Rascal77s wrote:
It's not always what you say, it's how you say it that gets you banned. It's not what I say that I have a problem controlling, it's how I say it. See the difference?
Any act of communication has two participants. The one who transmits and the one who receives. Any lack of consistency between the two can lead to dissonance and misunderstanding. It is flawed to exclusively "blame" the one who transmits.
More often than not, "how" you say it will make perfect sense in your own head, but it is merely interpreted differently. There is only a limited extent to which that can be predicted, and clearly if you could predict a misunderstanding in advance then you wouldn't word things in a way that would cause it... As such, the only rational conclusion to draw when "how" you say it comes across poorly is that a miscommunication has occurred between both parties, and that neither one intended harm by it.
Therefore... when aggro is dished out to the transmitter due to such dissonance, the one "in the wrong" is the one dishing out the aggro... or "punishment" as they like to call that.
In short, and as ironic as it might sound given my previous statement about responsibility... if you get punished for a misunderstanding, the one who punished you is in the wrong, not you for "how" you said it.
(And of course further aggro for disputing the "punishment" just pushes the punisher further into error.)