Why are words so difficult?

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Hi, I would like to talk about the words "have to", "must", "should".

Examples

"I have to go to school"
"I have to go to the bathroom"
"I have to eat"
"I have to do exercises"

"Have to" is usually linked to an "if", it has no meaning
without realizing what the "if" is.

Examples

"I have to go to school, if I want to get a job later"
"I have to go to the bathroom, if I don't want to wet my pants"
"I have to eat, if I want to stay healthy"
"I have to do exercises, if I don't want to become more sick"

Now before I go on, compare this with the word "must".

"I must go to school, it is the law"
"I must go to the bathroom, or I will wet my pants"
"I must eat, or I will die"
"I must do exercises, or I will get sick"

If anything "must" because it is the law - then that is hardly
a reason for me - it's just a intermediate reason. So really,
it would be:

"I must go to school, or I will be put in prison"

Hence, "must" is related to an "or" phrase.

Now, one would expect these relations to help one with
making decision on what to do... but that is not the case
because there is some unknown factor: time.

Really, it is:

"I must go to school, or eventually I would end up in prison"
"I must go to the bathroom, or eventually I will wet my pants"
"I must eat, or eventually I will die"
"I must do exercises, or eventually I will become very sick"

So, now one has to make a decision on day-to-day basis
whether or not to do these things. Not doing it for a while
usually has NOT the consequences that one is afraid of...

The real question is therefore: When SHOULD I do it? If one
waits, and waits and waits... you get,

"I should go to school, the risk is becoming too large"
"I should go to the bathroom, the risk is becoming too large"
"I should eat, it has been too long that I didn't"
"I should do exercises, or I won't be able to recover anymore, ever"

However - also that is too black&white. Statistics are already
involved now - but in reality one has to take into account the
severeness of the recovery; for example - staying away from
school won't get you to prison immediately - but it might have
a huge effect on your future life that you cannot recover from.
The effect is permanent, but gradually.

Not going to the bathroom is probably purely statistical. If you
make it, you make it, if you don't you don't. This is one of the
easiest ones to deal with.

Same with eating, mostly because eating is pleasant.

The hardest one of the above is doing exercises. I have the
tendency to sit behind my PC nonstop - every day. Every muscle
has started to hurt now, and I found that it is necessary to
get up at LEAST every 30 minutes and do excersizes. However,
assuming that I can recover by doing exercises, the question
remains: do I have to get up NOW? When I have a lot of pain,
I can actually get myself to do exercises every half an hour,
but once the pain is less, I often don't - until it gets bad again.

The result is that I have constantly pain and constantly worry
that I won't be able to recover anymore (I've had RSI for 5 years
before I managed to recover from that... right now I have already
a few months pain in my hip muscle... I SHOULD completely stop
sitting behind my PC... but that is too much. This is my life

How is it possible to rationally know that one should do something,
but still you don't DO it?

I have that with a lot more things than doing exercises.

I know I should, but I don't.

Does anyone else recognize that?

Hi Run

Words are only difficult when one takes them literally ( as most Aspies do!!) or expect them to carry a definitive, categorically absolute and ultimate meaning.

Words are actually ONLY symbols for the real things - so they can be stretched, diminished, altered, to make them fit the 'thing' of interest/topic at the given moment.

Not sure whether this helps. I was a bit confused because your question seems to morph into something else completely!

Hi, Run!
I loved reading your post!
Yes, I fight with the "shoulds" every day... I have to process the things that I should do to understand WHY I should be doing them, eg: I know I should clean my floors, but do I do it because it's what I'm supposed to do (conformity) or because it's a hygienic issue?
I usually decide to put on a clean pair of socks instead...HA!!

I am sorry. I do not have problems with words, I found out
that they can have different meanings. Or actually, if someone
else is talking then they have a different meaning than what
is actually said. I deal with that by making a translation before
I (re)act.

My post was actually about the problem of doing things,
or not do things. Things one should do.

I never clear my floor - well, once a year maybe, but because
I feel like it - not because it has to be done.

I usually put on the socks that lay closest to me. It is near impossible
for me to decide whether or not to put my clothes in the washing machine,
so I always have all my clothes laying around in the house and I wear
all of them at random. I asked my mother how to decide when to wash
them, and she says: when they smell bad. But because they lay around
a long time before I get to the same clothes again, they never smell bad.
Nevertheless - I only wash them when they smell bad (they actually do,
sometimes). I put on new underwear every day (and I take a shower
every day). I am glad I do that every day, because it would be hell to
make a decision about that.

I think it's human nature to have difficulty doing something you know you should.

Something you even want to.

Example: every night I think "I should wash the dishes before the last 20 minutes before bed", but I never do.

However I think if you really, *really* want something, and the price of not doing it is too high--example: "I must do yoga tonight or I will have severe back pain tomorrow"--you can force yourself to do it with enough frequency that it becomes a habit.

You're from Amsterdam Run?? DUDE, I just visited that and some more of Holland during the Christmas break!! !

My attention deviated from the first post, but I can guess what the topic is about.

Also, do you use abbreviations? I noticed that so far you haven't, and it's just my made-up character Kipo does!

I don't understand this.

Well. Since I'm unpublished author of 4 books so far I have to say when people say things to be I always take the literal way.