Are you attracted to defiant people?

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I have always been attracted to defiant people, especially ones who defy all of society and think of themselves as the ultimate authority. On the other hand I despise servile pathetic worms who hide behind majority status. When I see someone in the act of defiance I think very highly of them.

I wonder if that is a trait of people with AS or just me.

Sounds like a thin line between thinking for oneself and arrogance if they view the rest as "servile pathetic worms." Ick. No thanks.

I admire people who defy the norm. It shows a strong character. However sometimes people are just defiant for the sake of it and have no integrity or real stand on what they are defying.

I too despise people who keep their mouths shut because they are too scared or too insecure about speaking out.

I admire famous people who are willing to speak up about issues. Such people like Madonna, Matt Damon often speak up about what they see is wrong.

Uh no. I just think they have no respect and don't care about anyone else and I avoid those people.

Granted, morality is important. But I hate it when people hide behind majority status rather than offer justification. It is quite common. Somehow 'majority' becomes synonymous with 'right'.

I guess the best way of saying it is: the best people are defiant but just because one is defiant does not mean one is among the best people. All my heroes are/were defiant

There are still many things wrong with humanity, and not rising in defiance against such dishonour is completely unattractive to me.

I certainly find nonconformists to be more attractive than rigid conformists, but I'm not sure if that's an aspie thing or if it's just because I've always felt "different" so I'm attracted to people who revel in their "differentness."

I don't know if that would be considered the same thing as the OP's "defiant people."

Depends what you call defiant.

When I was a teenager, I had just started at a new school. Initially a group of girls seemed to welcome me into their collective (albeit briefly) until I realised they were bullying another young girl whose parents had just died and they wanted me to join in with them. This young girl was always standing alone in the playground and I felt for her, so one day I went over and said hello and we became friends (albeit briefly). The bullies did not like that I had refused to join in with the bullying and of course directed their attentions at me.

I may have brought that one on myself but I would do the same again as I refuse to bully someone.

A similar thing happened online during my adult life. A group of people were pack attacking a woman on an internet forum board. Their attacks were vicious to say the least and not one person did anything, moderators included. I did not know the lady at this time but went into defend her anyway. We have never met in real life, but every few years she sends me a small package anyway and I send something back to her. She is a very sweet lady and they were absolutely vile towards her. I hate when people gang up and attack a single person...I tend to feel protective towards the person who is unfairly receiving the hard time from them.

Again they of course turned their attentions on me.

The thing is, despite that, I'd still do it again if I saw someone being bullied....

There is that kind of defiant where you go against the grain or the group in order to stand up for your own beliefs, or there is the rebellious defiant.

I admire the former, the latter concerns me depending on how the rebellion takes place and whether or not someone could get hurt!

Personally, I don't care much for social status within a group. Whether or not I want to socialise with someone depends on how much I enjoy their company and whether or not I trust them and feel comfortable around them. Their social status means jack s**t to me and nor do I care to go against my own morals to achieve social status myself.

I see myself as being stubborn rather than rebellious though as I don't really rebel in the traditional sense. I don't have green hair and piercings yet anyway. I tend to go for red or dark brown.

I like people who stand up for what they believe in.

On saying that if I agree with what the group stands for or I am neutral then I will be a very agreeable, congenial person and try to do my best to be helpful.

I don't want status within the group though, I just want to be friendly and perhaps further their cause, especially if it is something I support.

That is really nice of you. I have had similar experiences IRL and online. That is the sort of thing I am talking about. Of course I will not like the Islamic Revolutionaries of Iran despite the fact that they were once rebels. But as I said the best people are always rebellious/defiant. There are some people who always agree with everyone just to avoid disagreements or just to be part of the majority. I hate that. I have had many disagreements with the majority over moral issues. Somehow they felt stronger in a group even though they kept offering the same absurd arguments. I have seen very racist, sexist and homophobic societies and the few who think it is wrong dare not speak up and oppose the majority, allowing some mob of idiots to silence them.

Of course if there is nothing wrong with the majority then there is no reason to be defiant, but there are many things wrong with them. Either way, our morality should guide us not what the majority thinks. If it so happens that our morality is in line with the majority, great. But we are acting that way because we want to not because it is how the majority acts.

I like people who will disagree with me if they think differently rather than people who will agree with me on everything. I cannot trust such people.

When I see someone else stand up against the stupidity of the majority, it is so attractive to me.

If it's not defiance for the sake of defiance, then yes, kind of like what bumble was saying, I think. It's more just complete/very strong independence that I admire, which may seem like defiance sometimes.

Only if they're intelligent lol. Most defiant people however are pretty disruptive and unpleasant though.

Interestingly the sort of defiant people I am friendly with don't come across as defiant from their actions (they are actually mild-mannered and decent people), but inside they have unconventional views.

It is very rare that defiance requires physical action. It is usually a matter of what people say. I am not talking about the idiot who goes around yelling for no reason just to be defiant. I am talking about the person with unconventional views who stands up for her beliefs despite social pressures.

I mainly see people in terms of nice and not nice - likeable and unlikable.
The rest really does not matter to me.

It seems like everyone has their own definition of defiance. Freethinking, having your own opinions, disagreeing is not defiance. Running a red light is defiance or being rude and disrespectful to people and trying to get away with things because they think the rules don't apply or they don't care. They are known as troublemakers and are always in trouble at school and are likely to get in trouble with the law as adults. Then when they are released, they end up doing the same crime again learning to be more careful to not get caught. I have known a few defiant kids in my life and they were not pleasant people and they were always in trouble and they were mean and rude and a bully.

Being new to this board and to interaction with aspies in general, I find it fascinating how we all started parsing the meaning inherent in the word "defiant" in order to clarify our answer. On other boards I've been on, I would have been the only one trying to break the concept down.

How fun!!

Ha. Well, to add my own two cents worth, I have mixed feelings about the word defiant, even though persons of authority representing the System have always used it to describe me (their term was "passive resistance"). I think a common pitfall many defiant people fall into is that they identify so completely as non-conformists, they actually become conformists to the stereotype of the non-conformist. Or they resist everything that isn't considered fringe. IE: "I hate your stupid pop music, because real music doesn't rely on hooks! Music should be edgy and must annoy a minimum of 95% of the population before it can be considered valid!"

That said, I guess I do feel strongly drawn to defiant people if defiant is taken to mean unique individuals who do their own thing, clearly stand out in a crowd and effortlessly lead by example. Steven Tyler and Johnny Depp are two of my biggest heroes, not because either is likely to cure cancer or end world hunger, but because they're both very odd ducks who show us other odd ducks valid ways to go our own way without coming across as creepy or freaky.