"Possible Aspergers" diagnosis

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Hi. I'm new to WrongPlanet.
My wife brought up the possibility of Aspergers to me 2 months ago. After I read some things about it I realized it just fit. I scheduled testing and finally got the results today. He said "Possible Aspergers." That doesn't help much at all. He refused to look at the anxiety and social problems in the light of Aspergers. I had major problem transitioning from elementary school to secondary school. I couldn't keep up and was constantly getting lost. I couldn't even find my own locker at times. The IQ results showed that I had very slow processing speeds. I realize now that I should maybe have found a specialist and had my testing done there. This is very frustrating for my wife as well. We work together in our own business and she constantly has to spell out every. small. step. of a task.
I wanted to have my diagnosis before I joined WrongPlanet. I didn't want to play games, but here I am. With a possible Aspergers diagnosis.

Diagnosis or not, if the coping methods that you find her helps, it doesn't matter what it is called.
Apparently it is a general problem that non-experts will not recognize AS, especially not in grown ups (and women).

Welcome to WP, there are lots and lots of helpful tips and trixs.

Don't worry, we have mountains of unsure diagnosis people here - Hell, if you look in the parents forum you'll see bashing of professionals all over the place xD

welcome to wrong planet.

lots of us here have anxiety and social concerns. It's hard for the pros to see it sometimes in adults but I think there is a difference when AS is involved.

At least with AS on the table you can read the books and chat here and figure out your patterns of strengths and weaknesses - once you have that you're well in your way to understanding yourself.

<--- Well on the way to understanding himself, too.

What an unhelpful diagnosis. Refusing to consider social problems in light of AS, while saying possible AS? This person has thinking problems.

Pissible Asprger's, now that is something new.

Hi Samian (or anyone who agrees with Samian), not wanting to divert the topic too much, but I saw this and wondered what was meant by it? I'm curious to know how you would differentiate something like AS social/anxiety issues from NT social/anxiety issues. It's always good to get opinions from the *real* experts and general literature isn't helping me understand the internal mechanisms of AS thinking/being very much. Thanks!

Also, BigDavid, I think you'll get a lot more from WP than from your useless sounding diagnosis. I have and I barely make it onto the spectrum radar as far as clinical literature is concerned even though I identify strongly with many many AS traits.

Hi Fili - I wish I had a concise answer for you - I feel social anxiety is different with AS involved but it's not easy to say how.

I asked my psycologist what the difference is between AS and SA in an adult and she said " the expectation is lower" which I found deeply offensive at the time but on reflection kind of makes sense.

on reflection I'm assuming that she meant "the expectation for recovery and treatment through therapy and CBT and whatever else she has in her magic box is lower"

She also said in a different session that she thought I would always have a degree of trouble with anxiety and I would have to learn ways to cope with that. yeah.

In my own experience social for me is complicated by not just the anxiety but also I feel a lower degree of social reasoning in general and lower understanding of social situations. The processing just isn't there. Fast moving social situations are tough for me. Processing emotion - mine and others is often faulty and dangerous so I've learned not to respond to it. I simply need time to figure it out.

Having said all that I'm making some progress and I can cut myself some slack when it all gets too hard.

does that fit with your experience ?

Hi Samian, thanks for answering! The sounds offensive out of context to me too, but in context I guess it could have any number of meanings. I certainly do relate to feeling pretty impervious to therapy so far. I've only recently started for the first time, and we haven't touched on much yet, but I know that I have a logical rational behind pretty much everything that is a source of anxiety for me so I'm expecting to be impervious to any attempts to sort it out by discussing feelings. Will aim to keep an open mind though, I might be surprised!



This is interesting and no I can't entirely relate. As far as I can see, I understand social stuff perfectly well and only get confused by some fairly small aspects. However, I still often find the parts I think I understand really difficult to do or fit in with. So I'm reaching the conclusion that either I'm sufficiently NT and understand everything, but I'm just too no-nonsense and disinterested to play along a lot of the time, or I understand so little that I'm even completely oblivious to the fact that there's anything to be understood. I find myself devoid of thoughts or experiential reference points quite a lot, almost as though I just never paid attention though I think I always am paying attention.

For example, you mention processing the emotion of yourself and others. I struggle to think that I've come across much emotion to be processed in a typical social situation. When I'm at the pub with a load of people from work, I find it mostly awkward, pointless and never-ending. I don't feel particularly happy/excited/warm etc. nor do I feel overtly anxious, but I know I have something of a nervous energy about me and I will find a safe corner to nurse a drink and not move all evening if I can. But I think I feel fine (albeit bored) about that, although maybe I'm wrong.

I also people watch from my corner all evening and I see everything going on (though I follow nearly nothing of the conversation), but in spite of that, I see only superficial happiness and chattiness and good-time-iness, nothing that I would interpret as a genuine or strong emotion on the whole. I find it hard to imagine anyone getting emotional about socialising. If you haven't already guessed, I'm wondering if alexithymia is a more significant issue for me, but there again, I don't score all that high on the alexithymia tests I've tried and it just doesn't really ring true to me in many other ways either. This doesn't sounds like NT social anxiety does it, but I'm not sure it sounds like AS social anxiety either.

In combination with your signature, that made me giggle...

Good luck with the therapy - you might be surprised what comes out of it!

One of the things my psycologist recommended was to have more one on one social outings - she said they can build friendship more productively.

I don't think there's much going on at the pub thats worth worrying about. If it's not fun you can always leave early. Sitting in the corner is a protective thing that you're doing to minimise the stimulation - some people like the stimulation - that's why they're at the pub.

The thing with social anxiety is that you can tell yourself you don't have it that bad and everything is OK but if you watch for the signs as I've done you might find it's there a lot of the time. For me the early sign is muscle tension. Also negative thoughts prior to the event.

Ooh, I feel really bad for commandeering someone else's thread (sorry everyone)... but all the same:

So, um, where do you find people willing to do social outings? Hopefully not at the pub...



See, I keep thinking I have no sensory issues because on the whole I really don't (apart from the odd bit of hyposensitivity). And I really don't understand or relate to the way everything here is discussed in terms of 'stimulation levels', I just don't think I define stimulation in that way. Is this a way to interpret experiences that diagnosed people learn or am I missing something big? I really feel that not having sensory issues is the primary reason I'm so sub-clinical. I have many traits, but seem to have escaped some of the worst bits.



Oh yes, tension headaches! Although possibly also dehydration. But surely social anxiety isn't really a problem unless you're having panic attacks or giving yourself chest pains and palpitations? It should be easy to spot if it's worth considering a problem. No?

first of all welcome to wrong planet mate

I basically spend 2 weeks intensively researching AS and other spectrum conditions and diagnosed myself with AS, ADHD and OCD.. i went to a specialist and he confirmed my own suspicions. Not everyone is interested in psychology like me so i wouldnt expect everyone to be able to do this but how i diagnosed myself was by watching every video on youtube of Aspies speaking about their condition/life... reading heaps of articles and definitions, reading posts on this site and watching documentary films and so on and so forth..

I dont have much to go on here but i suspect your doctor is at fault or that he thinks he is doing you a favor by putting you in the maybe pile?

You know yourself better than anyone, arm yourself with the knowledge

I didn't get evaluated until I was 40. I was afraid of being looked at by a psychologist because I knew there was something wrong with me, but did not know what. I did not want them to lock me up and throw away the key. LoL. It was not until I saw an episode of the Doctors and they talked about the autism spectrum. When they mentioned Aspergers it was like they were talking about me. My parents even said they thought everything they said was pertaining to me. When I got evaluated the psychologist said he thought I had it from the first conversation we had.

My Aspergers has cost me jobs because of how hard it is for me to adapt to new jobs. I was laid off from my last job because all the metal polishing jobs I did for them dried up. I could not use the machines they worked with so they had no choice but to lay me off from a job I held for nine years. I have not been able to land a job since. I never have been able to get a job through an interview. Not one of the jobs I ever had I either got through a friend or by accident.