I may have Asperger's, would like some help figuring it out.

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I've recently been told by my girlfriend of four years that she's long suspected that I have Asperger's, but has never said anything before. Her mother (who has been working with kids with ASD's for about twenty years) thinks that it is highly probable. I was hoping that the community here may be able to help me figure things out. I am considering going to see a doctor about a referral for a diagnosis, but I didn't feel comfortable going through all that just yet.

So here's a brief history of me, to get you started:
I'm 22 years old, just graduated from university with a poor degree in Comuputer science and AI, which was a hellish struggle.
When I was a young kid I saw Educational Psychologists several times, who evaluated that academically, I was about 3 years ahead of my peers, but my social and emotional development was years behind.
I had behavioural problems that led to suspicions of ADHD; though I have calmed down a lot over the years, and am certainly not hyperactive, I still have huge problems with concentration. I am able to focus on something that I enjoy for an almost limitless amount of time, however I have always struggled to concentrate on assigned tasks like schoolwork. I also have a habit of forgetting to do anything that isn't what I happen to want to do at the time. Despite this, I was never diagnosed with ADD, and don't have the restless hyperactivity that comes with ADHD. I also had a lot of problems with writing when I was a kid, my handwriting was terrible, as were my fine artistic skills. My parents recently told me that I was suspected to have dyspraxia, although this was never diagnosed either. My aversion to writing continues to this day, to the extent that will always avoid and delay anything that involves writing, except in cases where I write lists to help organise myself. I don't believe this is dyspraxia related because I am able to perform tasks perfectly normally that a person with dyspraxia would find very difficult, such as typing.

Socially, I flip between extremes. I can be extremely outgoing, and I can imagine that I would appear over energetic at times, however this is usually only in situations where I am in a group of people where nobody knows each other. When I am in casual situations like school / work with people that I know, then I get on ok most of the time, however I have never really managed to succeed in any social group and generally have been a loner, preferring to talk one to one with people. When I feel under pressure for some reason or other, I have a sort of nervous breakdown where I close down completely, and must appear very hostile and defensive. I lose all ability to carry out normal conversation, and generally make any excuse I can to escape the situation. This happens when I'm caught off guard, like bumping into somebody I know that I wasn't expecting to see, or when I'm asked about something I don't feel comfortable about. In conversation, I thrive on healthy debate about interesting topics, but find general chitchat totally unstimulating.

I was told that if I do have some ASD it, is highly likely that it was overlooked because I may be "very high functioning", and able to compensate by training myself to deal with things. Also, I always performed ok in school, although I found school a nightmare, I still got A grades, and came top in my year in maths and physics. I am highly intelligent, and found that I could succeed in school level examinations without actually having to do any real work, so my dysfunctions didn't seem to matter so much to my teachers.

I can't think of anything else right now, but please ask me any questions and I will do my best to answer them.
Cheers
cheers

Hi Audiofly;

I'm by no means an expert, but for what it's worth, I'd reccomend the following:

1) Read the "you might be an aspie if" "sticky" thread.
2) Google Aspergers and read as much as you can.
3) Check the DSM-IV diagnostic criteria, then come back here to see how it relates to you.

I've never been diagnosed, and have no intention of getting one, as to do so could be very limiting with reguards to your future choices in life. EG; security clearances, medical privacy issues, any sensitive carreer choice.

Personally I have no doubt as to my own status by virtue of the mirriad of things I do that are associated with AS: Pacing with my hands behind my back whilst flapping one hand, counting, poor to nonexistant eye contact, 165 IQ that doesn't much corrilate with what one woul expect of such an individual, etc., etc.,.

Good luck.

^^ Yaye, a great welcome to you Audiofly! I was happily diagnosed with High Functioning Autism in February, and believe I may relate to many of the facts that you have stated, certainly that you may break down when meeting unexpectedly an individual that you know. ^^ However, I remain rather worried that my diagnosis is incorrect and I believe the thoughts within my head loop when I consider if I possess an autism spectrum disorder independent of any advice I have been given or advice I find upon the internet and I believe this very much frightens me.
^^ I am very sorry if this is silly of me, however I believe it is best for me to consider High Functioning Autism and other autistic spectrum disorders as a label. ^^ Thus, if you feel you may benefit from a diagnosis if you do possess the happy condition, I believe this to be best that you seek an assessment. ^^ However, if you feel you would be happy without a diagnosis, then I believe this may be best for you not to seek one.
I am very sorry if this was not of help for you.

Tomasu, thanks for the welcome and the advice

NOBS, thanks, I did have a read at that thread, but the impression I got was that it was a long list of things that would affect a few individuals, but were not generally applicable, mostly for humour. It's such a long thread I can't read it all.
I've read everything I can find on google that seems reliable, however the impression I get is that my symptoms present a little differently to a typical Aspergers diagnosis.

regarding DSM-IV criteria

1. Social dysfunctions: all apply to me to some extent, except for eye contact. I'm worse at regulating my own body language, than at reading other people's.
2. Preoccupations of interest certainly applies.
I find a scheduled lifestyle benefits me, but I am unable to apply one to myself, and when unrestricted, have no regularity at all.
I had never thought about repetitive actions before, but I do curl my toes constantly, and used to to click my neck until it became so painful i had to force myself to stop
As to "preoccupation with parts of objects" I fidget with things, but I couldn't tell you to what degree.
3. I'm not sure what "clinically significant" means, but the impact on my life is very severe.
4. No delay in language development - in fact I developed language much faster than normal.
5. Apart from inability to prioritise and otherwise organise my time, and social incompetence, development was normal or better.
6. I am pretty certain I don't meet the criteria for schizophrenia
If I don't have Asperger's, I'm sure I would meet criteria for some other PDD

Having gone through the list point by point, I'm personally feeling a bit more convinced.

I am not sure whether or not I should seek a diagnosis, on one hand I feel it would help me understand myself, and make some sense of the last twenty years, however I'm worried that if I am diagnosed I will use that diagnosis as a crutch and excuse myself instead of trying to get better at things. I'm also alarmed that people may discriminate based on a diagnosis. Is there much cause to worry?

Unfortunately, there are no cut and dried patterns with diagnoses - some employers may discriminate, as may some so-called friends.

All I can say is that I got my current job through an employment agency specifically designed to help people on the autistic spectrum find work, and tomaintain it once they've found it. Without a diagnosis, I firmly believe I'd still be unemployed now, as I struggled unsuccessfully to find a full-time job for nearly ten years after graduating.

The first part of your post reminds me a lot of me step son who has ADHD. His brother however, and I suspect his father have AS, or some form of High Functioning Autism so this may be possible.

I'm wondering if you just focused on the symptoms, and then read anything that you can about what you can do about them rather than focusing on a label. I found that a diagnosis for my son was helpful, but he is young and it opened a lot of doors for me. In your case, think about what a diagnosis would do for you and if it is really necessary. The symptoms are not going to change with a diagnosis, and so what if you read about AS and use those techniques to improve your functioning when you don't really have it. If it helps, that's what is important.

Audiofly;

Insofar as the "YMBAAI" thread; yes, it is intended as humor, however, the thing that makes it so funny is how much of it rings true. I CAN spend a day of "quality time" curled up with a good dictionary, etc., etc., ad nausium.

Personally, I think if you research this your self, you are best quallified to make the assesment, and by research I mean more than a cursory glance at the DSM-IV criteria. I actually didn't believe I "stimed" till my wife pointed out that pacing while I think is just that.

Concerning diagnoses; I can't see the advantage as there is no cure, and you are merely burdening yourself with an official disabillity. As to discrimination, well there are medical privacy laws, but these don't apply in all situations (government, military, transpotation, in this country it could possably preclude gun ownership, etc.)

I don't see any problem with therepy but much of what con be done for you can be done cheaper and better with the aid of a good NT significant other. My wife was who pointed AS out to me, and even before we had heard of it I had tought her to speak "aspie".

I was diagnosed with AS in2007 at age 21, and have some of the same experiences you do. I was not diagnosed before because of my good school performance, too. I found school a nightmare, but my parents still claim that since I got high grades, I was fine.

Here is Simon Baron-Cohen's test. I chuckled when I saw it in my Diagnostician's test stack, because it was obvious he printed it off the web, so it is the real deal.



http://www.rdos.net/eng/Aspie-quiz.php

It seems Sinsboldly and I had the same idea:

http://tests.neurelitism.com/

This is a site maintained by a WP member who I believe goes by Nominalist. As I recall he's a PHd in some form of "head shrinking". It's got some good tests and commentary, probably much of the same a you would get with a professional. Those with DX's could probably elaborate.

I believe there are advantages to getting a diagnosis, but you will need to weigh it out for yourself. For myself, I got:
support group
social skills training
occupational therapy
"brokerage" services for life-management
travel training for the bus system
vocational rehabilitation with job coaching

It just depends on what you need.

Hi, Audiofly. Welcome. I hope you'll feel at home here.

Although I am diagnosed with AS, the doctor and the shrink are not writing it down because they say it will lead to my not being able to get insurance for a year or more because it's a pre-existing condition. That being said, I'm 61 and not in my teens or early adult life at this point and if I were, I think I would want the great help that's out there now! It's awesome to see that there are avenues for assistance for people like us for a boost to "fit in", so to speak. Not that I much care anymore about fitting in, but I think back on the weird looks and headshaking I got as a teen and young adult, and having some help would have been welcome. I hope this helps a bit! There are lots of great minds here to advise you. And Welcome!

Just wanted to say a quick thanks to everyone who's posted here, it's a wonderful reception, and makes me feel very welcome.

I've done a few of the tests that some of you have recommended, and I'm happy to post the results here.

Leif Ekblad's test:

Your Aspie score: 124 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 81 of 200
You are very likely an Aspie

(apparently I have to make a few more posts before i can link to the graph)

Simon Baron-Cohen's test:

Agree: 2,4,5,6,12,16,18,19,22,23,26,33,39,41,42,45,46: 1 point
Disagree: 1,3,8,10,11,14,15,17,25,27,28,29,31,32,36,37,38,40,44,48,50: 1 point
Score: 38

I can see there are a lot of reasons for and against getting a diagnosis, and I'll have to think it over, here in the UK, I think the advantages weigh heavier though, I don't have insurance problems etc.

Thanks for all your help so far, I'll write a longer post when I'm back from my lunch, I'm starving.

If you think you are, then you should hang around and chat on these boards.

Actually that is not Simon Baron Cohen’s test, but rdos’s(Leif Ekblad's). I have done both and would recommend rdos’s as being more comprehensive than Baron Cohen’s much shorter screening test.

Audiofly:
I really would not bother asking us; we do not know you and you have it from someone who knows you and is familiar with ASDs, that an ASD is plausible in your instance. No advice we could give you about whether you personally have an ASD would be as informed as the advice you have already gotten from your girlfriend’s mother.

The best you can get from us, is confirmation that based on the information you have supplied, it’s not implausible that you have an ASD, but you already know someone familiar with these conditions and much more familiar with you than we are, has already concluded as much based on more comprehensive information than could possibly be included in an internet posting.

If you want to know whether or not you have as ASD, you’ll need to seek assessment from an adult ASD assessment specialist. Please avoid seeking assessment from generalists or childhood experts if this is possible in your circumstance, as adult assessment and diagnosis of ASDs requires particular expertise and there is some risk to your well being if you are assessed by someone without this expertise.