My mother babies me >_>

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I don't know why though. I am 21 and I think I'm pretty high functioning, but she wants to go with me to my college counciling appointments and won't let me put my feet in the ocean at the beach without my brother! (There's more examples by this is all Ican think of at the moment). I know how to swim and am a fairly strong swimmer, I am the oldest child and even though my 18 yr old bro is significantly stronger than me and a life guard, this has been going on since he was 16 and I think its unnecessary. I grew up learning about the ocean. I know how to handle myself, but she insists I not be much further than arms reach from my brother...I don't know if she's just being waaay too protective or if she knows something I don't...but its frustrating.

My mom does this same. She always has to be with me like some sort of hawk. She's afraid that something is going to happen, and I might have one of my severe meltdowns. D: I keep telling her I can do things on my own without her following me. The only time she ever lets me wander a bit is on my own is in the vendor hall at my anime convention. Today though, she almost wanted me to wait for her and my dad to go to Party City, but my dad was like "She can go by herself," and it shut her up. I was able to go into Party City all on my own for a little while.

I know how you feel though. I'm 25, and even though I am very childish, I get treated like a child as well. It can be annoying, but for me it's sometimes a good thing because that's the only way I'll ever learn from anything.

The thing is, parents usually see things that we don't see. Mine often tell me I'm like Temple Grandin for example, but I don't see it because Temple is more autistic than I am. I don't really see my autism as much as they see it. They're only doing what they think is best for me without trying to make it worse for me. I think maybe that's how your mom feels. She thinks she's protecting you from things since she might see you in a different way than you see yourself.

They call them Helicopter Parents. I like it personally, having my mum on site to tell me when to do something helps me comfort and I may stim when in her presence. Ice bucket challenge I did for instance, I said "say when" and she said "when" which obviously is a massive help in this confusing age of confusion and evil.

my mom is like this too

As a parent being protective enough and giving enough freedom is always a hard balance. And I know that when your child has any additional need there is a natural feeling of extra protectiveness that you have that you have to fight to an extent.
Without knowing you I've no idea if your mum's fears are sensible ones or not. Is it that she doesn't trust you or that she is nervous around water generally and only trusts your son due to him being a lifeguard?
How does your brother feel? Does he think your mum is being overprotective? If he does maybe he could help convince our mum to give you a bit more freedom? And when you show her you can manage that it may lead to a bit more freedom in other areas.
I'm sure your mum has your best interests at heart though even if it might be misguided sometimes.

You are an adult, so it's your decision to make, not hers. That said, it's a good idea to never go into the water alone whether you're autistic or NT, but as I said, it's your call.

I'm not sure my mom knows i'm autistic though. But she doesn't treat my brother that way. She doesn't baby my younger brother.

Good god, I pretty much could not live if I had my mom with me all the time....lol she did seem rather over-protective of me as a child and sometimes still gets all concerned about me going anywhere at night and what not even though I know how to use the public transit and have a phone so I can always call someone if there is a problem. It would be kind of hard to get together with friends or potential relationship interest if my mom or another family member was always around. I do hang out with my brother a lot though so I think sometimes she worries less when she knows he'll be with me and he's younger. Also I he told me sometimes he makes a point to spend time with me since he knows about some times I've been suicidal so he has some concern but its not like that is the only reason we like simular music and activities so we're pretty much like friends.....a crap load of people i meet though don't have or want anything to do with their siblings.

In truth she probably still wants to be over-protective of me but she knows it will just make me angry if she tries and rightfully so, it is my life...and even when I am having problems she really isn't even the best person to help, kinda unstable herself it seems like. Either way I do try to let her know if i am going somewhere and give an estimate of when I will be back and remind her she can call me on my cell phone if she wants to. There are negative experiences I might have not had if I had overly-protective family always with me but then there are lots of positive ones I would have missed out on as well(my mom would likely not approve of many of my more pleasant experiences) though.

My mom never bothered to check on my emotional well-being or ask me how I was doing; but she definitely knew how to try to control and baby me. I basically left home without knowing any life-skills and she kept calling me every day when I was at college and giving by hour-by-hour instructions on how I should be studying.

I found her behavior so annoying that I bought a one-way ticket out of my home country and started a new life on a different continent. I just had to get away from her.