Why Do I Worry About This?

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Over a year ago, I became friends (acquaintainces?) with a person who's a hockey fan like me. This person is really, really cool, and I believe is also an aspie. A group of a few of us have hung out a few times, and she regularly talks to everyone but me, even initiates conversation with them. The few interactions I've had with her have been very vague, aloof, etc. It's like she's afraid of me or something. The conversations are always one-sided.

The thing is, I shouldn't let this bother me, but it does. And it's driving me crazy.

Have any of you ever gone through a similar situation? Is it just me?

Sounds like she's having a wrong idea about you.

Yes, I've gone through something like that many times. But most of the time people like that are not really worth worrying about because they are judging you without really knowing you. Of course you could give them a chance, but in most cases they just confirm that they are not worth it.

EDIT: fixed a mistake

Deep down inside, I know it's not worth the hassle, because there are quite a few people in my life who reciprocate very well towards me. I should focus my energy on them. But there are some people you feel a connection to, and it's just hard to shake.

The more I think about it, the more I think she's flirting with one of my friends, which is totally fine because 1.) I'm in a relationship already and 2.) I don't find her attractive.

But who knows? I tend to have radical shifts in thought when it comes to stuff like this.

She sounds rude and ill-mannered.

But at the same time, you're projecting a lot of what you want to see onto her...like assuming she's an aspie and thinking you have a connection because of that and for liking hockey. So perhaps you're unaware of your own behavior and why she may be put off by it. Perhaps you're assuming you two should be better friends than you are, and she's turned off by it.

Hard to say based on what is in the post. It's possible she really likes you and feels shy around you for that reason but it's hard to say for sure.

Are you good enough friends you can simply ask her? She may not be aware she's doing that, but if asked to tell you why, she might think about it and tell you.

I've been on the opposite side of this one a couple times. I wonder if it's from having things in common that aren't on a superficial level. I'd like to think of myself as a forthright person, but maybe that hesitation was due to needing more confidence in some areas. This probably doesn't explain your situation, but that's what comes to mind for me.

It also can stem from having someone I'd like to get to know better, but knowing I probably don't have the ability socially to do so. The few times I didn't wait for an approach, I always seem to stick my foot in a steaming mess instead.

Maybe they are shy? Maybe they just have nothing to say to you? Maybe they don't like you?

I wouldn't read too much into it. I'm a quiet person.