Newly diagnosed at 28. Saying hello and asking for advice.

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Hello,

I thought I should register, instead of lurk as a visitor. I've recently been diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome (the letter calls it Asperger Syndrome, which I understand the ICD also labels it). Since childhood I've been a little different, hiding under tables at nursery, avoiding people and generally off in my own dream world. I've been committed, but only to a few subjects I took interest in.

At the age of 11 I started to self-harm. I was instantly put on Depakote, followed by over 13 different medications and diagnosed with everything from Depression to Bipolar Disorder to Borderline Personality Disorder. I've generally not agreed with any of these diagnoses, but never been in a position to question and become conditioned to accept.

Over the last few years I've thought about times Autism has been mentioned, from school to college, although never followed through. I finally decided to save up and pay to see a psychiatrist who specialises in adult Autism, ADHD and OCD. He conducted a lengthy, structured and in-depth appointment as well as asking my mother questions about labour, learning progress and other areas specific to childhood. I was also asked to complete two multiple-choice tests, the AQ and the Cambridge Behaviour Scale. The scores were 45 and seven. He also assessed me on the Adult Asperger Syndrome scale and I met the criteria, including all of the prerequisite domains.

Now I feel I'm stuck, It's been 17 years of being told that I'm severely mentally ill and being pumped full of medications, to learning that I actually have a neuro-developmental disorder and have done since birth. The change has been the biggest adjustment I've had to get used to whilst also answering a lot of questions I previously had no answer to.

I apologise for the long post, I've been following posts on this forum over the years and found them essential for helping me to manage. Now the diagnosis is official I'm hoping someone may be able to offer further words of wisdom and support.

A few areas I did take particular note of include; left-handed/footed, induced labour which still took 19 hours (just before a Caesarean was due to be performed) and I 'came out the wrong way around'. I'm sure none of these matter or have much relevance, but I do find it interesting.

I look forward to replies.

Welcome aboard, you're among friends here.

Getting diagnosed I've heard can be a relief as an adult (I was a pre-teen when I was diagnosed, so I wouldn't know), so maybe you will come to accept that, maybe not. How that plays out is yet to be seen.

Myself (an aspie) and my brother (mild classic autism) were also both 'born backwards', so it is possible that there may be a correlation.

Welcome aboard! I didn't figure out I had Asperger's until I was 23 and didn't get diagnosed until I was 24, but my whole life I knew I was different and this made for a very confusing 23 years. To be honest, life is still confusing, but it's starting to make more sense. I think something that helped me was studying culture and realizing that I live in a society that strives for homogeneity despite the fact that heterogeneity is its greatest strength, and the very basis of psychology is that people should be a certain way. This makes psychology largely subjective, and the truth is that natural selection favors variation in the expression of genes. People are only supposed to be the way they believe they should be. Some of the world's greatest minds have/had Asperger's or ASD, including Albert Einstein, Thomas Jefferson, Leonardo Da Vinci, Isaac Newton, etc. Asperger's is really just extreme genetic variation. There are also the theories of high prenatal exposure to testosterone (is your ring finger significantly longer than your index finger?), and theories relating to a Neanderthal phenotype (this one is fun to think about but the evidence isn't very convincing).

As for being left-handed/left-footed, I think that typically means someone is right-brain dominant or both hemispheres are co-dominant. This is often associated with creativity and artistic ability, but I'm not aware of any correlation with Asperger's. I do think that Asperger's has a very strong genetic component, and I have not heard of a correlation with being born backwards.

My best advice for adapting is to realize that nobody is "supposed" to be a certain way, to exercise, and to read some enlightening books. I'm a huge fan of Siddhartha when it comes to soul-searching. I also think that Tony Attwood's guide to Asperger's is a great resource for understanding the condition.

Welcome home, Piers. I was 56 when I was diagnosed, so I understand the profundity of the shock.

I always thought I was an aspie because benzadrine was legal before I was born and Dad had picked up the habit when he was in WWII (it came in an inhaler was general issue, with two pack of Old Gold cigarettes) I know my dad really went through a bad time when they were outlawed and he had to kick the drug.

Merle

Welcome to WP... feel free to make yourself comfortable. I was diagnosed about a month ago (at age 25) and I just remember the utter shock and denial of the first few days. Then.. it settled in and I am okay with it. I still have not told my fiance and I don't know that I ever will......... I feel like he has known me for four years and knows all about my quirks so why do I need to put a name to it... Esp when the only person he knows with ASD is his first wife's stepson who is lower on the spectrum than I am... and so fiance probably would not believe me anyway. Give it time... sit with it and become comfortable in knowledge.

Welcome!

Welcome to Wrong Planet!

Thank you for taking the time to reply. I saw my regular psychiatrist today and I don't think I've ever seen someone go from friendly to patronising in such a short period of time. Now they want to put be back on medication as, apparently, Asperger's can be helped by it.

Unfortunately my mother was there so had to deal with the breakdown I had afterwards after failing to see their logic. This then led to every car driving past sound like an aeroplane hitting my house, and every flicker of light hitting the wall through my blinds appearing like the sun being present in my living room. Unfortunately the only way I've learnt to cope is self-harm, but safely done, so that's the result.

I think the word I'm looking for is 'frustrated'.

Mr Grumpy said recently that "ASD is no more than a matter of opinion." And so is all of the psychiatric b/s you have been going through since you turned into a teenager. For the last 40+ years psychiatrists have been pushing pills on most everyone who wanders through their doors. It's hard because you wouldn't be there if you didn't have a "problem." And they give you pills... that you pay for, and then have you come back soon to see how those pills are "working." These "doctors" don't cure anything... they manage a stable of hurting folk for MONEY. I hope that you can get them, and their pills out of your life.

Well you seem to mention two things. One is related to communication and inability to get needed healthcare and an upsetting patronizing attitude and unhelpful action from the psychiatrist. For that I would recommend taking classes on topics such as assertiveness and interpersonal communication to see if that would help. There are some free courses or videos available online. I would also recommend changing doctors. I've tried to make it work out with two patronizing, uncaring doctors and it never worked out well for me. If they don't care about you and are not willing to put in effort to help you, they just aren't going to. My communication and social skills were never sufficient to make a difference.

The other problem is a sensory reaction to the frustration. For that I would recommend a sensory diet or sensory integration activities, many of which are described if you do internet searches for sensory integration therapy or sensory processing disorder. Cutting is one way of giving yourself sensory input and exerting control, but hopefully you can find a way that is completely nonharmful or even beneficial, such as yoga, dance, exercise, brushing, listening to or creating music, taking a walk in nature, birdwatching, or doing an activity or hobby.

A third issue might be that, at least in the U.S., psychiatrists are a type of medical doctor who do an additional residency specialized in psychiatry. They may or may not have taken psychology courses. A clinical psychologist, social worker, counselor, or other therapist depending on the individual therapist and your level of trust and comfort with them, may use more noninvasive treatments because that is their background and because they cannot prescribe drugs and perform surgeries. Some doctors are leaders in use of noninvasive treatment, but most are more likely to use medical procedures and drugs because that is their background.