Do NTs treat you like their younger than you?

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Does anyone else feel like NTs treat you like your younger than them. There's this girl who sits with me at lunch and one time we were talking about boyfriends and she ask will you get a boyfriend when you older. And another time another girl asked "what are you doing at the weekend?" And I said my cousin was coming over. She said "is she coming over to play?" I don't have any "special instersts that are seen as "childish" and she doesn't know I have AS. She's in the same year as me.So why does she treated me like I'm younger than her?

It's really tough to explain it. Others may have the impression that they grow up faster than you when I find in most cases in my life it might be the opposite. I'm actually more emotionally mature than most people my age, but give off the impression that I am not as mature as others somehow. I find it's hard for people to understand what could make me different when all they want is someone more normal and more compliant to the normal rules they know and live by. So connections seem to be hard to come by for that reason. NT's don't seem to like the idea of changing the rules and expect you to change for them. It's a harsh world, but you have to try and prove that you are just as capable of them as playing by the rules because noone likes to accept someone unless they prove they are capable of being equal.

No, I'm 19. If they are your age then I would see it as strange, but most likely they are just saying that because you seem to not want a girlfriend right now. It isn't really that big of a deal. I have girls flirting with me already so I don't have to worry about it. In truth, it is childish to rush into loving relationships, you haven't become the man you are going to become yet.

I've always felt other kids at high school spoke to me like I was younger than them. I remember when I was about 14 I fancied this stupid window-cleaner and I soon everyone in the class knew about it. And I was looking through a magazine which had different pictures of people, and I said to one of the other girls, ''I like that man there because he looks like the window-cleaner that I fancy.'' And the girl said, ''you like that picture because he looks like your window-cleaner, do you?'' And I knew that tone of voice. I wasn't a ''I'm taking the mickey'' voice or a jokey friendly voice, it was more of a voice you use when you see a 6-year-old holding hands with another 6-year-old of the opposite sex, kind of thing.

Our facial expressions, body language, and social skills tend to seem childish to NTs because we are still learning things they learned naturally when they were children and we tend not to have the same control over our emotions as they do. Especially if we start talking about something we're interested in, we tend to get excited like a little kid does. Adults usually don't do this because they have learned it's expected that they have more control than that. It's difficult for us to understand what is appropriate and mature and what seems childish. I don't think there's much to be done about it. I'm 28 and I still realize now and then that I've just said or done something that seems childish. I can even see/hear it in my own behavior and voice sometimes. Often people much younger than me treat me like a child, because unfortunately those are just the signals I give off. Sounds like you might have the same problem.

Yep, most of my friends in high school were least a few months younger than me, sometimes more, and though only two of them know I have AS (though one doesn't believe it), they all treated me like I was younger than them. On my speech/debate team, there were only between six to ten of us, and we became like a family... in spite of the fact that I was one of the older ones, I was treated like the baby. I didn't mind it, because it was obvious I was less socially and emotionally mature than they were, but now that I look back on it, it does seem a little strange that kids who were younger than me were taking me under their wing. Strangely enough, I still hang out with the friend who knows about my AS, and she's the only one who treats me as an equal age-wise.

Even my younger sisters always treated me like I was younger. They would bully me and pick on me constantly, and always talked down to me like I was an embarrassment.

On the other hand, my friends were always much older. Usually teachers or neighbors at least 15 years older than me. While to the eyes of people my own age I acted very young, to older and wiser adults who judged me based on my intelligence and insightful conversation I was very mature for my age. The kids expected me to know about popular music and television shows and gossip and fashion and all that other nonsense, and I failed all those tests. On the other hand, the adults were amazed by my education (much of it independent study in my spare time) and understanding of advanced concepts. We could discuss science, history, politics, and literature, and they never treated me like a child. Meanwhile the children were busy bullying me for being weird and crying too easily.

Yes. Once people get to know me a bit, they start talking to me like I'm a child. This is true even for people half my age. I realize I come off as slow-witted and naive, and there really isn't any way I can change it. The only people who ever saw me as anything but stupid were my teachers, professors, and psychologists. It's pretty much killed the little desire for social interaction I had.

BTW maybe it's not you.
but maybe it is,

how do you act/present yourself?
remember that most people "judge a book by a superficial examination of surfaces, appearances and/or title"
(which isn't quite as snappy as "they judge a book by it's cover")

is it more important to appear a certain way (more mature, older, something else) or,
more important to you, to act and dress in the way that would need changed.


useless advice: enjoy it while you can because once you're no longer mistaken for young, you'll wish you were...

There are so many factors that could contribute to this. It depends on the people around you, how well they know you, how they perceive you, etc., along with factors involving yourself.

From my experience, it's an odd combination of things. In social matters, I feel like some view me as younger than them. But in matters of intellectual things, life decisions/advice, and important stuff, they look at me as way older (but in a good way). But then, my group of really good friends, I think, sense my awkwardness in social stuff and, rather than viewing me as younger, help me. But, when it comes to things that they view me as more mature in, then I help them out. So it works out well with my group of close friends.

In my case, yes.

Due to our social awkwardness, and the fact that most of us lack social connections and thus ignorant of the things that is common knowledge for the people of our age group (rumors, common interests, gossip, etc), we tend to be seen as lacking maturity and being 'childish'. Also, our behavior plays a large part on this too, as many of the characteristics associated with AS (e.g. repetitive thinking, general naiveness from lack of ability to read 'between the lines', slow reactions, lack of focus, etc) are perceived as childish behavior. Lots of times I had a lot of people around my age treat me like I am a kid to them (well not exactly like a kid, but they treat me as they treat people ~3 years younger than them while they're actually the same age group as me).