Self Discipline

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People often tell me that I lack self discipline, and that I need to quit making excuses for things. Does anybody else have this problem? I find that when I try to explain my issues to other people, they don't seem to "get" it.

I think they say you are "making excuses" because they really don't take your difficulties seriously. So you are right. They don't get it. I think it's a common problem for us autistic people. People just assume that you are not trying hard enough because you probably look "normal enough".

Some people have criticized me for not driving. Although I explained why I don't drive, they told me I was being stubborn about not driving. So they were completely dismissing my explanation. I don't bother any more. They are too stubborn and are not trying hard enough to understand me.

It's actually extremely hard to make people understand you because they only rely on their own experience and see things from their perspectives. Many people are quite narrow-sighted.

I think I lack self discipline now, I wasn't always like this. In the past i could discipline myself to achieve most goals, but now my brain feels fried and i can?t get it to work like it used to. It is hard for those around me, i was meeting the standards expected of a professional woman and now I?m overwhelmed by organising the housework! It?s not an excuse, but neither is it understood. IRL accurately verbalising my issues has not really happened yet, for others to not actually ?get? it. I?m not explaining this very well, but I hope that makes sense.

Part of the reason I?m experiencing communication difficulties, is that I'm confused, really confused about what I have always considered to be regular for me and the broader definition of regular and the acceptance that my version of regular is not the broadly accepted definition. Until that makes sense to me, I am keeping quiet about it.

I definitely lack self discipline. It's like.. I have no control over my own body or thoughts or wants/ desires. It really sucks because I spend all my money and then fiance gets mad at me because I have to ask for gas money. Is lack of self-discipline an Aspie thing or what?

There are explanations and there are excuses.

Lack of self discipline and procrastination may be aspects of autistic behavior as I find it very common in the population. I have struggled with both myself. What I have found is it is ok to cut yourself some slack, I think we need it more then most. But on the other hand you have to be very careful to not let it be your norm or collapse into it entirely. Acting on things that are important in a timely way is especially important or you will find yourself increasingly behind the curve.

Falling entirely into lack of self discipline and procrastination is pretty much a one way ticket to feeling miserable.

Achieving self discipline is kind of a challenging thing for me, because I don't really know how to do it, and in some ways I kind of don't want to do it. I would like to feel more motivated and actually get things done, but that takes effort, and I'm a lazy sob who doesn't like doing what other people tell me to do. It's like I need self discipline to get self discipline.

A good place to start is with setting a few routines - like setting the alarm clock and getting up every day at the same time.

Take it a step at a time and you'll get there - Rome wasn't built in a day.

Don't try to explain yourself to people who are never going to care.

Yes and also that sounds a lot like the arguments I have with myself. I come up with a reason for not doing something and then I say to myself that it's just excuses and it goes on and on and nothing gets done.

Yeah, like my workaholic aunt not understanding why I don't want to be a workaholic. Stupid A-types

I think what youll find is that most nts actually are the ones that lack self discipline.

True self discipline is rare because it means the ability to resist strong urges.

Nts have better moderating functions in their brain.

So they know exactly how long to spend to get things done, and they have little transitioning from one task to another.


what you need to start with, is realize you have few natural instincts to guide yourself along.

We all tend to stumble through life, because our natural instincts cause us to want to seek out repetition and comfort.

Once you can sport your internal desire for comfort, youll be better at manipulating yourself into actions that are more productive.

It's kind of hard when you have people questioning your behavior, and those very same people are being close-minded about it.