Why are NT's sometimes shy or need books on social probs..

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If one of the symptoms of autism or asperger's is not being good socially, then why's it considered normal for some neuraltypicals to be shy, or buy books on How to Make Friends And Influence People?
I don't think being social comes naturally to everybody. I also think it depends on how a person has been brought up or how confident they are.
I think it's more unusual for people to be confident socially.

Because they are people too and do not have a cookiecutter brain. I have noticed social anxiety is very common now, but it seems like it almost reflects the poor scared animal within us all as we express ourselves semi-anonymously in this tech world. Which is why a lot of awareness and comfortability in showing it is apparent irl. Kind of an oxymoron, gaining comfortability within your own anxiety.

Social etiquette is a skill like anything else, I meet a lot of people who could use a dash of charisma in their lives

Yes but Asperger's is considered a major disorder mainly characterised by lack of social skills, but when NT's are shy or awkward it's considered cute.

Autism is a bit more than that.

It involves sensory sensitivities. It also involves social interaction as something which must be "learned consciously," rather than as something which "comes naturally." And it involves things which are more complex that have something to do with the autistic person's neurology.

As for the shy neurotypicals, there are other reasons for their shyness than their lack of ability in social interactions. It's not that it "doesn't come naturally," it's that they are anxious about social interaction, even if it does "come naturally."

And I don't believe autism should be seen in a negative light at all. There are certain advantages, in some cases, to be autistic versus being "neurotypical."

There are autistic people (e.g., Temple Grandin) who can see things, visually, from a viewpoint "neurotypicals" are unable to conceive of. This is why Ms. Grandin was able to invent a more humane way of vaccinating farm animals. She was able to see things from the viewpoint of the animal, rather than merely from the viewpoint of people.

I was watching a video of Temple Grandin and I don't think the same as her, so whatever way if thinking she has isn't shared by me, yet I'm classed as having the same condition and the way she thinks is put down to being autistic.

So NTs needing books on how to be good socially, confident etc, means they aren't learning to be different than they naturally are? I don't have any sensory problems. I don't understand that video showing children being sensory overloaded. The more crowded and noisy a place is the better for me.

There you go....now you know why autism is a Spectrum!

It's more like NT's need these sorts of books to reinforce something which they already possess--yet they don't know that they possess it.

My sensory sensitivities are quite mild. I don't think like Ms. Grandin, either. I'm not a "little professor." Yet I'm autistic, just the same.

Because they are socially ackward or very introverted neurotypicals or they are not NT but have another condition causing it.

Before I knew I was Autistic I read a number of books on How to interview and took a course for introverts. They helped but only partially because my assumptions about myself were only the partial truth.

If they hadn't discovered the difference between cold and flu then they would probably still be saying that a flu is a more extreme cold. I don't like how it's all classed as the same. How can a child characterised as being autistic because they didn't have verbal skills as a child be the same as me who never stopped chattering as a child?

The flu and a cold are two very different things, caused by very diffirent vira. Sometimes, though, symptoms overlap.

Just like autism and other conditions.

I think people who aren't scared to death of a job interview are more unusual than people who are naturally good at that. When I was at school they gave many lessons on how to conduct a job interview, so it isn't a natural skill for anybody. I think the ones who have no fear socially are the ones with an unusual condition.

What some diagnosticians don't take into account is what is actually dominant in a person.

Is the autism dominant, or is the ADHD dominant, say.

In some people, the ADHD might be dominant, though autistic features are present. And vice versa.

It's easy for a diagnostician to screw up in this regard, and incorrectly identify what is emphasized in a person.

I don't have any ADHD.

I was just giving an example.

Co-morbidities, and what is emphasized in the person, should be addressed in any diagnostic assessment.

There are shy, introverted NTs and there are outgoing, extroverted autistic people. You'll find a lot of variance in either group.