your thoughts on ASD and boundaries

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I'm wondering if what I went through is a typical Aspie trait: having no mental/social filter that tells me what is appropriate to say. Some other ways to word it: having a porous filter or boundary. Or a vague, nebulous boundary.

Comparing my situation to a hypothetical average "healthy" NT, I can see that their boundaries help to block or delay (pause and analyze) words that are coming in, helping them to figure out an appropriate response. For me, when I was at my worst - late teens into late 20s or early 30s- words, information, threats, ideas, anything/ everything would come straight in and my reaction would be straight back out. No filter or boundary to mediate in either direction.

I can say that I have issues with this as well! I am never quite sure what is appropriate conversation for any given setting, at any given time.

I have said things other people have said but the difference is they know when to say it and when not to say it. I don't. I have gotten better at it though and that didn't start until I was in my mid twenties. I just always have to think now because it doesn't come natural. My husband still tells me "Don't tell them that." I still say things that are "honest" because I said something lot of people wouldn't say or I said something that implied something else and I didn't mean that. Sometimes I know I am being inappropriate but I say it anyway because I can't always help myself. I get an urge to say it so I do without being strong. But I don't blame that part on my AS because I know what I am saying is wrong.

Without the nt social module in my head, there is no reason to filter what I say.

I don't have aspergers (just some of the traits) and this is one of them. I mostly go out in public with my parents and that's the only time when I talk. But if I do go out by myself I never talk to anyone except to say thanks or hi after they say "have a nice day or "hi" to me first. (extremely introvert). I consider this extreme introversion kind of a good thing because since I don't talk I never run the risk of unintentionally offending someone

That's good presence of mind. You're staying within yourself and your limitations. I was an extreme introvert who never wanted be that way and couldn't just accept it.


Ok thanks. Very similar to my situation. Have gotten slowly better with responding more appropriately. But I have to make an effort to stay aware or could go back to just blurting things out.

Sounds like mental or social boundary problems could be fairly typical for AS.

For me its usualy the case that i want to talk freely, but ppl seem to start polite and then build up rapport till they become best buds and can talk about anything.
I want to skip straight to the best buds stage by talking freely to start with - some ppl respond well to that, and some dont