Please, some experience from working people

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So I'm still studying and never really worked (I'm 19). However, I will finish my Bachelor in July (studying Computer Science) and I'll have to start applying for jobs soon.

To all of you who have a job or at least used to have one: how do you get along?

I'm asking because I feel like I would not make it through a job interview. I am bad at eye contact, smalltalk, reading nonverbal stuff. If there are questions that I didn't prepare for, I'd probably answer too honestly because I wouldn't get the nonverbal expectation.

But even if I managed to get a job, I would probably - depending on my coworkers - get bullied or at least seem very unsocial and weird. I just cannot talk properly to people I don't know. I'd appear cold and very dislikable. And finally, I'm not even sure I would be decent at my job. I find it hard to concentrate and tend to make stupid errors. Plus I need very clear, thorough instructions or I might end up doing something totally different than what my boss actually wants.

You might have noticed that I'm not very optimistic about my future. I don't actually care about success or career or whatever. I just want to earn enough money to live kind of comfortably and do a simple, not too boring job with people that I don't hate. But it seems employers expect people to appear super enthusiastic and confident and that's just not me. I don't even have super good grades or anything that would be convincing. I'm pretty average, and combined with my not too great social appearance I don't feel like I have a chance.

There is, fortunately, a company in my country that employs only autistic people, and it's taking pretty much everyone with no regard to grades or social skills. The problem is, the tasks would be pretty dull and way under my skill level. But, yeah, as an emergency solution, I guess it would work.

I've only really had one job, part time at a library. I suppose it wasn't too bad because I was surrounded by books, but having to help people (especially stupid mean people) made it almost unbearable some days. I had a hard time doing anything at home. I am soooooo glad I quit!
My coworkers weren't too bad, although I was called racist for something I considered practical and I caused some bad drama with this woman who was insulting my mother in front of me because I went to the boss. I'm perfectly fine not dealing with any of that ever again, though with money problems that may not be an option much longer.

You have a degree in something that actually pays.

End of discussion.

The world will be kissing your ass when you get out of school.

So dont worry about it.

I am working as Software Engineer for 4 years.
During technical interviews for IT jobs most important is your knowledge and skills. Interviewers expect that you are stressed so they try to comfort you and usually forgive little bit odd behavior. And for many IT jobs technical interview is the only one you have to pass to get job.
Unfortunately there are some companies that also performs non-technical interviews to check your soft skills (usually drive by HR people). I had only one such interview and I failed completely.
IT attracts many geeks so tolerance for odd behavior is usually higher then for other jobs. If you have good technical skills you will probably manage. So cheer up and enjoy your studies

For job interviews, practice makes perfect! They are difficult, but with training in areas you're weak in, I'm sure that you can overcome any deficits you may have. And typically most interviews ask the exact same questions, so they're not too tough to prepare for if you know how (I totally failed quite a few interviews before I started to get really good at them). As for co-workers, it depends on where you work and who you're working with. I've worked at a few places with total jerks who want nothing more than to make your life miserable. And I've worked at other places where everyone is as nice as can be and treat each other like saints. It just depends on the culture and the individuals. I find that typically larger companies are more apt to have more considerate people there, since they are much less tolerant of disrespect and often have extensive corporate codes and guidelines related to respect.

You shouldn't worry about bullying - a job is very different from school. People can actually get fired for harassing their coworkers.

About the job interview:
* If you can't do eye contact, at least create the illusion of doing it. Let your eyes "slide" across and around the face of the interviewer, so that it would seem that you are looking them in the eyes.
* Your voice will probably drop, so make an effort to speak up. Don't speak too fast.
* Smile - it matters
* If you shake hands - do it firmly. Your hand shouldn't feel like some cold mushy appendage. Apply some pressure... but not too much, of course, that would be rude.
* Don't be afraid to be honest - many employers appreciate that
* Don't show that you aim low - employers will likely interpret that as a lack of motivation


Above all else, convince yourself that you are good at what you do.

Good luck!

I'm more ADHDy so self employment is good for me. Plus if your smart about it you can be paid more than working for an employer.

Its not for everyone though, and in your field, wide experience in a large company may help to further your career.

Once you experience both, you will be better positioned to know which you prefer

I worked as a Software Engineer. Once you get a job you will be fine, the social aspects aren't a big deal and there are plenty of other geeks who, aspie or not, are also not going to win Miss Congeniality. Early on you should get quite specific instructions of what is required. Just don't meltdown/blowup, do your job, and it will work out.

Interviewing is another matter entirely. Practice is key. Go on a bunch of interviews if you can, even though you will hate it. Gather a list of the questions that always come up and overprepare answers for them. Most people giving interviews also suck at it and don't like doing it very much. If you help them get through the 30 minutes you'll help your cause. Also, most places where I worked, we all had veto power. We weren't asked "Do you really like this guy" but instead, "Does he suck so bad you don't want him here?" Instead of trying to impress the hell out of people, just get through it.

I have found interviews to be all over the place in terms of how badly or well they have gone. One appeared to go well but I wasn't offered the job and another appeared to go badly but I was, so you may not actually be able to tell yourself how well you have done. I had one interview with a panel of five people which was basically impossible for me, as I'm unable to keep track of conversations with multiple people.

However, I've learned techniques which help in a one-on-one scenario. If, like many autistic people, you can't talk and make eye contact at the same time, wait for a pause in the conversation, then briefly make contact and smile, then look away again. I can't tell you what a powerful technique this is - it actually completely changed the way other people responded to me when I got the hang of it. Often, AS people come over as cold or aloof because, even though they may be happy, it doesn't show to others on their face. If you learn to give people a nice smile when you meet them as part of your social behaviour, it will make a big difference. You may also be surprised by how much a few smiles in your conversation will negate a lack of eye contact. A lot of what the other person is looking for in eye contact (reassurance that you are attentive and enjoying the conversation, establishing connection, humour) is communicated with a smile. I worked in sales for a while, which is a nightmare for someone with AS, but of all the techniques I learned, this simple one (conversation pause = eye contact + smile) made up 90% of their effectiveness. Of course, this assumes that what you are talking about is appropriate for smiling, and not a news story about a disaster or something! As others have said, considering your field, I also suspect you will be A-OK once you have your job secured. Computer and software specialists aren't known for their social ability!

Alternatively, you could consider self-employment. I'm working on that at the moment, as it's important to me to work in a peaceful environment at home. However, depending on what you're doing, this may need more people skills than an employment position in your field of study.

Good luck!

The work place is different to university. At high school and school there is a social structure between students in place that I never understood and found that I hated dealing with. In the work place, the are much clearer roles and responsibilities.

Most of your contact with others will be transactional (i.e. can you do this piece of work, where is the report etc?) not the relationship building conversions that dominated school. Also unlike school, there is more respect in the work place for privacy. Most people clock in and out and that it. Something in your favour is that your in an industry that is technical and more tolerant of behavior that is less sociable.

Interviews can be difficult. Review your previous experience (like projects in school) and focus on talking about the technical aspects of what you've done and learnt from them. A classic question in interview is to ask "what has been your biggest mistake". When asked this, respond honestly, but quickly say what you've done to learn from it and improve (my answer was that I depend too heavily on emails, and that I forced myself to use the phone more). Another tip I learnt in interview was if offered a drink, accept a glass of water. If you feel uncomfortable at some point due to an issue eye contact, take a sip of the water. In general the small talk at an interview is about the traffic or weather.

Good luck.

Finishing your degree aged 19/20 is impressive. What country do you live in?

I was unemployed for over 4 years, and started to think I was stupid and worthless because of it. I also kept worrying that I might not get on in a job, that I might be misunderstood by the managers, given all the grotty work, be spoken to badly, be badly bullied by my co-workers, be too slow-witted due to unconfidence and object-blindness, and just get took advantage of.

But I have been in a job now for about 3 months, and it is going OK. It is only part-time, but that is what I wanted to begin with. I just do cleaning at a care home, which can be hard work at times but I get it all done. Also my co-workers are all nice to me, they are also descent, ordinary people that are just there for the money like I am, so I don't see any reason for them to start all bullying me.

I didn't like my first day there, though. The building was so huge I felt like I was in a maze, and I wasn't used to anyone's names yet, and someone was showing me what cleaning chemicals and other cleaning necessities I needed for my trolley, I thought, ''oh my God, how will I ever handle this? How would I know what I need each morning, how would I keep up? I can't imagine myself being this self-sufficient.'' Now I feel really confident and I know exactly what I'm doing, to the point where it has become part of my instinct. It only took me about 2 weeks to get settled and confident in knowing what I was doing.

It is easy to worry about working, because I did. Maybe I'm just working somewhere descent with descent people, but I'm sure most workplaces are generally like that. I just avoided places like female fashion shops where you get a group of young girls working there. Again, some might be very nice, but when you get a group of girls around the same age working together, they do tend to get very bitchy. But don't let things like that discourage you - I am just generalising.

Well thanks for all the answers so far. Well I'm a little early indeed, because I skipped a few classes when I was younger. So yes, normally I'd get my Bachelor with 22 or 23, I guess.

As to working independently: First of all, I'm not sure if I'd like it. That sounds like I'd have too much responsibility and too many opportunities to mess up. Also, I wouldn't know how to start something like that - what I'd need to do, what exactly I would offer.... I think I would be better off in a job where somebody tells me exactly what I need to do (or it's pretty much the same everyday).