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Theres a lot of symptoms of "aspergers" that many people supposidly have. Thats what makes aspergers really confusing. But the difference is when the person has many of those symptoms and all to the extreme. Some of those traits you list can easily be "personality" traits from many people. Most people might just have a few of those mildly. When I tell people, I am socially awkward, they think they can relate but get really frustrated when it really comes down to it. It really comes down to when you just think your child is being a brat, stubborn, and not making sense to your NT brain is where the AS comes in. In my opinion, for the milder cases.

For example, I've been shy and socially awkward all my life but my NT mom was also shy and socially awkward when she was a kid. There are a lot of my social problems I've had that my mom couldnt understand and was thinking "cut it out already". She just never encountered that despite her supposid past of being socially awkward, shy and not talking.

Was your kid actually diagnosed?

So, if you don't believe your son has Asperger's, why the hell are you posting here?

Perhaps looking for attention?

I really can't see why you have come on this site to argue using the case of a child that you do not even know.

At an age of 2 1/2 years a diagnosis of Aspergers is debatable anyway.

You have to understand: Autism is the extreme end of a spectrum that blends quite smoothly into the typical. Near the border, you will see people who have traits that you could find in typical people; only those traits are stronger, enough to cause disability.

If you don't stare at the sunlight when you're in a car, you're normal. If the sunlight coming through a car window will give you a splitting headache and cause you to cry helplessly whenever you don't wear wraparound sunglasses even on cloudy days, then that's a problem.

If you like to wear socks that fit, you're normal. If the seams on socks can cause you to be so uncomfortable that you can't help but tear them off and go barefoot, you have a sensory problem.

Normal kids will spin, rock, flap their hands, and generally fidget. They do that; they're kids. Heck, even adults like that. The difference is mainly one of degree: Autistics depend on this repetitive motion to be able to think clearly and cope with their world. Without it, they may zone out, shut down, or become so distressed they begin to cry. Older autistics often learn to stim surreptitiously.

Normal kids learn to talk at two. Autistics may learn to talk at four... or they may learn to talk at one, by repeating memorized phrases... or they may learn to talk at two, but speak so formally that it sounds like they're reading out loud. If communication is impaired, if you can't have a conversation, that's a problem.

Disability is not some alien thing that's completely outside of human experience. Autism includes many experiences that typical people have. Most mental and some physical illnesses are similar. Most people get sad; only a few become too depressed to leave their beds. Many people are short; only some have dwarfism. Some people wear thick glasses; if the glasses don't work enough to get to 20/200, we call that being legally blind. Social awkwardness, introversion, sensitivity to one's surroundings, and strong talent or weakness are all normal--but intensify them, and the person can no longer cope with a world that is set up for people with the average skill set. At that point, you call it autism and you get the kid some help with learning the things that don't come naturally.

I am troubled by this instinctive rejection of "autism" as a real thing, just because NTs can relate to the milder symptoms of the milder cases. When parents and teachers are in denial, the child often doesn't get the help they need. They grow up putting out 100% effort to get to barely adequate, often burning out periodically, suffering bullying and abuse, convinced that they are stupid, rebellious, rude, or lazy. If that child were to get just a little bit of extra help to fill in the gap--and with the mild cases, it truly is just a little that can make a huge difference--then they could go about their lives pretty much the same way any kid does. Disability doesn't mean you can't be smart, doesn't mean you can't do cool things; it doesn't make you utterly different from everybody else. It's just a normal part of human existence.

I should probably point out the reasons for a diagnosis I received to begin with if you want to understand why an Aspergers or Autism label may be given.

1. Self-esteem issues.
2. Depression/anxiety issues.
3. Hypersensitivity to criticisms
4. Sensitivity to loud sounds
5. Aggressive behaviour towards others when being teased or picked on
6. Repetitive speech pattern.
7. Daily routine and self absorbed behaviour.

There is always going to be arguments about whether someone needs to be labelled with something or not. This is how therapists and doctors make money. Some doctors or therapists are even falsely diagnosing people. You have to remember that your kid is living freely and is just being himself. Has he even been to daycare yet?

He was yes. But that doesn't mean it's right. And millions of us have social anxiety, shyness, etc. I'm not saying you're not right. I had all the so-called symptoms of Asperger's as a kid but I was in a physically and emotionally abusive home. I think if you make a child feel like he has something wrong with him ,which in their little minds makes them feel "ret*d" ,which is how it makes them feel,and you keep pumping that into their heads, of course they will OVERREACT,feel different,have social problems.,Then throw in medications which do absolutely nothing you're creating a mental condition. That's why Dr.s are on the verge of declaring Asperger's a non existent condition. It's more of a group for parents to get attention at the childs expense. Münchausen syndrome by proxy ? Hmmmmmm

Jason L

Doctors aren't on the verge of declaring AS a non-existent condition. Parents aren't responsible for the existence of AS as a diagnosis in the first place - that would be Lorna Wing, who did a lot of work to get children with AS recognized.

What changed was that AS was merged into a more encompassing "Autism Spectrum Disorder" in the DSM-5. People (not just children) who were diagnosed with AS before will under the DSM-5 instead be diagnosed with ASD, if they still meet the criteria. If not, there's always Social Communication Disorder.

It sounds like your issues with your son's diagnosis is more about you than it is about the medical profession. Your post actually reminds me of parents whose children are diagnosed with ADHD, and those parents say that ADHD does not exist because "everyone is like that." And by everyone they mean themselves, because they also have ADHD.

The common traits seen in aspergers are often seen in all people.

If you were treated like that, told that you are 'ret*d', when you were younger then I hope you are getting help for this. There is no need to repeat this behaviour.

There are no medications for Aspergers or a cure so I suggest you do a bit more research on the subject, for your son's benefit if not your own.

If you would like a reasonable discussion then maybe chose thread titles that are not inflammatory or potentially seen as trollish behaviour.

You have the opportunity to understand your child better and perhaps make demonstrative changes in his quality of life and you squander it like this??? That's all the label does-- it lets you know about and accommodate certain things about him. If you refuse to see that he is different from other children, how is he going to get the care and understanding he needs?

For your son's sake I hope he doesn't exist and you are a troll, because he is about to run into a brick wall (that's you) at full force.

I was not diagnosed until I was 22. I think many of us who never had a diagnosis, and those of us with a diagnosis but with parents who did not care about or understand autism would like to say some very strong words to you right now.

I had a great deal of problems as a child due to my ASD, but they were unrecognized due to never getting a diagnosis. How could my problems have come from people telling me I had "something wrong with me" if nobody ever actually told me that? I wasn't "overreacting" to my diagnosis-- I was "overreacting" to a world that didn't make sense to me because my brain was different.

I suspect Verdandi is right. You only think "everyone is like that" because you probably have traits of autism yourself, but nobody ever gave you the compassion and space you needed to deal with it, and you think that's the way you ought to treat your son. Sorry, no.

ADHD is a different issue and yes it's real. I wasn't called ret*d as a kid..lol. And this has nothing to do with me. ANd when people react to other peoples views as you all are, who is this really about now? Tell me why my son has NEVER exhibited ANY of the symptoms of Asperger's while he and I are alone? Only when his Mom is there? He is outgoing, social, doesn't "run in circles", or FREAK OUT over anything? How can you explain that ? Everytime he dropped his ice cream cone and cried I didn't call his therapist! All I'm saying is it's the "in thing"these days, Like Ikea and reality shows. Maybe SOME people have it but don't they say you grow out of it? If so that sounds a lot like growing up. Sorry to offend anyone and starting an 'Asperger's riot" No wonder the kids have outbursts. They learn by example

J

Why make a faux apology and then stick another insult on the end.

Come on here talking about some blog you saw somewhere. What is your point?