Maladaptive daydreaming

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Y'all heard of this?

It's where you daydream incessantly; it's a bit like an addiction in that it is impulsive and, (this is extremely unscientific) makes you feel good.

The issue here is if anyone has ever had this. I "have", I think, but the problem is I can't always tell WHEN I slip into these daydreams.

On a more personal level, it would appear as if these are spurred on by what I wish to be- fantasizing instead of doing.

Thoughts!

I've heard of this and believe it describes me well. I spend the majority of my waking hours daydreaming. I feel like I live a double life: one in the physical world and one in the world I've created in my mind. I daydream about being friends with my favorite fictional characters, and when I'm the only one awake at night, I talk to them. They're essentially my imaginary friends, and I love them all so much that they are like a second family to me. They feel real to me; almost like spirits whose presence I can sense.

The only thing I disagree with about maladaptive daydreaming is that it's frequently spoken of in a negative manner; like an addiction that needs to be overcome. I don't believe that my daydreaming is harmful to my psyche. In fact, one mental health professional I spoke to said that if it wasn't for my daydreaming, then the psychological damage I suffered from years of being bullied would have been a lot worse than what it was.

When I was a child/teenager I would regularly shut myself up in my room and go into imaginary lives. I'd lie on my bed, close my eyes, and just imagine different lives. Most of the imaginings were about being a valued member of a group or to have friends.

I still do it on occasion now, but I'd say less than once a month, and only for a few moments when I'm going to sleep at night.

I am in my early 50s and have had an active daydream life all my life. I do not find it maladaptive. It provides a harmless and de-stressing distraction and escape. Because of my Asperger's I had few friends growing up, and none since becoming an adult, so there are no real people for me to hang out with. My daydreams consist of a number of story universes that I have created over the many years of my life. Some have fallen by the wayside, others are occasional, or poorly formed, still others are main ones. I sometimes use the daydream stories to help me figure out how to deal with things, by having the characters go through similar things, and trying out different scenarios to resolve the problems. And besides that, they are like TV shows that I control, and allow me to hang out with the characters. They are not real, but it does provide comfort to me to be able to "play" with my story lines whenever and where ever I want. My daydream story universes provide me with a pseudo companionship, as I am not able to maintain real ones.

As a child I spent all day in the fantasy world in my head, with Chuck Norris.

Now I'm slightly verbal with people I spend a little less time in my head, but it still happens. I now try and turn that world in my head into works of fiction.

I prefer the term fixed fantasy though, and the day dreaming is more vivid than just thinking up thoughts. It has a certain time period, location, landscape, characters, continuing storyline etc. And is the best remedy for a sleepless night.

Sure, I probably spend more time there than in reality. And it beats reality by a mile. (Though mine aren't as cool as including Chuck Norris; that would be awesome.)

As far as being "maladaptive"... I'd expect that to be normal view, but I think there's a reason why the human brain does it. I'd bet a lot of prisoners do it to keep from going nuts or getting overly depressed.

Every so often, I'll wake up and I'll be stuck in this dream that continues to become a daydream and it will stick with me for sometimes hours! It is quite enjoyable, and I make no efforts to stop it. They are usually always about what my life would be like if I had an endless supply of money.

I joined the forum just now, wanting to discuss this topic, and I find a thread already started.

My son, who is 25, fits the pattern described as Maladaptive Daydreaming, and he also fits Fantasy Prone Personality as described on Wikipedia. (Of course that makes me feel guilty for having been the sort of mother who made stuffed animals talk, but the other two kids grew out of it and I can't help it, I'm a writer and poet.)

My son has also been assessed as Aspergers or HFA several times, but always with qualifications. Right now, we're dealing with a sort of crisis because I felt I had to hospitalize him a few weeks ago, due to apparent delusional paranoia. It's not clear that it's real delusions or real paranoia. We know he has a sleep disorder, and we know he has LD patterns consistent with NVLD or AS. But we're not sure what is happening now, and I have to make difficult decisions about what to try to force him to do. (which is almost impossible, of course)

Dan believes that he is an empath who can sense energy patterns in people. I know sane, non-autistic people who say the same things, and in fact I've shown some of them his informal writings about it, and they say he's exactly correct. They see the very same things in the same ways, he's not off on his own track there.

But it goes further. He also believes he is helping fight a spiritual battle, with the assistance of angels. It is starkly real to him. He spends a lot of time praying. He says that he no longer believes he has HFA, he believes he has just always been different due to this spiritual battle. This is why he can't be around people: because he can't bear the overwhelming weight of sensing people's energy fields and their role in the spiritual battle. The unfortunate problem is that he can't bear to be around someone in our household, and believes this family member is bad. That's some of what precipitated the hospitalization crisis.

The hospital wasn't helpful in working out a solution. They tried one med that he didn't feel helped, and sent him home. A tdoc said that Dan has no signs of schizophrenia in his face and eyes. He felt the problem was mainly isolation. We let the med go by the wayside for now.

Today Dan was upset for a while about a visitor's bad energy vibe, feeling he needed to protect me. He didn't confront the visitor, but he tried to persuade me that it was dangerous. So I'm having to evaluate this all over again.

Some of the problem is clearly that he has a seriously fantasy-prone personality; that's always been true. Some of the problem may indeed be empath ability, but confused by not being able to see normal things. It's like he's blind to the obvious and sees only whatever is uselessly obscure. He tends to think that people are making sexual advances when they aren't, and he thinks they are depressed or anxious when they are exhibiting normal reactions. He can't tell what is normal. He gets agitated because he really believes that something bad is happening, and he can't be reassured by my words, since he feels that I am blind to the truth.

Friends and family are concerned that the real problem is psychosis. I need to explore to what extent autistic blind spots, imagination and emotional struggles could account for what we're seeing. I really don't know what to do.

Any thoughts?

Masoala - If the psych hospital won't keep your son, you should at least take him to see a therapist and perhaps a psychiatrist (psych med doctor) too. I'm no professional, but it sounds like he is indeed experiencing either schizophrenia or psychosis.

I totally agree. They call it "maladaptive daydreaming", I call it "finding a happy place". If I don't have any other way to generate positive emotions, I gotta make them on my own. And if I focused on reality, the professionals would say that was bad for focusing on negativity.

I agree with you two. There's probably a good reason that the human brain does it. I'd bet that prisoners and other people trapped in various circumstances do it to keep from going nuts or getting too depressed. I've had a really crappy day today partly because some stuff in reality is destroying an imaginary reality (sort of like the movie "Vanilla Sky"). Sometimes reality sucks and it's nice to have an alternative. I suppose it is possible to go to far, but I don't like the general view that it's a bad thing in any amount.

My maladaptive daydreaming is how I keep from getting insanely lonely, and how I make myself feel understood.
Couldn't live without it.

People I know feature as characters in the daydreaming. Except, they understand me. They like me. They are interested in my interests and in my expertise regarding my interests. They understand my Asperger's.
I know they're not real, and I act it out like a play. I can turn it off - so no, I'm not schizophrenic. My daydreaming characters are just figments of my imagination.

Basically, it's socializing with idealized people in my head. 90% of the day. Since I was 12.

I once condemned myself as egotistical, now, I realize it's a coping mechanism that keeps me sane.
Apple_in_my_Eye mentioned people who are trapped and isolated do it. I guess that means I live a trapped and isolated life, even in the midst of social situations.

If that doesn't make one depressed, then I don't know what will.

I daydream a lot, but usually about the topics that I am interested in, without me being personally involved in the daydreams. I don't know if this is considered daydreaming. I like the feeling of thinking about things and being in my own mind.

I have such mixed feelings. I am too in my 50's & my daydreams have occupied the majority of my life. Great solace in them. Such familiarity they seem like the real home, my real identity. I doubt I would have survived the navy without them. Or a corrosive divorce. Or ... Yet ... yet ... I see the career opportunities neglected, the marriage with children lost, now a life weaving hammocks when perhaps ... perhaps. I'll never know, I still imagine me in some triumphant place that seems unobtainable on earth. Yet am I not the reason these triumphs were not obtained? "What do you want to be when you grow up?" Someone who doesn't grow up. That wish was granted.

I daydream a LOT. And always have. I think it is the main reason that I have very little recollection of my childhood and early adult years. I did not have a traumatic childhood and I was never bullied, but I still remember so little of those years because I spent most of my time in my head. I mostly play out conversations in my mind. It helps me plan what I should say to someone I will be meeting with. In that way, I think it is helpful because it helps me organize my thoughts. But I do think that it is more detrimental than good. I slip into daydreams while I'm talking to people, which makes conversation hard. And too often I'm not present when I really need to be.

i daydream constantly. most of my life has been lived in a fantasy world where i didn't get beat up all the time, i didn't get taunted, and people were happy to have me around and were happy with my skills and abilities

i have been trying to wean myself off my fantasy life for the last 3 years or so

my life is finally going sort of like i'd like it to. i have a wonderful fiance, a job where people like me and value me, and i have been half-assed successful in keeping the people (most ly family) who push my buttons out of my life.