Unrecognizable people

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Hey all. I'm new here, and anywhere to be honest. I'm looking for advice, and, well, this is about all I can think of. I've had a really bad day, and really hope somebody can give me some advice. As I'm typing this through streaming eyes just now, because I have been so incredibly scared beyond myself.

I'll start with background. I'm 27yo with AS. I was diagnosed officially 6 months ago, but have been told I have AS since I was in primary school, and have always just accepted it.
My story will be a familiar one to many. I'm an expert with computers, preferring to spend hours on them than minutes with another human. I was good in school, but social difficulties made me perform lower in certain classes than 'the norm'. Despite not liking people however, I've always managed to remember them, cataloguing them in a sense. If I meet someone once, I remember them, and then, even if I don't see them for years, next time I will remember who they are, and generally where and when I met them. Recently I've started a new job as a youth worker, and I'm struggling to remember who all of the members are, but I've just accepted it's because of the large influx (50+) of names, and I'm gathering them slowly. It's unusual for me, but I don't think it's abnormal in the grand scheme of things.

Today has been another thing completely however. I went to walk to work earlier, and somebody came and started speaking to me. I was a sociable as I could be, but the conversation made me very awkward. This was someone I didn't recognise at all, just walking along with me. I assumed they recognised me from work, and I didn't want to admit to not knowing them. As they were speaking however they made me more and more edgy, as they were asking more and more personal things. Not in an actual questioning way, but about what the doctor said in my last appointment, whether I dealt with plans to get my daughter on Monday, etc etc. I got really really nervous, and ended up having an asthma attack, to which they presented me with my inhaler from their handbag. They'd just picked up my prescription for me - the stranger was my mum, but I didn't recognise her at all.
I had the same thing happen to me a few years ago at a christmas party, when I didn't recognise my sister, but at the time I hadn't seen her for many months, and she had put on quite a bit of weight, so I just sort of shrugged it off. In this case however, I saw my mum on wednesday, so I don't have such an excuse.

I'm basically looking for advice from anyone, on how to deal with this. Is this common in people with AS, and is there anything that can be done to help it? I can't cope with getting so scared of people, especially not family, and this was by far the most terrifying thing I have ever experienced.

I am so sorry that you are suffering through this. *virtual hug*

The technical term for forgetting faces is Prosopagnosia, and this does affect quite a few Aspies. Usually, however, the impairment is more consistent, as in the effected person always struggles with faces; the fact that it seems to be so sporadic and causes acute anxiety could be cause to visit a neurologist. You may also be suffering from cognitive burnout and thus temporarily losing some priory obtained skills due to the stress. These skills, however, are often regained. I would definitely bring this up with a professional.

If it makes you feel any better, I have also had an instance of not recognizing my own mother; in this case, I had not seen her in person for six years, but I had seen recent photographs of her prior to the incident.

In any instance, I hope that things improve for you.

I can relate to intermittent prosopognosia. It has caused me embarrassment more than once. For the most part, I can recognize people, but sometimes not, and I can't put my finger on why.

I have this sometimes, too. I didn't recognize my own brother in public once and flipped him off when he honked at me. I find seeing people out of context makes it really hard for me to place them, even if they're close to me.

Me too.

Thanks guys. It helps to know it's not only me, although it still sucks - for all of us
I'll be going in to check with GP first thing tomorrow. It would have been my first port of call if it hadn't been the weekend.
Much appreciated. I'm at least slightly less worried... even if I am still terrified.

Arka, I really wouldn't be worried until you consult with your doctor. I'm not sure of your age, but I've noticed that some of my AS symptoms are getting worse as I age even as I get better at living. Then, the only thing worse than getting older is the alternative.

Good luck!

If you are not used to seeing your mother in that particular context then maybe that was the cause of the problem. I can be quite confusing for someone with ASD to see someone in a context they don't recognise, and can cause temporary face blindness. I've never had it as bad as you just described but I still get confused over faces sometimes.

I just saw my roommate unexpectedly out and about last night and I didn't recognize her ... I know who she is, I see her every day at home, but if I don't expect to see that person somewhere different, I have problems understanding why that person is waving at me.

Most 27 year olds are 27.

I've had similar encounters, and know that I have mild prosopognosia. I learned years ago from a book to simply memorize one or more distinctive features of the faces of people I regularly interact with, and rely on that to help me identify someone who starts talking to me. I use everything from shape of ear lobes or nostrils to eye color (if unusual), brow ridges, or chin shape.

I suppose this technique works better for people who are visually oriented and have good memories/recall. I also use voice characteristics, since my ears are very sensitive. As a result of practice, I only embarrass myself nowadays when someone shows me a photo of a person and I fail to recognize the person in the photo. This has even happened when the person was showing me photos of herself at an office party, and I didn't recognize her. Given the magnitude of the other social blunders I continue to commit without realizing it, I don't find the prosopognosia bothersome.

And you can always ask. Last week I was meeting the wife of a friend at a theater, and simply told her to find me, since waiting for me to find her would be pointless. She didn't mind in the least; she actually found it entertaining, and asked me if I had prosopognosia, which she knows about because of her work.