I was thinking about how I find it hard to trust people. And the reason is usually not that I think they have bad intentions towards me. It's because I know they don't understand me. A person can have good intentions but if they don't understand how their actions affect me, they might hurt me anyway.
If a person has already hurt me and I think about whether or not I can trust them again...I just want to know if they understand how their actions were hurtful. Sometimes people know they have hurt me but they don't understand how or why so they just do it again.
I am thinking it works the same way, vice versa, if other people feel that I don't understand them, or don't show enough empathy towards them, maybe they don't trust me either.