Problems at camp

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Since 2cd grade, I have been going to a really cool camp where you get to build a lot of things and experiment, however, I have always been treated unfairly there.

My second year, something happened and I heard this conversation coming from the bathroom:

"OMG, Melanie is so rude!"

And someone replied

"Yeah, she is really weird"

(By the way, I am Melanie )

I was SO upset, especially considering I was only in third grade. I reported this and nothing was done about it.

In my third year, my group was being very mean to me, not even trying any of my ideas and saying "WE ARE NOT DOING THAT!! !! !" And stuff like that. I started crying and the person who worked there came in and said "what's wrong?" I reported everything they said and said that they were "mean and rude and didn't listen to my ideas even though mine were the only good ones" this got me yelled at in front of everyone and he said to come to his room in a very loud voice, so I screamed "NO!! !! !" In the same voice tone. He started screaming at me more then forced me into his room and called my parents.

This year there was a group of girls who were being extremely rude.

First, while I was in line they all butted in front of me then started arguing with each other about who was first. I then stated that I was actually in front of all of them and they yelled "It dosent matter, were all going to the same place!!" In a rude tone and all the group members gave me dirty looks.


Next, I got in line and they shouted "You can't just but like that! Go to the back of the line!". I thought that was the back and and walked away saying "I thought that was the back, sorry"
They then gave me dirty looks again.

Next I had no group and the teacher put me into the group with them, and they all had a disgusted look on their face. That made six in our group and for the activity you could only use the stamp five times. I called second and they agreed, but when it was my turn someone else stamped. I asked why and they said "I called it first" which they did not, They then said I could have third but someone else took third, so I said, "Ok......I will be fourth" and someone screamed "NO! I CALLED FOURTH!! !! !! !" . After that i say "but I was third and someone took It, so I should be fourth..." They then screamed "NOO!" And then i said i would be Fifth and someone said they already called that....After that the teacher came over and forced them to let me stamp and then they pretended to be nice to me after that,


Another incident with a different person was I sat down and 2 minutes later a guy sat down next to me. He took one look at me then got up and left.


Also, when I sat down to work in a group (everyone who wanted to work at that station was a group) and they said "no you can't work here, we already have our ideas and we don't want you to be a part of it" which hurt my feelings alot


The final incident happened today, june 26 2013, (All of the things this year have happened this week) when my group in something was saying ideas. I said mine and the guy screamed "NO!! That won't work we will not do that!! !! !" I said we should try it and he said "NO!! We are not allowed to do that!! !!" And then I said "the teacher never said that" then he ignored me and did his idea without explaining and refused to explain it. I reported this and the teacher said to keep trying and do my own thing if it dosen't work out.About 10 minutes later I reported again and he said "you know what all the councilors told me? It is that all you do Is say no one will work with you/no one want you in our groups and I don't believe that" which upset me alot and I just left and did my best to work.

do you think I was treated unfairly? If so, what should I do?

NOTE: The OP of this thread is only ELEVEN YEARS OLD! So, let's keep it clean and nice, please.

@Melanie: Tweens and teens can be so mean! I'm sorry you're going through this. Please try to focus on your own accomplishments, and don't let them drag you down. I don't know if it's jealousy on their part, or that they don't like people who are "different" in some way. either way, it can be a rough go - they seem to have to drag others down to their level in order to feel anything "good" about themselves, so it's their problem, and not yours!

Best Wishes,

Fnord

I'm not as much concerned for you as I am for someone who would post a mean reply to you ... I'd hate to see some inconsiderate, arrogant, and bullying troll get banned ...



Actually, you seem to have a good handle on the situation. It's still a bad one to be in, but I'd be willing to bet that you'll eventually surpass all of those bullies in some important way!

I would relay your concerns to a teacher(camp elder- we dont have them in the uk so).. i had alot of similar stuff when i was around your age, very unpleasant the other children might be intimidated by your ideas, but they have no excuse for giving you a hard time and someone in authority should be notified to help you out

Reading this thread actually caused me some anxiety as I relived the way people treated me when I was in school... I have no real advice for you because I still haven't really come to terms with things like this that have happened to me, but things are much better now that I am no longer in school. One thing that I'm not sure is helpful or applicable or not is to learn how to laugh at yourself. A lot of what kids do is testing you. They say something and depending on how you respond is how they view you from then on. If you laugh instead of getting upset in some cases I think it helps.

I had a similar reaction to SphinxFace... Your story sounded very familiar to me. This is more or less how a lot of my group activities went when I was younger, so you're definitely not alone in feeling the way you do.
I'm glad to hear that you're proud of your accomplishments! Those mean kids won't be able to take those away from you! When they start getting you down, just remember how much good you've done and how successful you can be when given the chance!
I also like SphinxFace's recommendation about laughing at yourself! Just yesterday I had a group of adults (and one teenager) laughing at me because of how excited I was about my new planner! They thought I was kidding (they thought they were laughing with me, I guess) and when I told them that I was being sincere they seemed to think I was weird. Then I just admitted to being weird! "Yeah... I love my planner... I guess I'm a geek like that!" That got them laughing again!
Sure, I do some weird stuff, but, like you, there's a lot about myself that I'm proud of!

@Melanie
I've experienced this when I was your age. In all honesty, just insult them. School is a war zone and if "normal" kids think they can hurt your feelings, well guess what? So can you! An eye for an eye. Don't worry about getting in trouble, cause at your age, consequences aren't really a factor. When your parents question you, tell them the truth that they harassed you for months(lie if applicable) until you couldn't take it anymore. And whatever you do, if you're threatened with a punishment like expulsion(which would be silly) or any other punishment, then just lie that other kids were causing physical harm to you. Don't feel bad if actions are taken against the other kids, they're still really young and probably deserved it for bullying anyways.

Bullying isn't fair, so why should you play fair? Good luck!

I would suggest ignoring MoonCanvas' advice.

This is very much easier said than done, but I would suggest trying not to care. If someone says something mean to you, then just brush it off. If people try and exclude you, then oh well, it's not the end of the world. I realise that's not really how things work, and it does hurt, and I am being quite insensitive by telling you to brush off something that seems impossible to brush off... but if you can, then you'll never be hurt by that sort of person again.

You just basically summed up my entire elementary school career. All I can tell you is things do get better. Once I reached high school I meet the girl who was also often left out and she eventually became my best irl friend. She introduced me to her group of friends and they accepted me weirdness and all. That helped a lot with the bulling problems because unlike me they had the courage and self-esteem to speak up for themselves and they even spoke up for me and comforted me when I needed it.

The point I'm trying to make is try and find people that are also forced out and left to themselves. You may find some like-minded people among them and you know what they say about strength in numbers. Until then just try to they out of that group's way as much as you can. Simple things like waiting until after they go through the lunch line to get your food can make a big difference sometimes.

It's really not fair that you should have to change because people are being jerks to you, but the best solution might be to talk to your parents about what's going on, and see if they can get you enrolled in a different camp that does similar activities. Or, if there are none, go to the counselors with your parents and explain about your ASD, tell them what difficulties it causes you, and the fact that the other campers are treating you poorly because of things you can't help; giving the other kids the rundown of AS and what it means might just resonate with a few of the less cruel ones who may then take it upon themselves to be nicer to you. I'm sorry you have to deal with all this; kids can be really mean