I took the big test with a psychologist 3 weeks ago. Went back tonight and he gave me a review of the assessment with his conclusions:
1. Autism Spectrum Disorder
2. Generalized Anxiety Disorder, with good insight
3. Persistent Depressive Disorder (dysthymia), severe
I feel relieved. Satisfied, and maybe somewhat vindicated. I always knew that I was different from most of the people around me, but I didn't know how, and I never met anyone who could help me find out.
Now I have. I'm comfortable with this psychologist; he's very accommodating, always seeking my input. He's not like the one I had before--she was all pushy encouragement and plastic optimism. When I brought the idea up with her she dismissed it out of hand: "I don't think you're autistic, [Evil Chuck]." As if there were something really wrong with being that way and I wasn't unconsciously stimming right in front of her.
But now here I am, with a diagnosis and some introductory information about vocational rehab, one more thing I definitely need. I go back to the same doctor next week to begin my therapy. I can finally see a way forward here.
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RAADS-R SCORE:
163.0FUNNY DEATH METAL LYRICS OF THE WEEK: 'DEMON'S WIND' BY VADER
Clammy frog descends
Demon's wind, the stars answer your desire
Join the undead, that's the place you'll never leave
You wanna die...
but death cannot do us apart...