Do you use the disabled toilet or the 'normal' toilets?
When out in public (like a shopping centre, museum, cinema etc) do you use the disabled toilet or the 'normal' toilets?
I have to use the disabled toilets because most of the time the 'normal' toilets are packed full of people and it makes me feel very uncomfortable. I also like to have my mum with me and the disabled toilets are big enough for the both of us. The only problem with using the disabled toilets is that because Autism is a mental disorder and thus you can't see it on a person physically, so sometimes I get these strange looks from people (which I learnt were 'dirty' looks, a 'dirty' look is a look someone gives a person when they are annoyed or something like that) because they have to line up whilst I don't. I also suffer from 'dirty' looks from wheelchair users when I am finished and open the door, obviously they must think I'm someone who abused the facilities.
I was at the O2 last weekend with my mum when we decided to go to the restroom before we headed home. The line to the female toilets was massive (about 20 people lined up outside the bathroom door) As usual we lined up outside the disabled toilet and the 'dirty' looks from those people in the queue was horrible. It was so bad I ended up having a meltdown to which almost all of the 'dirty' looks stopped because I guess they realised something was wrong with me (a little too late because the damage had already been done).
So anyway, do you use the disabled toilets or the 'normal' toilets? Or do you just not use them and rather prefer to wait until you're home? (I would but I can't hold it in for too long )
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Diagnosed with Autism, ADHD and OCD in 2008, aged 11.
Your neurodiverse (Autistic) score: 193 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-Autistic) score: 23 of 200
"Different but not less."
Who cares if those half wits give you dirty looks.
You could have a colostomy bag which you needed to change and need that extra room in the stall.
Or any other type of bag.
I don't ever judge which stall people use. There are a zillion reasons someone may need a handicap stall.
I use whatever stall I can grab.
Sorry you felt judged. People are ignorant.
♡♡♡hug♡♡♡
Tawaki
I use either. If the toilets are full, I will use the disabled stall. If I have a bunch of stuff, I will use it, if I have my baby with me, I will use it, same as if I have my son with. Disabled stalls are also for mothers with their small children. Not all places have family restrooms.
I never thought about the handicapped stall being reserved for the handicapped like the parking spaces are. I just thought it was a regular stall that is large to fit a wheelchair person so they can use the toilet too. I never thought about being for other people but I never cared who used it.
_________________
Son: Diagnosed w/anxiety and ADHD. Also academic delayed and ASD lv 1.
Daughter: NT, no diagnoses. Possibly OCD. Is very private about herself.
I never thought about the handicapped stall being reserved for the handicapped like the parking spaces are. I just thought it was a regular stall that is large to fit a wheelchair person so they can use the toilet too. I never thought about being for other people but I never cared who used it.
As far as I'm concerned parents aren't allowed to use it. A lot of places in London (and other places I have visited or visit regularly) usually have one big stall in the women's restroom for parents to bring their children and so that they can fit their buggies in. The disabled toilet is for the disabled. A lot of disabled restrooms require a key that disabled people can request to order. They can take it everywhere with them (my mum has one for me) and it works on all disabled toilets that use that key (which is actually a lot). That stops people who aren't disabled from using it, the only problem is that you can find them on eBay so anyone can buy one if they're willing to pay.
I kind of get annoyed when parents use it (when the other restroom is perfectly empty) since it's for disabled people. Maybe it's because I'm all about following the rules because the idea of breaking the rules just seems... disgustingly defiant. I get just as annoyed when I see a car parked in a disabled spot without a badge. Child or not, you should not be using up space that actual disabled people require.
_________________
Diagnosed with Autism, ADHD and OCD in 2008, aged 11.
Your neurodiverse (Autistic) score: 193 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-Autistic) score: 23 of 200
"Different but not less."
I never thought about the handicapped stall being reserved for the handicapped like the parking spaces are. I just thought it was a regular stall that is large to fit a wheelchair person so they can use the toilet too. I never thought about being for other people but I never cared who used it.
As far as I'm concerned parents aren't allowed to use it. A lot of places in London (and other places I have visited or visit regularly) usually have one big stall in the women's restroom for parents to bring their children and so that they can fit their buggies in. The disabled toilet is for the disabled. A lot of disabled restrooms require a key that disabled people can request to order. They can take it everywhere with them (my mum has one for me) and it works on all disabled toilets that use that key (which is actually a lot). That stops people who aren't disabled from using it, the only problem is that you can find them on eBay so anyone can buy one if they're willing to pay.
I kind of get annoyed when parents use it (when the other restroom is perfectly empty) since it's for disabled people. Maybe it's because I'm all about following the rules because the idea of breaking the rules just seems... disgustingly defiant. I get just as annoyed when I see a car parked in a disabled spot without a badge. Child or not, you should not be using up space that actual disabled people require.
Oh, I am in the USA so it's different here but we also have the handicapped stall debate online from Americans. I have never seen anywhere here about who can use the handicapped stall because as far as I know, anyone is allowed to use it. It's not reserved. My parents built a lake house and were nice to have a large bathroom put in there and have a wide door to accommodate wheelchair users but yet everyone is still allowed to use that toilet. We even have a changing station in the handicapped stall in most places. But family rooms are rare and only Babies R Us has a changing room. I have never seen it anywhere else except those stores.
Your culture is different than ours.
_________________
Son: Diagnosed w/anxiety and ADHD. Also academic delayed and ASD lv 1.
Daughter: NT, no diagnoses. Possibly OCD. Is very private about herself.
While I was fascinated by how many places and how common changing rooms are an family restrooms and handicapped rooms are in your country, I also found it something that playgrounds there are restricted to kid use only and teens and adults are not allowed on the equipment and they have fences around them and they close at night. Here, our playgrounds are not even restricted and don't have fences around them. Anyone is allowed on them. But it does get disturbing what people leave on our playgrounds here.
_________________
Son: Diagnosed w/anxiety and ADHD. Also academic delayed and ASD lv 1.
Daughter: NT, no diagnoses. Possibly OCD. Is very private about herself.
Most new buildings are made with one disabled size stall as default and if there are more then they are normal sized, I think this is public building code. I say keep the line moving and use the next open one, whatever one this is unless of course there is a disabled person waiting in the line. People including myself are often really uncomfortable in the public restrooms so that would likely explain the faces. Keep your head down, watch your feet and take what is available. The great thing about large public places is you will likely never meet these people again in life so don't worry about them.
While we don't have a rule about who can use the handicapped stall, people still hold their personal opinion about it so I don't know how many times I have gone to the restroom and saw a line and no one was using the handicapped stall. I always went in it. Then I have also been in restrooms where other people were using it whenever it opened.
_________________
Son: Diagnosed w/anxiety and ADHD. Also academic delayed and ASD lv 1.
Daughter: NT, no diagnoses. Possibly OCD. Is very private about herself.
CockneyRebel
Veteran
Joined: 17 Jul 2004
Age: 50
Gender: Male
Posts: 117,125
Location: In my little Olympic World of peace and love
I mostly use the 'normal' toilets. However, in some situations I do use the disabled toilets. For example, at the McDonald's that I often go to, the 'normal' toilets are often filthy. So the only choice left for me is to use the disabled toilet because it's usually clean. Also, if the 'normal' toilets are all occupied and the disabled one is free, I have no hesitation to use the disabled one. I've never noticed any dirty look from other people.
I don't think you need to worry about other people's critical look as long as you know you are not doing anything wrong.
mr_bigmouth_502
Veteran
Joined: 12 Dec 2013
Age: 31
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 7,028
Location: Alberta, Canada
I use whatever is available, and looks cleanest. If that just so happens to be a wheelchair accessible "disabled" toilet, I still use it. I've never once been in a situation where I was in a "disabled" stall, and someone in a wheelchair was waiting for me. Obviously, if there was a guy in a wheelchair behind me, and there was a "disabled" stall available, I'd let him take it.
Now, if the normal toilets and "disabled" toilets are in different rooms, then I use the normal ones, unless they're all taken.
ASPartOfMe
Veteran
Joined: 25 Aug 2013
Age: 67
Gender: Male
Posts: 36,372
Location: Long Island, New York
Regular ones. I don't need the extra grab bars etc, let the people who need them use them. Same with seats on buses for the disabled. While it sucks that there is little or no accommodations for my neurological disabilities, it would be an using my Autism as an excuse to use psychical accommodations meant for people with physical disabilities.
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Professionally Identified and joined WP August 26, 2013
DSM 5: Autism Spectrum Disorder, DSM IV: Aspergers Moderate Severity
“My autism is not a superpower. It also isn’t some kind of god-forsaken, endless fountain of suffering inflicted on my family. It’s just part of who I am as a person”. - Sara Luterman
Last edited by ASPartOfMe on 20 Jul 2014, 4:29 am, edited 1 time in total.
I try to use disabled toilets whenever there is one because I am a large person and I can't fit in the regular stalls. I don't care if people have an issue with me using them. I can't use the bathroom if I can't even fit in the door. One of the biggest problems is that the doors open in instead of out. And then the walls are so narrow that even if I manage to get into the stall I don't have room to reach and wipe myself so I kind of have to use the disabled one.
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"I'm bad and that's good. I'll never be good and that's not bad. There's no one I'd rather be than me."
Wreck It Ralph
Same, for the most part (or where I can). I'm fine with using 'normal' bathrooms of either gender if I have to, because at the end of the day if you need to pee you need to pee, but I'll go for anything unisex if I can get it.
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Genderfluid (please use neutral ( they/thempronouns), cognitive and motor dyspraxia, possible inattentive-type adhd, maybe schizotypal, atelophobia.
Not autistic at all, but brainweird in a lot of different ways and, besides, I like it here.
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