Quirks becoming Aspie traits?

Post Reply New Topic

When you found out about Asperger's (particularly if you learned that you were an Aspie as an adult), did you realize over time that a myriad of seemingly innocuous quirks were Aspie traits? It is seriously the weirdest feeling to learn that so many things that I do are typical of folks with Asperger's-- it's surreal.

Toe-walking (my husband has often commented about my shoes only showing wear on the ball of my foot, but I never really thought much of it), being picky about the color of my bowl or the type of metal my silverware is depending on the meal (even though I'm eating it on my couch with a toddler and no one else to watch me), my intense, obscure interests (for a little while now I've been really into Cold War era US military surveillance systems), my GI issues, all of my hand wringing, rocking, hand flapping, and other stims, and even my lack of ability to speak when I am very frightened or overwhelmed.

I always just took them as personality quirks and, I mean, they still are! They may be there because I have Asperger's, but they're still just my personality traits and quirks. But did it feel incredibly odd for you when you started seeing your quirks as almost formulaic?

Yes, I know exactly what you mean. I have been diagnosed as an adult and it is so interesting to look back on my life and see the connections that I hadn't realized were there.

I actually find it extremely comforting. One of my own personality quirks has always been needing to find patterns in things. So being able to see the pattern of my life was quite wonderful. Of course there are still aspects of me that have nothing to do with my Asperger's, but so many puzzle pieces are now fitting together. I had been feeling like my life was a jumbled mess, and now I feel like there is so much clarity.

No, because I think that thinking too much about the fact I have Asperger's and the quirks caused by it only makes it worsen.
But I found out when I was diagnosed at 13, not as an adult.

I was diagnosed as a child but I didn't begin to learn about it until recent years.

I had strange posture growing up and in my teenage years I worked extremely hard to fix it (successful!). I didn't realise until recently that is an autistic trait.

I am more sensitive to spinning than the average person. I used to get strange sensations when diving certain ways into swimming pools. I would tell my friends how awesome it was and for them to do the same, but when they did they felt nothing at all. I now know that I got these sensations due to sensory differences with neurotypicals.

There are a few more but I can;t think of them right now.

I only came to realise I might be on the spectrum when I was trying to figure out my daughter and came across Aspergers. She now has a diagnosis, but I don't yet, although I'm making steps in the right direction. Of course, I had heard of Aspergers and thought I knew what it was, but I really didn't have a clue. If I had a clue, I would have put all these little quirks and nuances together sooner. I didn't know all these things were connected in any way. I just thought I was different or broken, but I never thought to bring all the little odd things together in a list, as they were unconnected as far as I knew.

The things I'm thinking of are things that I might have been picked on for at school, e.g. the way I walk, or things that my friends had even pointed out to me, e.g. why I take so long to put my socks on. I can't drive either, for various reasons, which can all be put down to being on the spectrum, but, when asked, I had no good reason other than not being good with mirrors. I struggled with social aspects of work - the simple things like making a phone call or asking a manager for info on a job I was doing for them. But, I excelled in the things a person in my position was neither paid nor expected to do. I couldn't ever put my finger on what was up and why I couldn't just do my job, like everyone else in the same position as me. But, I also knew I was the one everyone came to for the really difficult stuff, especially in relation to IT (although I've no training in this area), maths or statistics. Social anxiety has been the thing that has curbed my life chances, but I didn't know why I was so anxious to do things that come naturally to others.

I also pick my skin and spent many years chewing my hair.

Makes sense now.

It has been the most amazing thing. In these moments I have never felt more Alive. When I first recognize an Aspie connection it is something like a 13 year old girl would feel finding if she found a member of One Direction standing next to her. OH MY GAAAAAD!! !! ! I am a 56 year old guy. Then there are emotions more deep and intense then I have known. It does not happen as often as it did in the first few weeks after my August diagnoses but your post about finding a pattern was another connection maker.