People who are not Aspie or NT

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I know I've posted a thread about this. Is there anyone else who feels like they aren't Aspie or NT?

I have aspie traits - diagnosed by psychologist but not one that specializes in Asperger's/autism. Sometimes, I feel like a poseur and sometimes I feel like I finally found people like me.

I have aspie traits, but I also have NT traits and a lot of problems that are totally unrelated to having ASD. Whenever I talk about problems I have people always blame it on my "autism", even if it's obviously unrelated.

yeah. sometimes it is like the only people who know much about autism are people with autism.

and i certainly have NT traits.

I think I have an undiagnosable condition. I was diagnosed with autism because some of my behaviors were vaguely autistic. None of the autism treatments are effective on me.

What treatments have you tried?

I've gone to social skills classes. It was kind of a waste of time because my social skills weren't improving and I already knew a lot of the stuff they were teaching intuitively. I just don't have enough energy to have proper social skills. I've also gotten "life skills help." The main reason my life skills are poor is because I lack energy. I hate those groups even more than social skills groups. They often treated me like I was a stupid little kid. They had way too many stupid rules. That might work for real aspies who thrive on rules. I don't think I have rigid thinking, I think people assume I do because of my diagnosis.

I have low energy, too. Is your's the result of depression?

Hence, the low energy. Not much left over after paying for the impulses.

I have traits of an ASD but also seem to diverge away from its symptoms in certain ways according to what I have read thus far. It may be that my reading is incomplete.

I am also not formerly diagnosed and have a diagnosis of Social Anxiety and depression. They can be factors in regards to my social difficulties but do not cover all of them by any means.

For example I am not always nervous about talking to people, I just have nothing to say to them. The contents of my head differ greatly from the contents of their head. They concern themselves with the latest reality tv show, the newest trend or the hottest nightspot. I am interested in unraveling the mysteries of the universe and actually enjoy studying, writing essays and sitting exams (god my exams were fun...wish I could get back into formal study again). I used to spend hours researching in the library. It was not work...it was my pleasure.

I do well grade wise, I don't worry about that, more often than not I get A grades anyway so why fret it? I just loved learning and wanted to know as much as I could, but not by using rote memorisation. I am a reflective learner. I have to explore the material in order to spot patterns and understand the relationships involved. I am also divergent in my thinking. I am not always a fan of mainstream theory and think many of the most popular theories used today are flawed..especially in the field of psychology.

Most people don't understand my love of learning.

I hate sitting around making social chit chat most of the time (unless the conversation is particularly fascinating in which case I enjoy a good verbal exchange of thought and and information with someone, however it is rare that I can find someone to converse with that fluidly). I get bored...I hate sitting (full stop unless I am mentally involved in something I enjoy such as reading a book) and I dislike most conversations I have with people. I get bored basically and I lose my ability to concentrate when that happens. I can't help it and don't mean it in an insulting way...regular everyday chit chat just does not hold my attention. Either my brain wonders off (if I am distracted by my own somewhat more interesting thoughts...or at least I find them more interesting even if no one else does) or I do if distracted something external in the environment (ooooh interesting thing in a museum...oooo interesting book....ooooo new knitting project as I have a needlecrafts thing in the process of appearing right now). I have gotten distracted and literally left people talking to themselves because my brain saw something fascinating and forgot (genuinely lost focus and forgot) the person was standing there talking to me.

I also have samenesses and can like certain routines like people on the spectrum (I always like to do certain things in the same way over and over again) however, outside of those few things I love to try new and different stuff. I want experience. I want to explore, I want to learn, i want to understand...I am curious.

Keeping me stuck in boring old la la lets sit down and watch telly and make chitty chat land is driving me nuts.

I am not afraid of failure instead I am curious about my skill...ie I always wanted to push my education as far as I could just to see where my ability ended. At what level of education would it have become too difficult for me to get A grades and when would I have needed to start revising for exams in order to do it (outstanding memory I have). I would have had to push it to failure to find out. Unfortunately my health got in my way (thanks migraine headaches and IBS) and stopped me so I never got to answer my question. Now funding and people complaining about my ability being intimidating when i do study are my main issues in regards to going back into education. If I ever resolve those though..off I will go.

I need to be in a class of really secure people I think. They need to restructure the education system. Not only did I have to spend a lot of time waiting for everyone else to catch up before I could move on at school (god help me I got bored and took to being a chronic daydreamer to help me cope with the boredom of having to wait...and wait....and wait...and do the work already some of us want to learn the next thing stuff) but people were pissed off and gave me hard time because I was naturally good at things and could learn very quickly. If not in a class of those with equal ability and a healthy self esteem I can't function in the educational environment.

I can also have issues with group work. I work best alone.

I do have intensive interests although sometimes they can be patchy and I can be fickle. At the moment my brain won't pick one...its jumping from one interest to another. My brain wants to try it all....too much curiosity, cant choose...I had this problem when I trying to pick a degree.

"Ohhh that looks like an interesting subject, oh and that one, um and that one, um oooo that too...um which one do I choose?" In the end I tend to give up and do none of it because I just can't decide. I could have gotten good grades in anyone of them, my skills in that way are fairly equal across the board with a minor fluctuations (but nothing significant...I get a B or B+ instead of an A).

Sometimes I hone in on one particular interest because it becomes a problem in regards to my brain wanting to jump from one thing to another all time and my not being able to make my mind up. On saying that when I do get my brain to play ball and 'get into' something it becomes obsessive in nature. I want to know everything about it. I have fallen in love with it and I will literally spend hours learning about it or doing research.

If something bores me...or I can't muster up the interest I have the concentration span of a goldfish with Alzheimer's Disease and so it's pointless trying to get me to pay attention to anything.

I also I seem to be a bit more energetic than most people I meet....I get bored. I have boredom issues. Boredom is not good for me, it makes me scatty brained.

Also I have trouble reading some social cues they seem to be illogical, pointless and made up.

Most of the time people really don't make a lot of sense and I do wish they would stop with the over simplifying everything. No wonder some of today's theories are poppy cock. I bet they left out important details that might have changed the over all interpretation or meaning of the raw data! Tut.

So I have some similarities with ASD people but veer away in some respects (I think). It maybe that my reading is not yet complete as I said above. Also what is written is often based on stereotypes as someone mentioned a few weeks back and this can be misleading.

Honestly I have no idea where I fit in.

I also have no idea what I want my therapist to help me with when I see her next week. First appointment with this one. I can't asses what help I need as I don't know exactly what the problem is and what is causing it, whether it is something I can change (learned/psychological) or something I cannot (biological, neurological). Without knowing such how can I know what they can help me with?

What a daft thing for my therapist to ask given the circumstances.

Excuse the typos, in the local library, limited time on pc, need to type quickly then go...

~Also one thing that makes me think not ASD...I don't just think in pictures. I think in whatever mode I need to...words, pictures, musically etc.

I have a strong need to categorize behavior. I think the DSM 5 is fascinating. The psychologist I see seems to dismiss labeling behavior. He has a good point that the brain is too complex to very effectively categorize. Maybe, we should not worry about the categories.

Bumble - Trying to uncover what the problem is can be something to talk to the therapist about. Also, I remember numerous ASD people here saying they don't think in pictures. I don't know, but I had the impression there is so much variety with ASD that there may be no one thing that is necessary diagnosis. But I am up way past my bedtime and I can't trust what I am writing.