"oh yeah your a person!"

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does anyone else think this, talking to another person, somehow do something wrong and think "damnet! i forgot people have feelings!"

i seem to always forget other people have opinions, feelings and morals. and i even forget that theyre human, and that were the same species

i also forget im human, and IM the same species as everyone else, and when people say "well yeah emily, your a person/girl too" it takes me a moment to realize "ohh yeah! i am a girl/person!"

why is that?

yeah this happens to me alot. I also forget that people can change. That the person I just thought of as "bad" or "rude" or "ignorant" etc. can actually end up not being that person as time passes. That just because I've classified them as that doesn't mean that is how they will always be.

But people get upset about things that it does not make sense to get upset about. This makes communicating confusing.

No, my experience is the exact opposite.

I've had people treat me like I'm a non-person or a no-count and that my feelings/opinions/perspectives don't matter.

As such, I try to avoid treating people the same way they often treat me. Even people who would treat me like I'm not a person. I don't want to stoop to their level.

C'mon man, get out of your bubble here.

I don't think that I forget that people have feelings and opinions. Though sometimes forget to verbally acknowledge their feelings and opinions. Maybe a lot, but I've been trying to do it more.

I often have the experience of feeling that other people don't recognize me as human. And that's really awful. Plus, when it happens, I start to doubt whether I'm really human, too.

Nope. I've always known that other people have feelings; the world doesn't revolve around me. I've been very blessed to have friends who are very accepting of me, even after I told them I have Asperger's. They've never seen me as being different from them.

I tend to forget that I am also human.
Sometimes I firmly believe I am from another planet and just learning about humans.

Wait! What?! You mean to tell me all this time those fleshy meatbags are just as squishy in their brainmeats?! How have they been able to create vast empires and sustain their kind for so long with such weak cranial constitution?

Never had this feeling and I hope I never do.

Classmates used to say that to me when I was in school. Like, they'd say "I always thought you were really serious and had no personality, but you're actually really interesting and funny!"

Also, people used to think I was mentally slow, and were amazed to realize I was in the 'gifted' class. It's ironic how my classmates instinctively knew there was something wrong with me, but teachers and parents failed to see that I was autistic, and struggling.

It's the other way around for me.

Yes, this does happen to me from time to time. It was actually only a couple of years ago that I even realised that I was a person with the same amount of rights as everyone else (I don't know what that says about me and my life).

I have also been guilty of treating people as though they have no feelings.

It's hard for me, too, even as an NT. Recognizing the emotions and needs of others isn't something that comes simply, and often comes hand-in-hand with the liability of actually caring what they think.

Humans have a hard cap of only caring about (approximately) a maximum of 50 other specific humans, and we usually reserve those spots for people similar to us. If you find yourself not caring about others, know that that's normal and natural, and that it's a good thing that you're recognizing the inherent limits of your human meat brain, because recognition is the first step towards modifying behaviors.

It's tricky, being a human, and the worst bit is that you have to keep trying.

This ^^^^.

Just because you're autistic doesn't mean you have to go "all in" for the stereotypes. Almost (?) all of us with autism have hearts of gold. We only hurt people because of our mind-blindness. We never do so intentionally. OP, I don't understand your point of view. If you don't see people as people, maybe there is another issue at work, but it's not autism.

No, I don't forget they have feelings, though I cannot always predict what they will take offense to. I do, however, find myself frequently self-editing in my head, even while I'm speaking, catching myself about to say something and thinking "Oh, criminy, if I say that, somebody's going to get all bent out of shape, I'd better rephrase it."




^^Ditto. ^^

Last edited by Willard on 04 Feb 2014, 10:38 pm, edited 2 times in total.

I thought about your question, why does this happen. For me, it is processing demand, sometimes there are too many things to keep up with and I can't hold all the pieces in my head is all. I'm almost always trying hard to make sense and be kind. Not always interpreted as that, but I'm usually trying. At a certain point though, when people get too confusing and I start feeling overwhelmed, or just too much is happening, sometimes holding on to someone else's perspective especially if disguised, gets too hard.

Does that make any sense?