Need advice from from fellow aspies...
Sorry but this is going to sound crazy but I need help.. I am in between a rock and a hard place with an elephant about to sit on all of it...
Ok, where do I start? I am 40 years old... and until a couple years ago when my life fell apart completely I finally realized I was an undiagnosed aspie. Since learning about asperger's I have realized how it accounts for all the craziness I didn't understand about myself and my life.
For the past several years I have been living with my mom.. who is crazy and a control freak. Because of my asperger's i fell through the education system and never found my calling in life and would drift around from job to job always looking for something special I knew I was supposed to do. Sculpting has always been something I was decent at but it is not something easy to learn and it's expensive and time consuming.
Living with mom I was finally in a position where I had time but not much money or resources. And then out of the blue something hit that sidetracked me from that... the past few years I have been studying some very strange subject matter... you can read about it here...
http://www.wrongplanet.net/postt214447.html
It sounds crazy but I have discovered something that will change the world.. I am in the process of trying to document it myself but it is not easy.. especially being an aspie and always hating writing. I just had to build msyelf a PC to do the graphic work for a book and am teaching myself how to illustrate it.. I have some drawing ability but I am out of practice. This story is also incredibly complex and a minefield legally.
But the issue I have now is that I have a month or 2 to get my act together and make some money... if I don't my mom is retiring and moving out across ountry. Now here is the issue... my mom is a controlling b***h.. and she is forcing me to move against my will. She has said I don't have a choice in the matter. Now you have to know the back story to this to understand it fully but she was the one that moved me here to this state when I was young.. away from all my family and with that and my asperger syndrome I never got to know any of my family... and met as*holes for friends when I was growing up so I really have no one to turn to.
So now I either need to finish a portion of this story to sell as a book or I need to find some kind of job I can do to survive....
But the problem is I can't function in any kind of job. I wish I could get some kind of help to do this project but no one takes me seriously because of my asperger's and no history to show that what I have discovered is for real...
To complicate things I have 2 cats who I have to think about too.. they are like my kids and getting older and would die if I wasn't around. I don't want to make them move across country following my crazy mom either. I am worried they may not even make the trip physically either.
This probably won't make any sense to anyone but I am giving it a shot here..
What did you discover?
_________________
One Day At A Time.
His first book: http://www.amazon.com/Wetland-Other-Sto ... B00E0NVTL2
His second book: https://www.amazon.com/COMMONER-VAGABON ... oks&sr=1-2
His blog: http://seattlewordsmith.wordpress.com/
I can't give that information out here.. it's complex why but when I put the info out it has to be in a way that will make a big impact. It sounds crazy but if I don't people could prevent this from getting heard. So a slow leak would be very bad.. I need to make a big splash all at once.
I tried giving this info to someone in a position to make it public but no one would let me get my foot in the door.. it;s a long story to make people understand the importance of this. This is why I am forced to document it in a interesting way to get people's attention.
But to me this is the most important thing I have seen in my entire life... it's difficult to explain that to people without giving them the full story.. but that is the honest truth.
My mom believes a lot of this because I have told her all about it.. she is in denial about some aspects because of the incredible nature of it, but I think she is afraid of me putting this info out because of the possible repercussions.
[img][800:1000]http://wallcapture.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/Free-Question-Mark-Wallpaper-HD.jpg[/img]
_________________
One Day At A Time.
His first book: http://www.amazon.com/Wetland-Other-Sto ... B00E0NVTL2
His second book: https://www.amazon.com/COMMONER-VAGABON ... oks&sr=1-2
His blog: http://seattlewordsmith.wordpress.com/
OK, truth time mate.
You are sounding a little crazy and a little weird (to me) and as for the why, it's because you are going on and on and on about how important and amazing etc your idea is but refusing to give any details and also bringing in litle hints of magical thinking which go against rationality (ie. fact). At best it irritates rationalists such as myself as, for all that you post, I have heard nothing to suggest that it is slightly credible. My hunch is that your idea is going to subject to rudicule because it fails to stand up to scientific rigour (ie. easily disprovable). If this is not the case then please share and allow people to judge for themselves - allowances will be made for aspie communication issues of course
Good luck and I genuinly hope to be proven wrong as that would be incredibly exciting.
_________________
AQ46, EQ9, FQ20, SQ50
RAADS-R: 181 (Language: 9, Social: 97, Sensory/Motor: 37, Interests: 36)
Aspie Quiz: AS129, NT80
Alexithymia: 137
whirlingmind
Veteran
Joined: 25 Oct 2007
Age: 57
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,130
Location: 3rd rock from the sun
Ok, where do I start? I am 40 years old... and until a couple years ago when my life fell apart completely I finally realized I was an undiagnosed aspie. Since learning about asperger's I have realized how it accounts for all the craziness I didn't understand about myself and my life.
For the past several years I have been living with my mom.. who is crazy and a control freak. Because of my asperger's i fell through the education system and never found my calling in life and would drift around from job to job always looking for something special I knew I was supposed to do. Sculpting has always been something I was decent at but it is not something easy to learn and it's expensive and time consuming.
Living with mom I was finally in a position where I had time but not much money or resources. And then out of the blue something hit that sidetracked me from that... the past few years I have been studying some very strange subject matter... you can read about it here...
http://www.wrongplanet.net/postt214447.html
It sounds crazy but I have discovered something that will change the world.. I am in the process of trying to document it myself but it is not easy.. especially being an aspie and always hating writing. I just had to build msyelf a PC to do the graphic work for a book and am teaching myself how to illustrate it.. I have some drawing ability but I am out of practice. This story is also incredibly complex and a minefield legally.
But the issue I have now is that I have a month or 2 to get my act together and make some money... if I don't my mom is retiring and moving out across ountry. Now here is the issue... my mom is a controlling b***h.. and she is forcing me to move against my will. She has said I don't have a choice in the matter. Now you have to know the back story to this to understand it fully but she was the one that moved me here to this state when I was young.. away from all my family and with that and my asperger syndrome I never got to know any of my family... and met as*holes for friends when I was growing up so I really have no one to turn to.
So now I either need to finish a portion of this story to sell as a book or I need to find some kind of job I can do to survive....
But the problem is I can't function in any kind of job. I wish I could get some kind of help to do this project but no one takes me seriously because of my asperger's and no history to show that what I have discovered is for real...
To complicate things I have 2 cats who I have to think about too.. they are like my kids and getting older and would die if I wasn't around. I don't want to make them move across country following my crazy mom either. I am worried they may not even make the trip physically either.
This probably won't make any sense to anyone but I am giving it a shot here..
I remember you posting about this mysterious discovery before. I'm still intrigued. Have you PMd Alex about it? He probably has the finances or at least the contacts if it's a viable idea, and being an Aspie himself...
_________________
*Truth fears no trial*
DX AS & both daughters on the autistic spectrum
whirlingmind
Veteran
Joined: 25 Oct 2007
Age: 57
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,130
Location: 3rd rock from the sun
Maybe there is someone on this list that would be approachable:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_pe ... _disorders
...if you ignore the fact that not all of them are proven to have Asperger's and they seem to have included murderers and terrorists on the list as well just to make the general public sustain their erroneous opinions about Aspies.
This one in particular, as an autism activitist could maybe help: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jim_Sinclair_(activist)
_________________
*Truth fears no trial*
DX AS & both daughters on the autistic spectrum
You may have to work at a menial job while you work on your project. These things are not mutually exclusive. I've known some PhDs who've worked as janitors. You just need something to keep a roof over your head and your kitties fed.
I'm curious as to your discovery, but without more information I can't suggest any resources.
OK, truth time mate.
You are sounding a little crazy and a little weird (to me) and as for the why, it's because you are going on and on and on about how important and amazing etc your idea is but refusing to give any details and also bringing in little hints of magical thinking which go against rationality (ie. fact).
Ask yourself this though.. what if I am right? You have to realize the responsibility of this... I know it seems like it doesn't make sense.. but if you knew what I know it makes perfect sense.
I mean I could tell you guys.. but that might jeopardize EVERYONE getting this information. And if that doesn't happen we will all pay. So I am doing this for you too.. look at it that way. Please keep in mind the risk I am taking here as well.. and the risk others could be taking by being the few to have this info. I know it sounds ridiculous and crazy but to me it's reality.
I remember you posting about this mysterious discovery before. I'm still intrigued. Have you PMd Alex about it? He probably has the finances or at least the contacts if it's a viable idea, and being an Aspie himself...
Hi Whirlingmind, I remember you too. Alex? I haven't was this something that we discussed before?
It's been slow going.. I have had a lot of setbacks and things take so much longer than you think they will. If I have to move cross country and go through all this BS it will just be more time and what drives me most crazy about it is how manipulative she is.. she is convinced she is helping me by doing this... and she used the same rationale to move me away from everyone in my family when I was ten years old... family that i never knew because of her loony thinking.
The irony is that without her craziness I might never have been put into the position to discover all this... but I also could have discovered it much sooner? So it's hard to say...
That's a great idea about the list of people with Asperger Syndrome.
I'm curious as to your discovery, but without more information I can't suggest any resources.
That's a good point but what I have found about menial jobs is that these are the toughest kind of people to deal with with asperger syndrome. I have had a lot of problems with people in those kind of jobs.. like physical confrontations etc. I don't know why that is... I am a very big guy though.. and my dad was a big guy and he said smaller guys always felt threatened by him to and would try to start fights. Being an aspie I don;t deal with this as well as my dad did.. he would just kick their butts haha
Being an aspie I have never had that kind of confidence in myself to deal with those situations well. But for me office jobs are just as bad but in a different way.
It's as if the same hyper curiosity I have that helped me discover what I feel is a earth shattering discovery is also what kills me in mundane jobs. I feel like my only alternative might be like disability or SSI or something.. but that seems hopeless too.. This is why I feel like I have nowhere to turn. I feel like if I don't find some way to support myself in a month or 2 then I am screwed. And if I go with my mom then she has "won" in her little game... and she has done this to me literally my whole life....
Forget about the game with your mother, you can't win it. (I live with my Mom too) Just focus on what is the best move for you.
I know what you mean about those jobs: I've been looking for work and I ended up at Walmart putting out the magazines. Well I lasted for 2 weeks (which I consider a personal victory.) It wasn't the work load (which was heavy) it was my boss. She was absolutely horrible. I almost walked off the job twice (my version of punching,) but I managed to give civilized notice. Disability is a good resource. I'm on it, so I don't have to panic financially. But I'm finding it very difficult to find another job.
I'm thinking of going back to school . . . I have no skills which make me employable for anything other than minimum wage jobs. And so far no earth shattering ideas.
whirlingmind
Veteran
Joined: 25 Oct 2007
Age: 57
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,130
Location: 3rd rock from the sun
I remember you posting about this mysterious discovery before. I'm still intrigued. Have you PMd Alex about it? He probably has the finances or at least the contacts if it's a viable idea, and being an Aspie himself...
Hi Whirlingmind, I remember you too. Alex? I haven't was this something that we discussed before?
It's been slow going.. I have had a lot of setbacks and things take so much longer than you think they will. If I have to move cross country and go through all this BS it will just be more time and what drives me most crazy about it is how manipulative she is.. she is convinced she is helping me by doing this... and she used the same rationale to move me away from everyone in my family when I was ten years old... family that i never knew because of her loony thinking.
The irony is that without her craziness I might never have been put into the position to discover all this... but I also could have discovered it much sooner? So it's hard to say...
That's a great idea about the list of people with Asperger Syndrome.
Alex is the site owner. Look on the stickies around the forums and you'll find him to PM. I can't remember if I mentioned contacting him before.
RE your mum, we often think NTs are crazy because we don't get their way of thinking, maybe she's just not really crazy? Or maybe she is somewhere on the spectrum herself. Either way, you may need to look into getting a job and some place alone to live if you want to stay put. Try Googling on local Aspie support places as you might be entitled to supported accommodation or something.
_________________
*Truth fears no trial*
DX AS & both daughters on the autistic spectrum
OK, truth time mate.
You are sounding a little crazy and a little weird (to me) and as for the why, it's because you are going on and on and on about how important and amazing etc your idea is but refusing to give any details and also bringing in little hints of magical thinking which go against rationality (ie. fact).
Ask yourself this though.. what if I am right? You have to realize the responsibility of this... I know it seems like it doesn't make sense.. but if you knew what I know it makes perfect sense.
I mean I could tell you guys.. but that might jeopardize EVERYONE getting this information. And if that doesn't happen we will all pay. So I am doing this for you too.. look at it that way. Please keep in mind the risk I am taking here as well.. and the risk others could be taking by being the few to have this info. I know it sounds ridiculous and crazy but to me it's reality.
I really don't think that, whatever your information is, telling WP is going to jeopardize the dissemination of it. Once something is out on the internet that is it, the proverbial cat is out of the bag. Even if there were nefarious forces at work who could/would threaten anybody who was aware of your information, the likelihood of them being able to track down the hundreds or thousands of people in different countries who read this website is slim to none. No government has the kind of resources to do that so unless we are talking about something /really/ out-there such as aliens, extra-dimensional beings or some kind of "The Matrix" scenario then telling the users of a high-traffic website is precisely how to get what you want to say out into the open.
My internal rationalist is repeating the phrase "extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence". I'm wondering whether the issue is that perhaps you have an extraordinary claim or theory and you don't have the kind of evidence required to back it up, hence your reticence to talk in further detail.
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