Describing ASD Autiism Aspergers from our point of view

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In this thread I am trying to get our description of communication difficulties.

The so called professionals like the say people with Autism see the world in a different way.
I think the last sentence is untrue in large part.

My part of the spectrum is what use to be known as Aspergers and I am very aware of my communication difficulties.
People tend to think of Aspies as rude as they mistake our bad communication for rudeness.
I am convinced people with more severe Autism are mistaken for stupid because they are not given the chance to communicate by the so called professionals.

I have had a life of people getting angry with me because they have misunderstood me.
People have been fast to right me off as rude rather then ask me for clarification.

As you can see my poor communication is showing in this very post.

What I am looking for is a short to the point explanation of what communication misunderstandings feel like from the point of view with people with Autism that can explained quickly to NT people.

I am sure we can do better then we see the world in a different way.

You could go with the wrong planet idea or something similar. It feels like you were dropped off in another country without bieng told and were just expecteed to understand thier language and culture

This is what I said to someone recently:

What I'm saying is that if I seem reserved or whatever you find different from others, is because that's how autism works. I'm not able to socialize in whatever way you are used to. That is me being myself. Most people take it the wrong way and think I am brushing them off or being rude or cold and distant or whatever. Not much I can do about that I'm afraid.

I am an adult now I am thinking of how Autism is described in young kids.

I hope they are given more of a voice then all of us got.

I like my humorous approach.

"Okay, wanna know what Autism's like? Imagine Nicolas Cage. Now imagine everyone's Nicolas Cage. You'd have a tough time communicating, because you don't know if he's happy or being threatening- he's waving his arms about and his eyes are bugging, you don't know what it means; and now you've noticed everyone's doing it, making their very presence a grate upon your existence."

If, as I suspect (along with two professionals) I'm on the spectrum, I'd say it's like there's several instruments in the orchestra that I can't hear.

Certain variations in the tune that those instruments are playing are beyond my range of hearing. I hear the basic tune, and can hum it back, but other people are hearing a far richer version of the orchestra, and can repeat back an imitation of the tune that exceeds my ability to reproduce it.

Another way of putting it is that it's like I'm color blind, and am oblivious to the differences between certain colors, colors that to others are obviously VERY different from each other. The difference here is that this "color blindness" involves elements that make up human communication. I can't perceive some of the subtle things that make that up, and so may reply in a way that seems inappropriate or inattentive. It may annoy the people I'm interacting with, but their expecting me to understand and perceive something beyond my brain's ability to deal with is maybe even more annoying, if not hurtful, to me.

how i describe it to adults and people my age:

im just not born with social rules, i had to figure it out on my own, im also sensitive, sounds are louder and lights are brighter, and i cant be around people for too long or i meltdown and become depressed. i get stressed easy so to calm myself down i have a Special Interest and sometimes, i forget that if i talk about it too much i bore people.

how i describe it to children.

show them this video


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s9eATBV-_lg

Well one aspect is being interrupted all the time because it takes you longer to put your thought into words before people move on, then when you can put it into words and attempt to get back in the conversation to do so before it moves on....people are annoyed because you're trying to 'interrupt' when they never let you finish what you were saying in the first place.

Or you think there is a stop in the conversation and go to say something only to realize no one heard you say anything. I also sometimes have people thinking I'm stupid because it might take me longer to put something into words or due to being somewhat oblivious people that aren't jerks just laugh with me when I have an oblivious moment.

The two of you before this post have really explained things perfectly and I can closely relate to the two posts.

The NT way of communicating seems Alien to me.

Here's how I explained it to my best friend, the (aggregated over several months) conversation went something like this:

Me: What I'm trying to tell you, if you'd let me get a word in edgewise, is that my brain is actually wired significantly differently from yours and because of that my perception of the world is significantly different from yours.

Her: That makes no sense, you're saying that our brains are so different, yet we can communicate. We're having this conversation about this right now, and if your brain were really that different from mine we wouldn't be able to do so.

Me: Listen, all I'm saying is that because my brain is different, my perspective is different. Not totally alien, just different. That's why I need you to believe me when I say I'm hypersensistive, because there is a real difference between how much sensory information I'm aware of, and how much you're aware of. It's not huge, but it's enough that everything is just a bit more intense for me.

Her: Now you're saying your senses are superior to mine!? I know that's not true!

Me: No, I'm saying that your brain is simply filtering out slightly more of it from your conscious awareness than mine, not that my senses actually pick up more or work better, just that my perception of the input is more intense, not even that it's more accurate or that I can perceive more because of it, just that it's more intense, and that's why I have trouble with certain sounds & such, and why I'm constantly making all those social faux pas that you keep correcting me on, which I appreciate.

Her: Oh... Well, I'm still not sure if I believe you, but that make some sense I guess, so I'll think about it.

----

Years later she became the first person I know to stop someone else from doing something which (unbeknownst to them) was causing me to bite myself.
Sometimes it takes them a while, and they're not always willing to try to understand, but some allistics do eventually get it, and then they can be our best allies & defenders.