I don't like having people watch me work

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kittymom
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16 Mar 2005, 1:44 am

Is this an Aspie thing or is it just me?

I find it difficult to work where people can see me. Even at home, I can never get any work around the house done unless I tell hubby/kids to stay upstairs if I am downstairs and downstairs if I am upstairs or doing anything is very stressful. They don't always comply (except my daughter, who is Aspie, she's always very meticulous about following rules), because it makes no sense to them so they don't value my request, and are always forgetting, and that just makes it worse, because there's always the possibility that they might come unexpectedly. If they don't come, I'm perpetually obsessing that they might and don't get a lot done, and if they do, well, then that's it, might as well quit, and then I have a hard time trying to do anything with them in the house for a long time.



Pugly
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16 Mar 2005, 2:37 am

I am not completely the same way. But if I am doing something that is very personal to me, or something I would have a hard time explaining it to people, it's difficult doing it around others. But if it's just "work" work, and I don't have any attachment towards what I am doing I don't have a problem.

If someone is exculsively watching me I can become extremely self conscious about what I am doing. And mess up, and overthink. But if they are just in the room and I know they aren't paying attention to me it's not an issue



Noetic
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16 Mar 2005, 6:17 am

Pugly wrote:
I am not completely the same way. But if I am doing something that is very personal to me, or something I would have a hard time explaining it to people, it's difficult doing it around others. But if it's just "work" work, and I don't have any attachment towards what I am doing I don't have a problem.

Wow I am spot-on the same!

If I care about or value what I am doing, then I can't focus on it unless I know nobody is watching or listening - if anyone is there, I get so distracted because they will be looking and wanting to know what I am doing etc. I can't focus on what I am doing (incl. emotionally) if I have to keep thinking of explanations or prepare to talk someone or display emotion (like facial expressions when opening a present etc.).

I often can't even open letters (if I know it is something I care about, not just bils) when someone is around and need to lock myself in the loo to open them!



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16 Mar 2005, 7:41 am

I don't mind doing mindless work in front of other people, like sewing, once my patterns are all laid out.

I can't do work that requires thought with other people around, because I get very distracted, though. I have read something about aspies being able to be aware of either their own conciousness or another person's conciousness, but not both at the same time (which is what NTs do, apparently). I think that may have something to do with it, because I find I become so concerned about what that person is doing or thinking I can't come back to myself and work. I just want them to leave me alone!



synchro
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16 Mar 2005, 2:43 pm

I have problems working while others watch, especially if the watcher is someone in authority such as a supervisor or manager.

This is one of those life long problems for me. Most recently I experienced this problem when I was attempting to become a PC repairman. A friend of mine set me up with several clients, whom I would visit at their homes to affect repairs. Simply having the person in the same room with me distracted me to the point where I could not think clearly. If the customer was watching over my shoulder and questioning me, my thoughts would come to a complete halt. Needless to say, I was an utter failure at this type of work. I had intended on starting a home PC repair business, but soon realized that working in customer’s homes severely impaired my abilities.

This problem affects me in numerous ways. I’ve been playing guitar for twenty-one years and have never been able to play in front of others.



Tim_p
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16 Mar 2005, 3:18 pm

I have alot of trouble with being watched (or feeling that I'm being watched) too. A little while ago I was given two IQ tests sequentially, on the second test the man who administered it seemed to watch me more closely, I was so stressed by it that I scored nearly forty points lower on the second test than on the first. Many of the questions I know I could've answered I froze up on and had to skip.



ghotistix
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16 Mar 2005, 3:24 pm

I find it hard to work on anything creative around other people, but just plain work doesn't give me any trouble.

synchro wrote:
Simply having the person in the same room with me distracted me to the point where I could not think clearly. If the customer was watching over my shoulder and questioning me, my thoughts would come to a complete halt. Needless to say, I was an utter failure at this type of work. I had intended on starting a home PC repair business, but soon realized that working in customer’s homes severely impaired my abilities.

In my work, I'm constantly fixing computers with people in the room asking questions, and it usually doesn't bother me. But if I'm doing something that takes a lot of independent thought, stick a fork in me, I'm done.



Rekkr
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16 Mar 2005, 3:50 pm

I am the same way. If someone looks at me and we are not involved in conversation or some similar activity, I freak out. In order for me to accomplish the most work, I must be alone or in an area where people can't see me.



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16 Mar 2005, 4:41 pm

I guess it depends on what type of work I'm doing. If I'm doing something that I know how to do, then I don't care if people are watching me or not. If I'm doing something I don't know how to do, or something that I'm under pressure to finish quickly, then I am unable to concentrate on what I am doing if someone is watching me.