Are you always verbal?

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I saw the thread with the person who needed some help with speech. I was going to post there but I think it would be almost hijacking as it would shift the conversation.

Anyway, are you always verbal? There are times when I do not feel like talking, at all. It's almost tasking for me to talk I really just want to just e quiet. I will moan, grunt, and sometimes hum what I would say. I know exactly what I could say and I could talk, it's just that talking is just something I don't want to do, even though it would get me through the conversation much faster. This usually happens with my parents and friends (since I see them the most).

I never heard much about Asperger's (though ASD now) in relation with being non-verbal.

Usually now, not under stress, and not when I was younger.

There isn't such a clear distinction between Aspergers and autism. You can have difficulty being verbal and be diagnosed with Aspergers. The diagnosis is the opinion of an expert looking at a person in a particular moment, and people change over time anyway.

i always try and be verbal but when im in shut down mode my language skills are useless, i still try and talk though,

That might have been me as I get speech therapy. But yeah I communicate a lot through sounds too. Asperger's I don't think usually effects speech. It's people with classic autism like me where speech is an issue. I didn't say a single word until I was around 7 years old. But some aspies I know have selective mutism.

I was thinking about this the other day, how there are times when speaking just seems like too much work and all I want is to be silent. Social expectations however dictate that I must speak, even when I don't want to. Sometimes in the early mornings, speech presents a multi-sensory problem, but the minute I encounter another person, uncomfortable as it is, I have to speak to them, as this is the social expectation. I wish there were a way for me to cut down on my speaking and just have people accept me as extremely quiet. Ironically, verbal ability is my strongest trait.

Being verbal but not wanting to speak or finding it tasking to speak sometimes is not like being non-verbal.
Selective mutism is also not like being non-verbal.

Can anyone legitimately choose when to be verbal or non-verbal? I figure you either are or you are not, right? I mean even if you choose not to talk you can still receive and send communication even if indirectly.

Not for me, completely. Was repeating phrases past age 3 (classic autism)

No. In some situations, I can't speak at all and have to sign or write what I want to say instead. It's almost as if I forget how to use my vocal chords and/or my thoughts are so scrambled and muddled, or just blank that I don't know what to say. I don't feel nervous when I can't speak though. More frustrated and annoyed at being unable to speak.

I'm very verbal. When I used to have rage outbursts I was very verbal. When I was a toddler I had typical toddler tantrums every now and then, like most toddlers. I still had tantrums like a toddler right up until I was about 12, not out in public, just at home. I don't know if that was to do with Asperger's or not.

i need to be really careful with words.

So far. When I was young I would sometimes have difficulty communicating when I was in trouble. I could talk. But I couldn't gather my ideas. I still can't express my self clearly under pressure.

I use to hate being told to explain myself or be asked" what were you thinking". Being confronted like that caused me to shut down and all I could say was "I don't know."

My mom says that as a kid I almost never spoke, and that often I seemed frustrated because I couldn't communicate what I wanted to. I don't think I quite met the speech milestones, as I only said a few words or the same words until I was 3. After that I was sort of able to communicate, I could use some sentences according to my mom, but I still rarely talked. She uses the word "never" so I must not have been talking very much. I could repeat words or sentences sometimes. When I had meltdowns I couldn't talk and explain, during or afterwards, what the problem was. My mom said I would just stare blankly at something and not respond, or I'd just get angry.

I still have trouble with it, if I am in shut down I will usually have very short responses for people, sometimes not in the form of words if I can help it, like a short nod for yes and similar gestures. I also have trouble gathering my thoughts and conveying them verbally, and it is even harder to communicate when I am frustrated, especially when I am being peppered with questions. In those cases I always end up looking stupid because I am forced to answer, and often what I end up saying isn't an accurate portrayal of my thoughts.

What Halfmadgenius said about being asked "what were you thinking" I also relate to very much. I remember one specific time, I was in an interview with my church bishop and he asked me that exact question, my mind just freaked out and I really didn't know what to say, so I said "I don't know." He basically said there's no way I didn't know what I was thinking, even though I really didn't, so I was very confused and I ended up sitting there silently for about a minute thinking about it. I still didn't know what to say so I just made something up because he wouldn't let me avoid the question.

I am always verbal. However, even if I am "present" with people and talking, that doesn't mean that I can always get my thoughts and words to coordinate.

For example, the other day my husband asked me if the milk had been taken out of the freezer (we have goats.) I didn't know, so I asked my son, "Did you take the music out of the refrigerator?" The problem was that I was working on some music before I was talking to my husband, and my mind had not completely made the switch to another topic.

I have trouble finding words quickly. I will lose track of what I am saying in the middle of a sentence if I am interrupted in any way. Sometimes, I can't think of the right word. For example, I have said in the past, "I need one of those things that you write with that has ink in it" because I couldn't think of the word "pen."

I am almost always willing to talk to people unless I am dealing with overstimulation and need to get away from everyone. But in that case, it's not an issue of being nonverbal. Sometimes, I want to talk to people, but anxiety stops me. I think that is different, too.

But, I have problems communicating verbally and people need to understand that and be patient. I will say ridiculous things, make up words, get sayings wrong, have trouble getting out what I want to say, lose my thoughts, etc. I usually do OK when I am teaching because what I have to say is somewhat memorized and it is about a topic I am an expert in. But even then, I will sometimes do things like ask a question of the students but say the answer instead.