I don't understand. An explanation please.

Post Reply New Topic

I don't understand why people feel the need to be nasty to each other.

I honestly do not understand what they get from it.

I can vaguely understand it if someone has just hurt you intentionally...you may think they are a very nasty and horrible person (or at the veyy least that their behaviour is horrible) and you may want to or even say so. A person may even strike back in self defense sometimes, but if I were to go out and be intentionally nasty to someone for no reason it would make me feel sick to my gut.

What do people get from hurting others? Why do they seem to enjoy it so much?

It makes me feel like the human race is suffering from some kind of sickness that I just do not understand.

I certainly do not interact with people smoothly if you know what I mean, but I change a lot. It just is not easy.

Probably because it makes them feel better about themselves; if they can point out the bad things about you and exaggerate and make fun of them, or make you feel bad about them, then they don't have to feel quite so bad off with their own flaws. It's cruel and unfair, but unfortunately, I think that's the way a lot of the human race naturally is; I've found humanity to be an exceptionally selfish breed.

Slightly off topic and on the subject of adaption, evolution does not create adaptations to fit into a specific environment or simply because it needs them...this is a misconception and is a common one. That view of evolution implies intelligent design when evolution is really more random than that.

What happens is a variety of adaptations or variations will occur within a species. Those that are best suited to the environment at the time will flourish and those that are not will die out and will often not be passed on.

However, what works in one environment will not work in another...so if the environment changes then those that once flourished will not (unless they have other variations that help them to compensate or they move on to a different location) and those that once floundered may flourish as a result.

There are no such thing as flaws in the eyes of nature...only organisms and variations within that species that are best suited to different environments.

If you are floundering in a particular environment then it is not because you are flawed. It simply means you have the wrong characters/adaptations to flourish in said environment and need to find or create a different environment that you can flourish in instead.

Will people stop it with the I am flawed garbage. It's man made drivel and is not how nature or the world itself works.

I don't know. I don't have any answer for that at all, and my post doesn't have anything to do with this topic, I just can't find the thread where we were talking about crochet because I want to send you some pictures and also some patterns. If you are interested, we can either PM about it, or even start a crochet and needlework thread in the women's section if you want. Or random, since guys do that sometimes, Rosie Greer in particular (that big huge football player - linebacker I think - did needlepoint because it relaxed him)

I've also seen patterns for something called Medieval Blackwork which is a type of embroidery that looks really interesting. I bookmarked some patterns for later use.

I finished the shawl and it wasn't long enough to suit me and it was the end of the pattern, so I just made up patterns and rows for about another foot and a half. It actually looks great now that it's done. It looks like that second half was a pattern! Too bad I didn't write it down, huh?

OK, I'll hush for now and we can continue this when and where and if you want to.

_________________
I'm giving it another shot. We will see.
My forum is still there and everyone is welcome to come join as well. There is a private women only subforum there if anyone is interested. Also, there is no CAPTCHA.

The link to the forum is http://www.rightplanet.proboards.com

Some folks are just naturally very opinionated and don't mean to fight yet debates tend to get heated. I'm speaking for myself this happens sometimes. Many it's bullheadedness. If i am wrong i have no problem admitting it.
Yet some topics can lead to heated debates, thus people get defensive and fights start sometimes.
Fights may start, however they can always make up.

As for people intentionally hurting others? Are you speaking of school? I went through being bullied from the time i started school.
Usually it was the jocks or popular kids that did that. (in middle school and HS) sometimes it would be kids who seeked to be popular yet didn't fit in the popular crowd.
As for elementary school, some kids may have problems at home, and thus they take it out on peers. I have seen this currently in our neighborhood. One of my friends (9 years old with Aspergers) actually has another friend who has been bullied who admitted to bullying others. And the kids who bully them all come from very broken homes..

I may sound pessimistic, but I believe many people are wanting others to be unhappy for the sake of their own self-esteem/(relative) happiness. They don't openly try to hurt others because that will very likely put them in some kind of trouble. However, when they find an easy target, they will make use of that opportunity.

I don't understand why people do that. I might be mean from time to time but it's either unintentional rudeness or I'm frustrated about something. I never am just mean to be mean.
Another thing along the same vein is why do NTs seem to not be very truthful? Maybe I'm too literal, too precise and they routinely deal in generalities as part of their nature. I just find it frustrating. I understand that sometimes it's in someone's interest to lie about something but sometimes there's no benefit to stretching the truth or telling tales and yet they still do.

Sometimes people gain status in a group by picking on someone else. The ones ganging up on someone together "bond" over it. It isn't just NTs, either: I see that kind of behavior here.

Otherwise, if someone's else's behavior or words triggered some negative association or contradict some ideal, a person might "strike back" even though there was no direct attack against them. I think aspies are probably even more prone to this than NTs, being more likely to assume the other person understands everything the same way.

I associated with a very mean person for quite some time. Once a friend of a friend was there and pinned her down about how outright nasty she was being to everyone.
She answered "I'm miserable and I'm making sure everybody else is miserable too."

I found that quite honest of her. I also quit hanging around as it was obvious she was not trying to change.

I thought it was about the pleasure they get when they know they have power over you.

Some people are nasty as a basic feature of their personality and others become nasty as the world has an impact on them and they become like the people around them

Generally it's a competitive 'I'm better than you' thing though. It's a reinforcement of the social hierarchy; people saying they have a higher place in it than others.

It all depends on how much notice a person wants to give to other peoples' opinions.

I think people with ASD's are very vulnerable though as they are more likely to take the nastiness seriously and they are also more likely to be picked on in the first place.

There's no solution to it as it's human nature.

You have to try and distract your mind from it and see it as something to just be tolerated as if you get too intolerant of it you'll end up doing something stupid and end up in prison or sectioned.

the main thing is not to obsess about it