my therapist told me i am too intelligent for humans.. uh Wt

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so today, in therapy i was just trying to explain something and she said that i am:
- removed/intellectual/distant/theoretical/philosophical/
- when i speak about myself - it is like i am describing someone else, it's like talking about myself as another person when trying to explain how I feel/what I deal with
- she had more of a concept of what I'm going through/could not feel what i was feeling
- said that i am "too smart"/"intelligent" for human interaction and which is why i don't have a lot of friends....

what the hell does this mean? my entire LIFE revolves around creating art to transcend how i feel and make others feel it too but yet she's telling me it comes off a complete opposite way rather than what I have intended? Especially in basic conversation. The most annoying part of this is I AM NOT TRYING TO SOUND A SPECIFIC WAY, IT IS NOT A CONSCIOUS decision. It's how my brain works and I am not trying to change it but it's hurtful cause I am not someone to call myself "Smart" or "special", in fact I do the exact opposite.... This sucks .

I think people are inherently bad at understanding unfamiliar experiences (and neurology) and that's a cultural motif that they grab on to for lack of knowing what else to do if you have no cognitive impairment. I've been around some very smart people and the vast majority of them interact with others with no unusual difficulty. IMHO, I wouldn't take that characterization to be too meaningful/useful.

Was this therapist a LBSW by chance? One of the social workers who took more courses and became therapists? No offense to social workers and not to say they aren't intelligent because everybody is different and I'm sure there are some who are very intelligent and some who were lucky to pass their tests, but saying that somebody is "too smart" is usually an observation that is made by somebody who could never be considered "too smart" by anybody.

In other words, don't worry about it because while she may have been trying to tell you that you aren't coming across very well or very personably to others, she didn't do a very good job of it if she use "too smart" in there.

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I'm giving it another shot. We will see.
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It's hard because I think she is smart and I wasn't offended by her comment. I guess just a bit disorientated by it, maybe as an aspie im more smart than I see myself as and I gotta respect that instead of beat myself over not being neurotypical. It's interesting because she's a good therapist and has helped me a lot and is teaching me a lot, she didn't mean to be offensive -she just had a hard time understanding how I speak and I guess that hit home cause IT made sense why people stop being my friend cause I'm so in depth

Then if she is a good therapist and you like her and are having good results with her, ask her to explain what she means and give you some examples. Then get her to help you find ways to say things differently and help you learn ways to make yourself remember to do that when you are talking to other people. Thats always the hard part about changing how you come across and what you just automatically say. It's easy to remember to do it when you are talking to someone about it, and fairly easy to do when you remember to do it when you are talking to someone you are comfortable with, but very difficult to remember to do it when you are in a situation where you really need to do it. That's what I always had trouble with, remembering to change how I come across when I needed to do it. I found that the best way for me is to start reminding myself before I'm in the situation. Like before I leave home, and on the way there, etc. If I can put myself in another "mode" before I get there, it's much easier.

I think NT's can easily and automatically switch into other "modes" without thinking, where we may have trouble doing so. Most people have work mode, school mode, dealing with authority mode, dealing with service people and store or restaurant employee mode, and different modes for different social settings and levels of intimacy with people, and just slip into them naturally. I believe we have to put some effort into that, and it's why some people think we come across strange. We may just naturally talk to our boss or a judge or cop or the cashier at the grocery store in the same style and level of information as we would talk to a friend or relative and that's not good. Or we might just get nervous and clam up completely and say very little and even fail to say what we need to say and thats not good either. Maybe she's talking about this kind of thing. Maybe you come across more academically than you want to, and thats what she means. I don't know, thats why I think you need to ask her.

I once had a social worker say to me "They tell me you're very smart" and shortly after that was when I found out she wasn't lol. I'm always slightly suspicious when someone other than a teacher or someone I'm working for says something like that to me.

_________________
I'm giving it another shot. We will see.
My forum is still there and everyone is welcome to come join as well. There is a private women only subforum there if anyone is interested. Also, there is no CAPTCHA.

The link to the forum is http://www.rightplanet.proboards.com

Hey Campboy,

You sound like a good guy. You're not "too smart" for anybody.

At least you're on the right track. Please remember: even most "neurotypicals" sometimes are "weird." Just take advantage of your abilities and seek to lessen your "weaknesses."

LOL...I hope you didn't take it the wrong way.

I meant....that the social worker might not be able to comprehend what you say because it's esoteric to her. They are ideas which might be beyond his/her experience.

Not that you could never be "too smart."