Please tell me who is right in this

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So I am at my dads and my brother and I are playing with these huge pillows called husbands. We are holding them up to our chests and rameing in to each other. But then like 10 times later we bump a picture frame and it falls. Luckily only the hinge snaps so we grab some duct tape an tape it back. Then I hang it up. My brother is laying down and he heaps the tape an wraps it around my leg. Before he can rip it off I step on his upper chest and then run away and gently peel it off only taking off a few hairs. When my dad gets back I tell him everythingand he looks at my brother ( who is fat and pale so he gets red easily) and sees this huge red mark and a two tiny black and blue marks. He then goes crazy saying that I could have broken a rib and pictured his lung (I only stepped on him for less then a second to make him let me go). My dad proceeds to say that I have anger issues and I could be criminally charged. I say that I didn't do it on purpose I was already in pain from the tape being on my leg wrapped tight and I did a normal reflex that anyone would do. You are in pain = you do what ever you have to do to get away. He just won't listen to me. My brother says I was just doing a joke and my dad says you left a mark on him he didn't leave one on you. Yeah because if I hadn't done tha there would be not hair led on that portion of my leg. I am so annoyed can to please tell me in your own opinion who you think is right me or my dad

Unless your brother is a little kid or he has something physically wrong with him where playing rough like that can be harmful, your dad is overreacting. Ya'll were just playing, and that's what boys do. I'd suggest next time going outside if you are going to play like that and it's probably best to not be telling your dad anything about it.

Yeah, I second OliveOilMom. You were the tattletale, so you got what you deserved.

Who was right? Well, there are two different distinct answers to this question, and I shall attempt to supply an answer for both.

From a personal standpoint, I think your Dad is overreacting; you do have a right to defend yourself in this kind of situation. However, it is also likely that your brother was simply playing, and you overreacted.

From a societal standpoint, we have a very strong taboo about using any sort of physical violence or coercion towards anyone considered smaller and physically inferior to us. However, this taboo against violence is a largely one sided affair. For example, there is a reason why the vast majority of domestic violence cases are against men, even though women are the perpetrators around 50% of the time. Society seems to have this idea that, because of their diminutive stature, a woman couldn't possibly injure a man physically. Because of this, men are expected to take nearly any amount of physical abuse without ever retaliating. This idea is even more predominant in the case of children. In this scenario, what you did is not nearly as important as who you did it to, a child. Fair or unfair, if you break the taboo, there will be serious consequences, regardless of circumstance.

Your brother shouldn't have done that to you. You should not stand on someone's chest as that is very dangerous. Although you said it was an accident so that makes it different. Your dad should be more fair.

I think your father mostly wants to stress the importance of not fighting, especially stepping on people's chests, rather than determining who was in the right/wrong. You may have been the initial victim in this case, but injuring another worse than yourself can turn the tables in their favor even if it was an accident.

Leaving any kind of mark on a younger (I'm guessing) sibling always equals getting in big trouble. Sounds like dad is overreacting needless to say, but at least your bro is backing you up. But like I said, leaving any kind of mark usually ends up as getting you in big trouble no matter what.

Well, fighting between brothers, as long as it's a friendly fight, is quite a healthy thing. If you haven't needed a medical kit several times during your childhood, you did something wrong.

That said, stepping over the chest of somebody seems like something that could be actually dangerous. So I would understand that your dad states VERY clearly "Don't do it again, don't. Did you understand?". But talking about anger issues and criminal charges? wtf???

Being a parent does not make you right all the time.... from experience I would say there was over reaction which could have been due to any numbers of stresses completely un related to the said incident...
This stuff happens in all houses where there are siblings... as long as there is no malice I wouldn't worry too much.

Stu

Your brother shouldn't have wrapped the tape around your leg in the first place, joke or not, it was a very needless and could be a very dangerous thing to do. Your dad should have really told your brother off for putting the tape round your leg. Plus it sounds like your brother was being a bit of a crybaby.

This is exactly what my brother does. He deliberately annoys me to a point where I get upset and angry, then if I react in a harsh way, he goes all sensitive and turns into a crybaby, then I get in trouble. Yeah, as if I would be harsh on him if he hadn't of annoyed me in the first place.

Same situation for me, too. My little brothers annoy me to the point I do something bad to them to make them stop, and then they go tell. I hate being the older sibling and getting in trouble for nothing. Even if I was upstairs and they were downstairs, fighting, I'd of course be liable for the outcome somehow. And sometimes I'd be punished for an injury I did not cause. People at school adopted this tactic, but luckily teachers are on my side, and believe me in any situation.


Anyway, nobody was to blame, or both. I think your dad was just being overprotective. Play fights happen.

I'd say you're right and he's overreacting.. However, your best course of action is to just take your lumps and do your time vs contesting your dad. Its not completely logical in the aspie sense, but it is in the social world. If you challenge him he's only likely going to get further pissed off and possibly punish you more for it. If you just bite your tongue and let him have his say and way, it'll all blow over sooner rather than later. You can just know for yourself that he overreacted and you didn't maliciously intentionally hurt anyone, so your conscience is clear and that's all that really matters in the grand scheme of your life.