Don't Wanna Grow Up Anymore

Post Reply New Topic

I remember when I was in my teens and starting to change into an adult, I didn't want to grow up. I rebelled against wanting to be a grown-up. I don't know why. I was always very mature as a kid. Far more mature than the other kids I knew.

I don't even know why I'm posting this. This is one of my most intimate of intimates but what the hell. I've bared everything else about me on this Site so there you go.

Did anyone else have issues with growing into an adult?

LOL...I had issues with being a kid; I couldn't wait to be an adult.

On my 8th birthday, I told my mother: "In 5 more years, I will be a teenager." That was also my last "birthday party." After that I enjoyed having a birthday (I still do--it's coming up on January 2nd)--but I rarely had a "party" for me after that.

I hated all those rules, and the way I was treated, and all the bullying, etc.

Once I became an adult, things got better for me.

I never got bullied so maybe that's why.

I never had a Birthday Party. I never had enough friends to actually have a party but besides that, I never wanted one.

I just recently exited the not wanting to grow up stage. It lasted from about 17 to 20. From 13 to 17 I was hollow so I can't really call it maturity, just pretending and going through the motions. But before my dark age I think I did harbor genuine maturity.

From 17-20 I kind of stopped caring about succeeding in school or having a job. I was more concerned with salvaging what little childhood I had left. I felt robbed and inadequate to move on.

Now I'm not sure what I want to do with my life, but I am ready to grow up. I dunno if I'll ever meet someone or have kids, but I do know that I'm not afraid anymore.

I only had 1 "real friend" as a kid. I just wasn't the type to have friends. I enjoyed playing sports with other kids--but all I was interested in was my own results (which were often dismal LOL).

When I had a birthday party, I don't recall there being other kids there, actually. Maybe there were--but I only recall my own self there, and my mother.

Yes, what we're talking about here is "change". That is the progressive deconstruction of one self in favor of a different self. It represents the death of one thing caused by the invasion of another thing.

We are taught that we will become "better" people if we:
think a certain way
dress a certain way
acquire certain items
gain in perceived hierarchal status
suppress our true feelings and project other ones
reserve our concern for things that can benefit us individually
enforce these rules upon other people
etc...


In my theory, we become more contaminated by the thoughts of others as we grow older.
We become less of ourselves, and more an agent of a much larger system intelligence (the hive mind).

If you feel (sense) the invasive nature of this, then it would make sense to reject it, and avoid environments where the hive mind has the most leverage.

I find that people often think growing up means you become a certain way, and then when you get to a certain age, you stay that way. However, I think growing up means that you grow as a person due to life experience. As a result, I get bothered when people say I should start being a certain way in order to grow up when I have learned that the certain way they are pushing on me doesn't work for me. Besides, what someone says is not a substitute for life experience.

I didn't grow up. I have enjoyed the same things my entire life, and never saw any reason to be anything other than what I am.

That's the hive mind at work.

I completely understand. I don't want to grow up either. As a kid, I was very mature and grown up, but once I actually had adult responsibilities put on me, I became childish. I wouldn't wear make up till 8th grade (most girls in my school began in 5th) and didn't wear a bra till 7th (5th was normal) because I knew those were "grown up" things.

Now, I still don't know how to drive (19, USA) and was forced to have a job when I turned 18 when most of my peers were working at 16.

I don't know why, but thinking about being an adult weirds me out. I hate it, can't stand it and I still act like a 5 year old most of the time.

I've never completely grown up. I enjoy a lot of the things that I have since I was little. I enjoy buying myself Hot Wheels and if I see an abandoned Teddy bear or doll I take it home, put it in a pillow case and wash and dry it. I put it on my bed after I take it out of the pillow case in the dryer. I have a Lady and The Tramp piggy bank that's a replica of Lady that I found in a little blue recycling box one Thursday morning. I also collect and play with die-cast Routemasters as well. I also enjoy doing kids crafts. I also get more excited about Christmas than my 5 year old niece, every year in December.

I know it's a bummer that they don't have Kinks bobbleheads.

I don't think Ray Davies would have liked the commercialization, though.

Does it feel like you're being pressured to become part of the matrix?

I'm 19 and I'm not ready to be an adult yet....

These days, it almost seems like 25 is the new 21.

Was that in reference to my previous post?