Desire for children?

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How do you all feel about reproducing and having children? Have you always wanted to have kids? Do you prefer to interact with family member's children, but not have any of your own?

I have never in all my life ever wanted to have a child. The very thought is terrifying and overwhelms me- me.. in charge of a very small person, and having to raise them to be a good citizen of the world? The thought is overwhelming. Plus, I have never ever felt connected to a small child before. It's like children are from a world that I am not- we do not speak the same language. I am a very logical, consistent person-- a child is not that at all. I like having my young niece over (2 months old) but that is the only child I have ever felt connected with. Am I the only one?

Planning to have children is an entirely selfish thing (not judging as it's only natural, just saying) followed by a lifetime of general selflessness in order to be a "successful" parent. I do not believe I'd be able to commit to a minimum of 18 years to ensure the well-being of a child as I'm quite a self-centered person. Also, I really only like children 6 and younger. After their cute wears off and they start maturing with their own opinions on things and such, I lose interest for one reason or another and stop being able to connect with them. At one point a few years ago I would dream of children one day in a fantasy world where I wasn't who I actually am, but at this point I think I'd be better off not having any for my own and my hypothetical potential child's sake.

I have strong desire for children because I'm extremely curious as to what they would look like and how they would turn out.

In reality, I won't have them, not only because I am gay, but because I wouldn't be able to cope with taking care of them.

Nope.. no kids for me, ever. The planet is overpopulated and I'm not going to contribute.

Aside from that; I can't support kids financially, I'm a boy in a man's body and I'm not that satisfied with the world at this day and age that I feel fine to put another life on there to grow up... yeah, that's about it. Oh, and I would suspect that I would need a partner who wants kids as well; seeing as no one is present, nope, not gonna happen. For any smartasses; yeah I could adopt, rofl... no thanks.

To quote a dutch stand-up comedian (Theo Maassen): "I think children are more of a really persistent STD"

No not really, but one of the main reasons is I do not think I could take care of one. If I decided to be an idiot and over-indulge in alcohol or become suicidal and put them at risk of being left with that. And it's difficult enough for me to take care of myself let alone a child, also keeping any kind of sanity is a chore already.

Had a dream once where I met a woman with two daughters. It was like I fell into their puzzle as the missing piece. I clicked with the woman and the daughters approved of me. The dream felt so real. I could imagine being part of their family. The thought was blissful. Then of course I woke up...

Sadly, in real life, I fail at far too many things to be either a husband or a father.

I wouldn't mind having a child, I don't mind children. I just have no desire to have the child. Like if the child just appeared, that's fine by me, but I wouldn't want to go through the whole process of making the child etc.

I really want children. I love them.

I would probably rather adopt than conceive though because I figure there are lots of children around already who need good homes. However my partner feels uncomfortable with the idea of adoption for whatever reason so we are planning to conceive them instead I guess. Although not for at least another few years as it wouldn't be practical at the moment.

No kids for me, I'm not mature enough or rich enough.

Also, I strongly believe that people today who have kids or who decide to have them are selfish and only doing it to satisfy their own little ego. Because lets face it, the world we live in is s**t, we are 7 billion people, the planet can't produce enough resources for everyone, they are less and less jobs, and a kid who is born today will live in a world of hell, he will work for little money if he has the chance to have job even with a college degree, he will live less well than his parents, will live in a world where pollution and global warming is going to be the main issue. That kid once an adult will be 35 and live in a tiny studio apartment, sleep in a futon, and live off of instant Ramen or be cooking some crap process food when he has the chance to have food. And I can think of a million other examples of why having a kid is bad.
And those parents who think it won't happen to their kids, their kid will be the exception, they will have a great life and have big plans for them, are just wrong, they don't realize their kid is not a bar of gold that will have a perfect life, that kid will just be like everyone else living in a world of s**ts. Period. So having a kid is selfish and pure cruelty to the kid. Only exceptions if if the parents a millionaires or billionaires, then money can assure them a great life, without even working, but then that kid will be a spoiled brat not aware of the reality of the world we are living in.

I don't want kids. I do not have that maternal need thing. I am quite happy having access to the kids of friends and family and choosing when I get to see them and when I don't have to. I do enjoy naming them though.

I have three children, I love it so much! I had a desire to have them and man they are so dang awesome. They are my favorite people on the planet. Two of them are autistic.

Last edited by LoveforLoki on 19 Nov 2014, 4:14 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I'm exactly the same way.

I don't think people have children to satisfy their egos. I have friends who have kids and they really love them and wanted them and were completely devastated when they miscarried the first one. Ten years later they still mourn and miss that child even though they have two more. It's definitely not an ego thing with the people I know who have kids.

My mom wanted to have me so she'd have someone who loved her no matter what.

I can't afford children, time and money wise. So I won't have them.

Further, the thought of being woken by a screaming baby, having to drive kids to social activities, having other kids constantly in my house. Frankly it's a terrifying thought.

That is so awesome. Even though I don't want kids for myself I love seeing families that really adore and take great care of their kids. Here in the city I see so many kids whose parents don't have time or real interest for them. It makes me sad to see that so when I read your post it made me smile. I actually love kids and think they are wonderful. I just don't want any of my own.