Overempathizing

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I usually don't feel much empathy, but sometimes I really, really overempathize. Like if I see one of those horrible news articles that are just putting the spotlight on someone who got a horrifying injury or a rare disease, or, when I was a kid, the losing characters in a movie or children's story. Does anyone else overempathize?

To elaborate on what I mean by overempathizing: When I overempathized this past year or so, I had a hard time not thinking about a person's suffering, their family's suffering, etc. when I only read about them in an article, and could only really stop it by distracting myself with the internet or thinking about my special interest. I cried a lot. I felt absolutely crushed by what happened, and when I talked about it to other people they didn't care or thought it was horrible but still didn't seem to care much or think about it much. Nobody understood why I was so distraught about someone I never met. Even though I've stopped crying and stopped feeling very much after months for one case and weeks for others, certain things will remind me of the people I overempathized with and I'll start feeling sad and anxious again, but to a lesser degree. Sometimes I feel embarrassed that people can feel crushed by something bad happening to a loved one, but I can feel crushed for months because of a clickbait/morbid curiosity article... I guess those articles technically "haunt" me, too. It seems so silly in comparison to other peoples' experiences.

When I was a kid I would usually just go into a crying fit that caused a scene and my parents or a teacher would try to calm me down. It didn't last as long, but other kids (except for in one instance my non-aspie identical twin. Not sure whether that instance counts.) didn't seem to join in.

I knew that this behavior wasn't NT before I learned about Aspergers, but after I read this blog post https://seventhvoice.wordpress.com/2013 ... -too-much/ I thought it might be part of some peoples' experiences with Aspergers.

I do this so much!

It's especially bad when it comes to pictures of people. In high school we had a project in Theater where we had to cut out face parts in magazines to organize in something. I started bawling and wasn't able to do it, I ended up convincing the teacher to let me draw face parts for it. I couldn't stand the idea of cutting up a picture of someone, it made me feel like I was hurting them. I'm getting a little upset even remembering that, haha.

Watching movies and reading books can be hard for me if something bad happens. I read a lot of historical nonfiction, and it's hard to go through because I can't convince myself that the stuff didn't really happen (which is what I try to do with everything else).

I do a lot of denying when I see or read something disturbing, whether it's real or not. I tell myself "they're faking" or "it's not a real situation" even when it is, because it makes it easier for me to handle. I don't tell anyone else this and I keep it to myself, but it helps a little.

I can't even choose mean or rude options in video games. It makes me feel terrible when I forget to tip people in Pokemon Y because I press the A button too fast during text prompts.

It really sucks sometimes. I wonder if anyone else has different coping mechanisms?

I started not reading the news from online news sites more. I sometimes read newspapers, but I mostly read what my friends share on their Facebook, or I see the current events articles on Know Your Meme. Sometimes really bad things slip through in humor sites, or on the trending bar in Facebook. Try not to look at the trending bar.

I don't really have as many problems with fiction. I had a few episodes when I was younger but it's not really a problem now. I sometimes get really upset over history, though, even though I'm interested in it. It's kind of weird for me because sometimes I don't feel emotion over an event, but then I switch over to being upset (and then I want to talk with NTs about my obscure interests in an emotional way, which is bad), and then I switch back to not feeling much.

I like to listen to music to distract me. Maybe you could try music if fiction is too upsetting for you?

I forgot to mention it in my last reply, but I also feel bad if I do something wrong in video games. I reload if I accidentally kill somebody, or if I fail to protect a non-enemy NPC, and stuff like that. I felt bad if I didn't tip people in Pokemon, too. In Skyrim I did part of the Thieves Guild quest line, but I felt bad about some of the things I had to do in it. I should have felt bad about all of it I guess. (Elder Scrolls theology is strange. Logically, there's no right in wrong in that universe, so I tend to feel less bad when I play Skyrim. I still try not to do bad things, though.) Sometimes I'll join an evil organization in games because pretty much everyone else that plays the game does and I know I'll get over the feeling it I do it often enough, but I don't think I find it as fun.