Autism v Confidence and Self Esteem Issues

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May turn into a rant, sorry!

Just had a meeting at college and the subject of my diagnosis came up. (will explain about that later) It turned into "you don't have Autism, you just need to sort your confidence and self esteem issues out and you'll be fine". I was then told that because I don't have a diagnosis, I have no right to attend a local Autism group. There are some who do attend who aren't diagnosed properly.

With my diagnosis, I saw a GP who agreed that I may have it. (note: he's a trainee and this was the first time he's ever seen me) I was sent to a psychiatrist who agreed. The psychiatrist isn't trained to diagnose adults (no idea why I had to see him then) but said he believes I've got and he can't say anything further. (ie, where I am on the spectrum)

So, is Autism (I am talking about in general; not just HFA and AS) the same as having issues with confidence and self esteem?

Autism leads to social failure and misunderstandings which in turn leads to low self-esteem. There's a correlation, but you'll find many members here who are very fond of themselves and don't try to conceal this sentiment.

This was my understanding, thank you.

There are iisues being relegated to the lowest social status by allistic people who only see themselves as neuroprivileged and this is a fact ot in the lack of confidence on people on the autistic spectrum. Actually in autistic issues specifically Asperger syndrome there are far too many 'misunderstandings' which shows that most people that being allistic people have a lack of empathy autism/Asperger syndrome. Also the double standards because allistic people expectt to have respect bestowed on then without them having to earn this but they would not trat other allistic people that way. This is a crucial factor in the self espteem and confidence issues of people on the autism spectrum. Being deleberately made to feel that you cannot do anything right is anther similar issue and is just plain wrong. This is also a caouse of anxiety issues as well.

There are iisues being relegated to the lowest social status by allistic people who only see themselves as neuroprivileged and this is a fact ot in the lack of confidence on people on the autistic spectrum. Actually in autistic issues specifically Asperger syndrome there are far too many 'misunderstandings' which shows that most people that being allistic people have a lack of empathyof issues in autism/Asperger syndrome. Also the double standards because allistic people expectt to have respect bestowed on then without them having to earn this but they would not trat other allistic people that way. This is a crucial factor in the self espteem and confidence issues of people on the autism spectrum. Being deliberately made to feel that you cannot do anything right is anther similar issue and is just plain wrong. This is also a cause of anxiety issues as well.

I wonder if the person who said what she did to me, even realises that a) Autism is a spectrum disorder and b) I, as a female, apparently, have different traits / present differently than males.

No. Definitely not.



My guess would be "no"...or if she does have a spectrum or set of traits in her mind, that the set of traits is really specific and the spectrum really short.

In one way her comments don't surprise me. I have a fairly rare eye condition. She once claimed I don't have it, it doesn't exist (there's a lot of research going on and there's a charity for it) and that I'm Dyslexic. According to the ed psych who assessed me, me being Dyslexic isn't possible. (my logic is too good or something)

I have been informed by the local Autism charity branch officer that the college is offering a course on Autism in June. It will be interesting to see who runs it. It was suggested that some of us go along and see what they get wrong.

So, it looks like I won't be attending in September. Can't be doing with so-called experts who don't have a clue what they're talking about. Both the psychiatrist and GP said they weren't sure - that was before they really did anything.

No, it's not the same thing.

If it were, it would be called "having issues with confidence and self esteem," and not Autism.

However, having issues with confidence and self esteem are extremely common among those with Autism. There are a lot more diagnostic criteria than those in order to be diagnosed with ASD, though. They can exist in anyone as separate issues and can have nothing to do with ASD whatsoever. When they exist alongside dozens of other ASD symptoms, chances are extremely good they're correlated to one's Autism and aren't just separate issues independent of having Autism.

My support worker (I've only met with her 4 or 5 times) agreed with her. They both now want me to get counselling to deal with my issues. I know I need counselling to deal with my relationship issues; but I am not going for issues which don't exist.

Apparently, I'm lonely. I have no idea where that came from. I attend 3 (was 4) social groups a week, which is enough for me. Unlike some people, I don't need or want to socialise all the time.

Sounds like people are projecting their own mindset onto yours and are unable/refusing to accept that you're different in some ways than they are (i.e. that you need far less socialization than they do, or that you may not express yourself in the same way as others, so it may not be as easy for them to know anything at all about your self-confidence or self esteem). They would be lonely if they socialized only 3 times a week, so they just assume that you must be lonely, too.

I used to get a lot of the same sort of pushy, misguided "support" from people -- I've never even had to say anything to them, they just read things into whatever they know about my life...or maybe they just misread my behavior or non-verbals (not sure). If I spend a lot of time alone, some people assume I'm depressed (really I'm happiest when I'm not pushing myself to be sociable all the time), for example. I've also had people telling me I had self-confidence issues -- and they were so adamant and pushy about it that it eventually made me really, really angry -- I wouldn't have cared if they just had their opinions/ideas about me and left me alone, but if somebody's going to insist on trying to convince me that I feel x,y, or z when I don't (almost every time they see me -- not just every so often), or push me to get help for problems I don't have, that's different; I would argue with people about their misguided ideas, and flat out tell them they were wrong over and over and over. So frustrating.

Her "assessment" of me was based on her claiming that she thinks her dad has it, therefore, because I'm not like him, (I'm female and we're different to males on the spectrum) I can't possibly have it. I was going to point out that ignoring the people who assessed me, 2 others (at least) think I have Autism. One is a close relative who is about to graduate with a degree in psychology and the other is a friend who is on the spectrum and has known me for 10 years. She wasn't there when I had my assessment either.



I've found this. She knows nothing about my life. She then had a go at me because I can't work (I'm not sure my employer would appreciate me just walking about because it's too noisy / there's too much light and I've got sensory overload) and said that I have to work.

I had to laugh last night - I posted a much shorter version of this question on a local Autism charity page. I received a message from the branch officer who asked who this lady is and said that there's an Autism course at the college in June. Would be interesting to see who runs it.