, they fact that I am only suited for a certain kind of job makes me even more nervous and conservative with my money. Therefore, he could just be lying because he is afraid to part with it.

On another note, I can't believe you offered him money to sleep with you, but since I have been lonely in the past I am not one to judge. I would say just to be more respecting of yourself next time because you are handing over your precious money to someone that no longer wants to spend time with you or give you affection. And, love cannot be bought no matter what anyone tells you.

If you do not want to fight with him continuously over the money and can do without it- I say, let it go and you have learned your lesson for the future. You could take him to court if you wish, but you are not likely to win because judges do not care to sort out money problems within a domestic partnership. Next time you live with someone, ask them to pay up front or no food for them.

Hope this helps.