Why do I feel so different from peers my age?

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I am in my 22. I am not at all into partying and the only reason I smoke pot is too relax and calm my mind, I do it alone. I love technology, history, geography, animals, nature, fishing, fighting sports, etc. I have a vivid imagination and I remember very useless things that most forget.

I was never an easily influenced teenager and I was considered an "outcast" because I was not into fads or any other silly nonsense.

I also have a "different" sense of humor. I enjoy watching prank call videos on YouTube for both kicks and because I find it interesting to see how humans act towards each other and how the situation so easily turns threatening and violent.

I laugh at things many consider corny and I thumb my nose at things others consider hilarious.

I also think very much about death and what happens after death. I have hope that there is a place where we go to after life(which for many of us aspies is hell on earth) and I hope I will get to see my family members again.

Maybe we just dont mature as fast or at all.

I mean here soon i hit 29 years old. And i still feeling like around the age of i would say 16 or so. im still stuck there. Its a very odd feeling indeed, seeing other people like go further but you stay behind.

Only i know is that it gets easier as you get older, the worst time being alone is definitely around 18-22 i would say. But its definitely not funny being different. even less if you really want contact with other people.

I think its just important to try all you can to be as happy as you can be, and not try to achieve or do other stuff because that is what is normal or what other people value. Sure other people go and party and drinking, personally ive never cared for it all.

Life after death, who knows, who can say?, it would be nice, do i know if there is no, but personally and sadly i dont believe in it. I kinda lost faith in all that stuff back when i lost my father as a mere child, that stuff kinda ruins the whole thing for me.

Do what you like and dont spend time to think about what you should be doing or what other people think, life is really to short for that. It can actually feel pretty good not having to depend on others or have the addiction to social needs that many people seem to have.

Its funny to read on the internet that some people are totally lost, because they have to spend a weekend at home, with no friend, no drinking, then their entire world falls apart.

It feels good to be able to rest and be satified in your own presence alone, it might not be a strenght in modern society, but no doubt that it would have been in the past. Imagine people today how quickly they would got nuts if they were left alone for say just 1 year or 2 years most people would loose their sanity. So it definitely has it downsides being so socially dependent.

I don't know if I can give advice, but I can still relate.

I especially relate with this line:

Well, my interests are hard to match up with other peoples. I like Pokemon and other random stuff like I love artificial intelligence, and I spend so much time thinking about philosophical topics. Other kids talk about the most simple stuff that I can only find them boring And I totally don't mean to sound arrogant. They just like different things. I'm sure there are more people like me out there, but finding them is tough. I have been a lonely person for a long time now. But I still have hope that I'll meet just one person that I will be able to form a truly deep connection with.

I could see myself being like you in 3 years when I'll be your age. I'm pretty much the same way! (Though I'm against recreational drug use for myself and avoid anything violent.)

Why your interests seem different? I would say that AS definitely has a role in how you think. I hear that many with an ASD remember trivial facts, so do I, and really, it's something I think is amazing. Of course, when it comes to fitting in to a society that's often inclusive as long as conformity is in full effect, people like us are outcast. To our minds, things like fads and the "latest fashions" are pretty insignificant when it comes to the grand scheme of our minds. I also always hear things like how Autism is Greek (or Latin) for "self"-ism, this would suggest why we tend to be more introverted, though it's the social comprehension that may cause this to happen.

A part of this "selfism" may also contribute to our need for spirituality, eventually, when you think this much about philosophy, the question ends up running through your mind, wondering what really happens after death. For me, I've found my spirituality as something individualized and don't affiliate myself with any organized system religion. This has also caused me to stop eating meat, find a new purpose and perspective in art, and do other things. Personally, I believe that spirituality really is something for the one person to follow and not really meant to be the same as someone else's, as encouraged by most systems of religion.

So yes, I understand how you do feel different from others your age. I mean, the average 19 year old doesn't think of these kinds of things nor do they care about it. In fact, most people in general could care less about the spectrum of topics that we can discuss on a philosophical level, but it's the case, we can't change neurotypicals, but we can learn to at least accept ourselves and at least find our own Hell on earth as a reason for helping others.

Or maybe I'm just an idealist. :p