Hahaha!
Sorry, I think it's half her, not just you being Aspie.
If you give someone an item because you're not using it any more and it's not a big ticket item, then you shouldn't have an issue with what they do. That's sort of dipping your hands into their business and actually disrespectful, in my eyes.
Now, maybe she did intend on making it easier for you to take, but she also didn't have the right to be offended once it was out of her hands, especially since you tried to give it to charity.
I say "burn baby burn!"