I need romance advice from the guys and gals.

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I have a nine year old autistic son who will probably develope an interest in girls in a few years. What advice would you give to a 15 year old high school boy who developes a crush on a girl?

Likewise, supose that you had a 15 year old sister on the spectrum. What advice would you give her if she developed a crush?

Wow. Now that's what I call planning ahead! LOL!

Let me let you in on a little secret...shhhhh....you may not have until he is 15. My son had his first crush last year when he was 10.

The kid is clueless. If a girl asked him for a kiss, then he would give one in a heartbeat without understanding the meaning. I have the feeling that a few girls have crushes on him. But, he can not recognize it in a normative way. He is very affectionate around people.

I kind of wonder what is going to happen in high school. Will he ever have a date to a school dance. If he does, will he understand the romantic nature of the situation. The kid probably has above average intelligence. Yet, he is so clueless.

What techniques did you people on the spectrum use to foster romances in high school. I realize that romance in high school is mostly exchanging small gifts and at most holding hands during lunch hour.

I never had any romances, especially not in high school. I was too busy being bullied.

It's possible that your son might never develop a romantic interest. I guess that he won't want to visit the prom anyway.

Just my opinion, of course.

I will have to admit that I am uncertain the degree to which my son understands the romantic implications of his crush, but he definitely had one. She was a nerdy kind of girl who somehow managed to remain popular enough who used to come to his side when kids were picking on him. It helped that the girl is drop-dead-gorgeous in the "you don't know you're beautiful" kind of way. He was very smitten!

That is planning far in advance!

How did we on the spectrum foster romance in high school?
Speaking for myself- I didnt. I understood what romance was. Worshipped a particular girl from afar but couldnt handle the complexities of knowing when girls liked me, and have the nerve to approach them, and so forth.

I didnt take a girl out on a date until I was 21 ( and Im on the high functioning end of the spectrum).

My advice to you?

If you have a boy on the spectrum tell him this: someday in the future an attractive woman at a party may ask you to come home with her to inspect her stereo equipment. Tell him to do as she asks because he will loose his virginity.

If you have a girl on the spectrum tell her NOT to ask men to come home with her to inspect her stereo equipment because that might be taken the wrong way.

Thats about all you can do.

My son is 6, and a good looking boy with a charming smile (I know I am biased) I think it's only a matter of time before girls start to notice him. For him, girls may as well not exist apart from his sister and 2 cousins.

My son is very private, and I think the last thing he wants is relationship advice from Mom. He's expressed annoyance to me about attention he does get from girls, so I think he would come to me with any weighing problems. He has a couple close friends he can talk with too. I guess my advice would be to be available, and a dialog open when the time comes but don't pry. A lot would depend on developmental levels, but my fifteen year old is very much his own young man, even with an ASD.