Fear of abandonment, anyone?

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Is it common for people on the autism spectrum to fear abandonment?

I definitely fear abandonment from certain people. For me it's mostly a fear of being abandoned by people who are trying to help me. People like psychologists, adults who have tried to help me when life has been utter crap etc. I'm not afraid of other people (family, boyfriend, friends and so on) abandoning me. Also, I'm not sure if it's the actual abandonment that I fear or if I fear that no one will ever be able to help me. Now, for example, I'm really worried that I'll be abandoned by the psychologists when my assessment is over and that they'll tell me something like "well, that's it, the assessment is done. Now go live your life", without actually giving me any further help. The uncertainty (plus the knowledge of how horribly depressed and anxious I get when I don't get any help) worries me to no end. I feel like I'm quite dependent on the help I get (therapy etc) and I'm not sure if that's a good thing.

Am I the only one afraid of these things? Am I being really silly?

Sounds like its anxiety stemming from you losing your option of having someone familiar with your issues going away. It can be stressful to have to meet a completely new person and tell them very personal things and build a rapport all over again just to get help.

No, not at all. My psychologist is moving away, and I had a REALLY hard time saying goodbye. She tried to assure me that my next psychologist will be nice, but I have a hard time trusting new people. I'm not looking forward to starting all over, with someone new.

Have you asked what will happen, after your assessment? I doubt they will just abandon you.

Yeah, and it feels even more stressful now since the psychologist I've been going to now is the first person I feel have actually understood what I'm trying to say. The previous therapists/psychologists I've met haven't really understood and they've complained because of my problems communicating thoughts and emotions etc. I guess I'm worried I'm going to go from someone who seems to get it to someone who's not going to understand at all. I'm also afraid I won't get any help at all.



Yes, I've asked. The thing is I've been seeing two psychologist for a few months. One who's been assessing me and one who's been trying to help me to learn how to cope with stress (I have a very low tolerance for stress). I've asked them both and the psychologist who's been helping me with stress said that if I get diagnosed with AS, I should get help from the people who've assessed me and if I've got documented depression and/or anxiety they can help me at the place where I've gone for "stress therapy" as well. When I asked the psychologist who's assessed me she said something about us making a treatment plan together but it sounded like she wasn't certain I'd get some sort of individual sessions with a psychologist (which I feel like I really need). It sounded more like I could attend certain lectures/courses that they provide or that I could go to some sort of discussion group together with other people with AS. I'm really not sure though and it's the uncertainty that makes me really freaking worried right now.

For me personally, not at all.

yeah. from everyone, a little bit.
it was especially bad with her when my limerence was at it's peak.

To me, abandonment is just a reality of the world. Everybody abandons everybody. Societal pressure ensures this happens for the sake of survival. It's just something I accept.

The few good people I have in my life I try not to take for granted. It doesn't prevent abandonment entirely but it can help reduce the risk. That's the best I can say about the subject.

Sniff. One of my turtles runs away and hisses when I touch her.

I live by the creed that, every new first encounter with another person carries within it the seeds of goodbye. Every first contact is the start of a farewell.

That's very sad but is so true. I realize that I actually have always been thinking in that way, too, though rather subconsciously. When I meet someone that I get along with, I cannot help wondering how it will end.

I can kinda relate to the OP. When you have someone who understands you more than just superficially and who can guide you, it's very hard to lose that person. After all, most relationships with people are only superficial.