Hearing but not listening, an Aspie trait?
I have this problem when someone is talking to me:
I'll hear them talking, see there mouth move, assume that they are probably speaking English, but have absolutely NO idea what they're saying. Usually, I just smile and/or nod, hoping that I'm not reacting the wrong way. Otherwise I'll keep repeating "What?" until I understand (rarely), or I'll give up and pretend that I understand.
So is this normal for Aspies (or people in general), or am I just weird...?
I've heard of selective mutism but not selective deafness. Maybe you're the first.
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Could be a central auditory processing disorder. Seems like it's more common in people on the spectrum.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Auditory_p ... g_disorder
I have this problem all the time. Mom has to yell at me before I actually understand, and she gets all exasperated with me because I don't know what she was saying before she had to yell. She expects me to hear her/understand her all the time, and when I don't it makes her mad. She used to be more patient with me, but that was before I was a teenager. She probably thinks I'm just not paying attention (which is normal for teenagers apparently), and it's not because of autism. It really is like I'm from another planet... speaking another language yet!
I'll hear them talking, see there mouth move, assume that they are probably speaking English, but have absolutely NO idea what they're saying. Usually, I just smile and/or nod, hoping that I'm not reacting the wrong way. Otherwise I'll keep repeating "What?" until I understand (rarely), or I'll give up and pretend that I understand.
So is this normal for Aspies (or people in general), or am I just weird...?
I only have this problem during a sensory overload, when there's just too much data coming through my brain's processor for me to sort it all out. I've had it happen to me at work, when trying to deal with one walk-in customer and having several others come in and start interrupting. When everyone's demanding my attention at once, I can't makes sense of what anybody is trying to say.
I have this problem from time to time, typically when I feel depressed or anxious -which can deteriorate into a vicious circle as you might expect.
However, I also rise every now and then, and stay on the right trajectory, where I'm on the ball, and feel upbeat as a result. I try exercising at the gym as often as I can, and find that helps.
It's not so much distraction in a flippant or inappropriate way - it's, as some of you sort of alluded to, trying to separate "the noise from the signal".
For instance, at work when I'm in meeting discussing some problem, I'll engage in tangential thinking about another problem, which may be indirectly related - instead of sticking with the current thread of discussion. But it's not like I'm drifting off thinking about being on a beach in Hawaii, or thinking about the latest best-seller that just came out or what have you.
When I was working that would happen to me when my boss was talking to me about some technical or interpersonal issue.
My mind would first race around a bit trying to take in what he was saying, relating it to what I already know, thinking of my following questions, and so on. Eventually my auditory processing would just freeze-up. I could recognize he was speaking English; I could recognize individual words and short phrases/sentences. But otherwise I could not process what was being said.
It was quite frustrating.
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auntblabby
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Yep! If I am experiencing an overload, the words take on a "Charlie Brown's teacher" quality.
I will try to focus but the words become non-sense sounds. I try to unravel the mystery language by watching their face very carefully to see if I can scavenge any clues.
The whole ordeal makes me feel very angry at myself and my brain because I WANT to know what is being said.
Yes, it's very like Charlie Brown's teacher or listening to someone talking in a foreign language and the babel fish or universal translator is malfunctioning briefly.
I was just thinking about this. It happens to me when I am not expecting someone to talk to me. Like a friend of mine was trying to get my attention and I could see his mouth moving and I could hear sound, but I had no idea what he was saying. I had to get him to repeat himself 3 times before I understood the words and by this point he looke a little irritated, as though I was messing with him deliberately.
A lot of times it happens to me when I'm extremely bored. I find that I get bored extremely quickly if someone starts in on something I care nothing about or don't understand. I either find myself daydreaming--completely "deaf" to everything that they're saying--or I just start staring at their face, which, if obvious, can become very uncomfortable for both me and the other person.
But I can also do it voluntarily now, since I used to zone out so much as a kid. It's kind of nice; like a built-in pair of noise-cancelling headphones. If I really don't want to listen to someone or just want to think about something else without the interruption of their voice, I can almost just mute them. My ears hear them, but to my brain they might as well be mouthing the words.
I'll hear them talking, see there mouth move, assume that they are probably speaking English, but have absolutely NO idea what they're saying. Usually, I just smile and/or nod, hoping that I'm not reacting the wrong way. Otherwise I'll keep repeating "What?" until I understand (rarely), or I'll give up and pretend that I understand.
So is this normal for Aspies (or people in general), or am I just weird...?
I only have this problem during a sensory overload, when there's just too much data coming through my brain's processor for me to sort it all out. I've had it happen to me at work, when trying to deal with one walk-in customer and having several others come in and start interrupting. When everyone's demanding my attention at once, I can't makes sense of what anybody is trying to say.
That´s my problem too. I can listen when it is quiet and there is only one person speaking. But if more noises come into my brain or even if something different takes too much of my attention (not only noises but also things I see or smell) I can´t understand what a person says to me.
To concentrate I sometimes just close my eyes when I listen to someone. But strangers who don´t know why I do it would consider this behaviour as unfriendly or uninterested although it means the opposite: I WANT to understand them and care about what they say but don´t show it with looking at them.
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English is not my native language. So it is possible that there are mistakes in my posts. Please correct me, I´m still learning.
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