should i have my daughter diagnosed??

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LeAnn71
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11 Mar 2015, 9:44 am

My daughter is 7, and she has slight signs of autism or aspergers. She's been in special ed for 2 years, but has been transferred to a "normal" 1st grade class, with a little special attention. Her IEP (individual education plan) is running out, and the school is urging me to have her officially diagnosed, so they can continue to give her "special attention" when needed, which is not a lot. Her problem is difficulty in sitting still or completeting tests without disturbing the class, and they have to move her to a one-on-one room.

I am just wondering if I should have her "officially" diagnosed by a pediatrician, as I'm concerned if this will negatively impact her adult life? Is it something that will be visible to future employers or medical fields?
She has improved SO MUCH since she was 2-3 years old. I have seen her overcome many obstacles/fears. She is "almost" normal. I just don't want to ruin her future, with something that may follow her forever, which she may very possibly overcome in a few years time anyway.

I welcome any thoughts or views on this! She DOES need the extra help, this year. But next year? WHo knows....



kraftiekortie
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11 Mar 2015, 9:48 am

If they'll pay for it, why not go for the official diagnosis?

You haven't mentioned any specific "signs" that she might have autism; you mentioned some that indicate ADHD.

It wouldn't matter, though--I wouldn't think. ANY official diagnosis would give her a better chance to receive services as optimal to her development as possible.



LeAnn71
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11 Mar 2015, 10:04 am

Thanks, I'm just wondering if there will be harm to her future if she is "officially" diagnosed? I don't want a negative diagnosis to come back and haunt her one day.

Her specific signs are dwindling... Noise phobias were horrible. Light sensitivity. Did not want eye contact from people she didnt know or was uncomfortable with. Didn't speak until after 3 years old. I have helped her and respected her fears, and gradually she has worked herself past them. Well... she "tolerates" things much better :-)

I really do not want her on the ADHD drugs either... yes, she is restless at times. At times. Other times she's content to read a book for 2 hours straight. She is very smart logically/spacially, and is reading 5th grade material, in first grade! I'm very proud of how far she has come. Her social skills are lacking of course... But I understand and enjoy her company!

So... I'm afraid if she's "diagnosed", it will give them the greenlight to put her on meds. And again, I'm just wary of the label following her around the rest of her life, which could turn out to be as normal as anyone. I DO however, think she needs the extra help in school, right now.
Will the label follow her?
Can they "make me" put her on meds if diagnosed?



kraftiekortie
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11 Mar 2015, 10:06 am

Man...she sounds like me when I was a kid!

I didn't talk until I was 5 1/2 years old. I was reading at about the 6th grade level in 2nd grade. I don't remember much from when I was frankly autistic (i.e., before age 5 1/2). I had sensory issues, though, as a child--and some slight ones as an adult.

I would really make a great effort to keep her in "general ed" with accommodations, rather than in "special ed."

By the way: I'm only writing what's below this because I don't want you to think there's necessarily a poor prognosis if she happens to be diagnosed with an ASD.

I graduated from high school on time. I've been working since age 18. I got my present job at age 19. I'm 54 now. I moved out from my mother's place at age 20. I graduated college at 45. I learned to drive at 37.



Adamantium
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11 Mar 2015, 2:56 pm

LeAnn71 wrote:
Thanks, I'm just wondering if there will be harm to her future if she is "officially" diagnosed? I don't want a negative diagnosis to come back and haunt her one day.

I think you mean a positive diagnosis, i.e., she has an autism spectrum disorder, right?
I don't think this is negative in any sense and I don't think her future prospective employers will have access to her medical records. This should not be a concern. (Unless we end up living in Gattaca, but then we'll all have bigger problems!)

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I DO however, think she needs the extra help in school, right now.
Excellent reason to get assessed.
Quote:
Will the label follow her?
No.Not unless she needs it to.
Quote:
Can they "make me" put her on meds if diagnosed?
No.



Adamantium
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11 Mar 2015, 2:58 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
I graduated college at 45. I learned to drive at 37.

Awesome. :D



pcuser
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11 Mar 2015, 4:21 pm

I didn't get diagnosed until 61 years old and I wish I had known this decades ago. I think my life would have been better had I known. I also think everybody has a right to know... Also, you don't have to take drugs if you believe it's not appropriate...



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11 Mar 2015, 5:00 pm

Your daughter sounds a lot like me in many ways when I was a kid. I learned to adapt & appear "normal". Girls on the spectrum tend to be good at this. However, please understand that if she is on the spectrum it takes her much more energy & stress to make these adaptations than a neurotypical child. An official diagnosis can only open more doors to assist her with her needs; no one can force you to give her meds.

I only wish I had had my diagnosis much earlier.


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Waterfalls
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11 Mar 2015, 5:58 pm

It sounds like it could benefit her to have a diagnosis that helps the school justify services. Unless she has a learning disability or other specific disability, that is. Does she have a speech language delay still? If so they could use that classification. If not, then in order to offer support she would probably need to be classified I would think as other health impaired or autism spectrum disorder.

You could ask if they could use speech language impaired because of pragmatic language delays. The thing is, it really is better when people know what's going on. People who are great don't need that, but a lot of teachers are just better if they aren't confused, and it's so easy for them to assume won't when a child only seems capable of getting something social and moving on.

There are some bad teachers but they're not going to be better or worse because of a diagnosis. Your child will be in a mainstream classroom it sounds like, so the diagnosis could help protect her against being misunderstood. As well as help you access social skills supports for her that may help her more in the long run.

A diagnosis isn't something she needs to tell people as she gets older. Trying to avoid a label is easily misinterpreted by literal minded people on the spectrum as being ashamed of us. Many of us experience considerable pressure to appear normal as having to pretend and even to be ashamed of our differences, it's hard to resist and not feel ashamed when one experiences words literally, and I think a strong sense of family acceptance could help her as she tries to balance being effective in the world with being herself.



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12 Mar 2015, 3:02 pm

LeAnn71 wrote:
Will the label follow her?
Can they "make me" put her on meds if diagnosed?


The only situation where I've heard of people being required to disclose a disability even if they don't need accommodations is in the military. Otherwise, she'd only need to tell a future teacher or employer if she needs some sort of accommodation.

They can't force you to put her on meds. I mean, it's tough to get a court order even to force a child to receive chemotherapy if they have cancer and parents refused treatment - there's no way it would ever fly for them to force a parent to give psych meds to a child with ASD or ADHD.



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12 Mar 2015, 3:18 pm

Like the others say: So many misunderstandings can be avoided and your daughter can be understood so much better...and she gets a chance to understand herself as well. Very important for a good life.


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ZombieBrideXD
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12 Mar 2015, 6:19 pm

a diagnoses is a tool for getting support when you need it, so yes, if your daughter needs help, get her it, because i hate to break it to you, she will never be 'normal' and it may not get better.


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