The "Flap" about "Stimming"

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In the past, I recall discussing the term "stimming" in a thread about the subject. Some, like me, didn't care for the word, although not everyone was equally bothered by it.

I've been thinking about this today. I wonder, since nobody in that thread came up with a term everyone liked, if we should revisit this topic. Has anyone thought of anything they prefer that others might be more comfortable with?

In my own thinking, it occurred to me to get a bit political about it. Flapping and rocking are the stims most commonly cited when speaking of autism. Lots of folks on the spectrum do those things. I don't do much rocking, but I've come to realize I have my own modified ways of essentially doing different kinds of flaps. I read an "Autism Speaking Day" blog post all about different ways of flapping. It was called, "There's a Flap for That". I wonder if it might be neat to challenge stigma about flapping by calling all stims "flaps". Would that be better or worse? Hey, what if you could refer to your favorite stims as your "most rockin' flaps"?

Opinions? Ideas? I'm curious what everybody thinks at this point.

To be honest I don't really see the problem with the word "stimming"; it's short for "self stimulatory behaviour" an entirely accurate and scientific term that aptly describes what we're doing, what is it about the word that you don't like?

I'm not bothered by the word. I am however bothered by people's reaction to it. So what if I rock or twist my fingers in knots. It's not bothering anyone, so why do people tell us to stop? So we look "normal"? Screw that. I rock because it calms me, makes me not feel as stressed.

I'm not really bothered, and flap is a really unpleasant word for me.

However, I do understand what you mean. I think there's a tendency for words linked to autism to gain negative connotations, and that stimming is one of those words.

Steriotypy is another word for stim.

I have a question is this stimming. I haven't been diagnosed yet, but I do thing I think are stimming. I tap my feet, I spin pens between my fingers, I throw things in the air and spin then, I spin in place a lot, I use to rock back and forth a lot. Whenever I catch eye contact with somebody and I'm sitting I can't stop myself from tapping my fingers. Yea

I simply refuse to refer to stimming as flapping. Flapping is a type of stimming, not the other way around. I really don't care what connotation(s) it has attached to it (positive or negative). Stimming is the term used for stereotypy in autism. So, those are the only two terms I will use when speaking of the general stim/stereotypy. Also, it was not my intention to come off as rude, offensive, or whatever. Just a pet peeve of mine.

I appreciate everyone's honest responses. Perhaps different people are posting this time, or perhaps some folks have made their peace with the term. I don't think anyone should run away from terms because of stigma if they don't have to, and that's why I refuse to give up certain terms without a fight. I guess the term "self stimulation" sounds to me like it means something more, um, private, shall we say? Many years ago, when I was in a sex ed class, that term, or a term similar to it, was used with that other meaning. Here, on WP, it seemed a lot of people were uncomfortable with the term in another thread, so I knew I wasn't the only one to feel uneasy for some reason. I have to admit that, somehow, steriotypy doesn't make me feel any better. It sounds too much like stereotype, which also has bad connotations. Oh, well. My idea fell flat. But I can live with the term "stimming" after all, I guess. Having taken more time to think this over, I don't even think that for myself using "flap" would work, for the very reason someone cited here. I was considering that it could, because it would be a self-chosen word, but I'm not convinced anymore.

I'm now starting to realize it might be the stigma, more than the word itself, that's bothering me. I'm still finding the adjustment of being relatively recently diagnosed somewhat challenging. I was embarrassed the other day, at the doctor's office, concerning some of my issues. I think I might need to switch doctors, if I can, to see one where I see my therapist. I'm tired of worrying that anything I reveal about myself might be seen as a deliberate attempt to put on an unnecessary display. I would normally have fought to educate a doctor in the past (being out as gay and facing some stuff with that). But I just feel tired sometimes these days. Maybe I just want a doctor who knows what's going on and isn't going to be weird about it.

I feel really bummed right now...

I'm happy overall with the word stimming. I sometimes worry someone who doesn't know about autism might get confused and think that there is some sexual connotation to the word and so think that I am pleasuring myself or something (I'm not lol). I nearly constantly stim (mostly complex full body movements) but I very rarely hand flap.

The author of the book "Aspergirls" -- shame on me for not remembering her name -- doesn't like the word "stimming" either. She calls the behaviors stimming refers to as "soothing".

Stimming means stimulation. Flapping is a specific stimulation, so calling all stimulations a "flap" wouldn't make much sense to me. I dislike the word more than "stim" as well.