Can I return to work and work consistently?

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I was approved for SSDI, but I was just denied continuation of short-term disability benefits because the disability was not supported (which I'm appealing). The psychological person for the long-term disability (separate from short-term disability) called me today and asked me some questions. She asked me my symptoms, I told her that I had problems with being emotionally unhinged and obsessive which interfered with my ability to work consistently. I had tried to return to leave once, but it didn't work out because I couldn't work consistently, so I went back on leave.

She then asked what I do on a day-to-day basis. I tell her that I often do the same things over and over again, reading the same things over and over again, running the occasional errand. I told her about my lack of confidence that I can return to work consistently and that my days would be dominated by feelings of anxiety and impatience. I told her I liked to sleep in the middle of the day, because that was like going in a time machine forward, which helped the feeling of impatience.

Do you know what she told me after I told her all this?

She said, "So you try to keep yourself busy, then?" Without thinking I affirmed her statement, without even understanding the meaning--I do this a lot. (My dad gets onto me for affirming automatically and then denying once I realized what he told me was not true. It makes conversation difficult, let's just say.) But I knew I could deny after understanding the meaning. But then I though about it. I do try to keep myself busy, even if it's with the same things over and over. I rarely will just lie in bed, not doing anything, unless I'm sure I can sleep.

Then this made me wonder, since I try to keep myself busy, can I go back to work and hit the ground running? Am I getting better? I don't recall becoming emotionally unhinged recently, though I've still been obsessive. My psychiatrist is doing an aggressive titration of Prozac. He has me on 60 mg/day right now, and might up it to 80 mg/day if I show no change by next week.

If I return to work, then that could resolve the problem of my financial hardship from being denied short-term disability benefits (as my first SSDI payment isn't until the middle of next month). But I'm worried that I may not be able to do it consistently, which could get me fired for real as I have no FMLA left. There's the issue of returning to work, running into the same problems again, which result from my work's health insurance not covering sex reassignment surgery, and then getting fired, and then trying to get back on SSDI. The SSDI award was important and is not something that I'd give up until I'm darn sure I can work consistently again.

What does it sound like to y'all?

SSI/SSDI is hard to get. It was hard for my dad until he got an appeal saying he couldn't go back (he has physical and other non-aspie challenges that affect him from working). The ones who don't need it get it the easiest, and the ones that do are the ones that get denied... which is really stupid. Just because you keep yourself busy doesn't mean you can work. I mean, that's stupid that they think that. I am constantly keeping myself busy as well... and I can't work at all. That's why I have SSI right now.If you really think you are unable to work, consider getting a lawyer to appeal your case.

"Keeping yourself busy" is doing things you WANT to do, at the TIME you want to do it, as many times as you want to do it, etc. Work is something you HAVE to do, in the time someone ELSE wants you to do it, AT the time somebody else wants you to do it, in the MANNER someone else wants you to do it, etc. BIG DIFFRENCE!! ! So, no, I don't think liking to keep yourself busy is the same as being able to return to work!!

You have to watch these SSDI / SSI people, they'll construe anything you say to their favor, and their favor is NOT to pay you!! ! (I know you said you've already been approved, I'm just sayin'....) The problem is, like someone else said, the people who don't really need it, have gotten it by skirting "the system" / abusing it, and now those who DO, truly need it, are getting abused, somewhat, by these people who have to make the decisions to dole-out the benefit.

you can earn $1070 per month in 2014 (it will go up a little in 2015) and still get SSDI. will your work take you back part time? or could you find some other part time work? can you borrow enough to get by until your SSDI kicks in?

i think it's five years you can work and still get back on SSDI payments immediately if your disability keeps you from working. you still have to get approved again, but you get payments while you wait for the decision.

Also, look into how to get a "Ticket to Work". It gives you 10 months, I think it is, to "test the waters" without having to re-apply. I've got one and I've never been able to work for 10 months, so I've never had to re-apply.

If you think you might be able to work, keep it under 80 hours a month and only about $700 a month until you know you can take care of yourself financially full time. If you go above $1040 even one time, you are off the program. In 2 years you will be eligible for medicare. After receiving medicare, if you are able to get off ssdi, you are STILL eligible for medicare for 5 or 6 years. [very important] Also, in most states, being disbled will shorten your wit time for any section 8 housing if you are eligible. In section 8 housing,you look for the place you would like to live and then you ask the landlord if they accept section 8.

Even though the cutoff is $1040 a month, if you earn over 700 something a month for either 9 or 6 months [ I forget which] in a 5 year period, you will hve to prove that you are incable of working full time.

On SSDI, you have no asset limit, and you are allowed investments giving passive income without that income counting against you. For those on SSI, the rules are TOTALLY different.

I'll consider.

Last night, I kept myself busy. I've been playing Final Fantasy VI, and last night at around 9 PM or so started playing it, the scene just after your first visit to Zozo and just before you go to the opera house. I was enraptured, even doing several battles for level and magic gaining. I played straight through to when the gate to the Phantom Beasts' World opens and the Phantom Beasts attack the Empire. Then, with anticipation, I could not wait to see the game's climax, which comes about halfway through the game. I thought it was very cool the way at Thamasa, the Empire's peace delegation is there, the Returners' peace delegation is there, and the Phantom Beasts' peace delegation is there, and it seemed like all conflicts had been resolved when suddenly you hear a familiar laugh and it's all downhill from there. I thoroughly enjoyed the game's climax that shortly followed. I kept playing through to when you save that boy in Tzen from the house collapsing and recruit Mash (Sabin). When I stopped, I realized it was 7 AM in the morning and I finally went to bed, waking up at about 4:30 PM.

The anxiety and the impatience are back.