repeat a grade in school. or not?

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Hello. I'm a father of a sweet, talented, creative and imaginative 7 year old boy. He has been diagnosed with ASD since age 3. He has a tutor at home and a helper in school, including various therapy hours during school to help him learn.

He did very well in kindergarten but now the school is saying he is behind in reading and they want him to repeat the first grade. My wife and I just want to make the right decision for him. Was anyone here held back? Pushed forward?

Any advice or thoughts from the community?

Ps I forgot to mention the class he's in now has an incredible group of neurotypical peers that love and support him. They would go on to 2nd grade and he'd lose those connections if he stayed back and repeated 1st.

Thank you.

i know a girl who was struggling. she stayed back and became an "A" student with much increased confidence. one story may not be the same as what happen with your fellow, though.

thank you for responding. what grade did this girl stay back?

I don't think he should repeat a grade. I think it's important that he stays with his friends and the work will probably get way too easy for him if he repeats a grade. When I repeated a grade all the work was way too easy and I eventually fell behind. Now I'm considering dropping out. Don't do this to your child.

@DK thanks that is exactly what I'm afraid of. hang in there.

I would wonder what about the nature of the "learning difficulties"? Could it be a sensory/distraction problem? If so, then holding him back is not going to address the problem. I would wonder if they think he will be successful a second time ?

I am glad I was not held back.

@ LoveNotHate I believe in my heart that it is a sensory / distraction problem. I suppose I have the ability to say "ok hold him back but only if we work to help with the problems (like the one you mentioned).

The do think he will be successful a second time - He can read, just not at the level they want him to.

They wanted me to repeat first grade as well, didn't think I read well enough either. I was best reader in my 2nd grade class and going forward FWIW.

If your kid has good friends and support structure, I'd keep him with his peers for sure.

@jacoby thanks for responding.

yes, my boy shows signs of being able to catch on and accelerate in reading. (IMHO).

the school says he prefers nonfiction over fiction and when they are reading nonfiction, he excels.

my question is: WHY NOT JUST FOCUS ON NON FICTION THEN??

It doesn't sound like it's issue with his ability to read then doesn't it? With me, I don't really even remember struggling with reading in 1st grade; it was mostly pretty short uninteresting childrens books and when I started reading things that actually interested me I did better then most my classmates. I got into Harry Potter in 2nd and 3rd grade, those are pretty long books for a young kid. I've talked to mom about this, she's says just like I flipped a switch and excelled at it.

If he excels when reading nonfiction then he doesn't have a reading problem.
Encourage him to read about what interests him.
Could he get help from his tutor over the summer?

3rd

YES. we are focusing on the summer as a catch up opportunity.

we have a meeting with the school tomorrow and I want to ask that we give him the summer to demonstrate success - on subjects he prefers.

heck i was the same when I was a kid. I'd rather read a car repair manual than another beverly cleary book.

Back on the topic of distractions - at home he has significant stimulatory behaviors...arm flapping, some humming, etc. But what the school tells us is that those things NEVER happen in school.

I'd like to understand this more.

No repeat, unless he is all-around behind, but since he is only behind in reading specifically fiction, then no repeat, repeat bad.

I don't know if this would be of help. I chose to repeat the 9th grade. I technically passed, but I chose to repeat it because I felt like I didn't get adequate knowledge. It's true that I did miss out on the friendships I already made. They were in different classes.

If he is able to read, just not the things THEY want him to read, I don't see their issue. Is it possible that because he is considered autistic he is able to get a bit of different expectations than other children? I mean, I would think school would be more concerned about him being able to read factual information, anyways. If they aren't, they SHOULD be.