Learning to Drive, Would Apreciate Advice

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For years, I have been putting off learning how to drive because I was afraid to get behind the wheel. Just recently I have started taking lessons. I find it an overwhelming, exhausting experience that leaves me extremely tense and I think a lot of these issues may be linked to my Asperger's Syndrome to some extent.

If there are any experienced drivers here that could give me tips to make driving easier, their advice would be greatly appreciated. Thank you for taking the time to read my request.

Do you feel motivated to drive? Is there any particular reason why you must drive? I know, in most parts of the "developed world," the ability to drive could be said to be quite essential.

I would say, if you do learn to drive and get your license, that you've taken a really big step towards independence.

I didn't get my driver's license until I was 37 years old. I live in a place, New York City, where driving is really optional, owing to the decent public transportation system.

I would say: take it slow. Practice, first, in malls (with somebody with you). Then practice on residential streets. Make sure you look ALL WAYS at a stop sign. Try to make sure, even if you're on a major road, and you have the "right-of-way" to give a glance at every interaction, without actually stopping or slowing down.

Always have a license driver near you--otherwise, you'll be charged with driving without a license, and your insurance will go through the roof.

I wouldn't try going on the highway until your instructor tells you you're ready.

Come to think of it: you must know the "right-of-way" rules, Usually, drivers on a major road has the "right-of-way" over people on more minor roads.

Yes, I have recently become motivated to drive because, I have just graduated from college in Conservation Biology and most of the jobs that I am interested in within that field require driving skills. On top of that, because I currently live out in the country, it is in my best interest to learn how to drive so that I don’t have to depend on other peoples schedules if I want to get any job. I honestly probably should have learned sooner, but, up until now, my fears associated with being behind the wheel outweighed the benefits I saw from learning to drive.

I have been to New York City on several occasions to visit my Grandmother, so I know what you are talking about with driving being optional there. From what I've seen, it looks like a hectic place for skilled drivers, too.

I am currently taking lessons and the driver takes me through residential streets, such as the one you mentioned as a possible second step for locations during the learning process. I have a tendency to take too long to figure out what action I need to take on the road. After driving for half an hour or so in these areas, I will start making careless mistakes. My instructor and I both agree that I still have some work to do here and am definitely not ready for any highways yet.

Thanks for your advice.

If you're in the UK, it will be somewhat tougher to learn to drive because:

1. They drive the opposite way.

2. Most of the cars there have manual transmission (stick-shift).

3. The roads (in cities) tend to be quite curvy and narrow.

If you're in Canada, it's exactly like the United States--with one exception: One has to always put on one's lights if one needs to use windshield wipers.

If you're in most other countries in Europe, people drive the "same way" as us--but the nature of drivers and driving is something you have to get adjusted to. You also have to learn the traffic laws for the specific country. Some countries, for example, require that you carry a "hazard triangle," a "jump starter," and "flares" in case of an emergency; whereas the US doesn't have that requirement.

I live in the US. I am actually in upstate New York, in the Lake George area.

When I said out in the country, I meant away from any towns or cities. Sorry if I made that unclear.

That doesn't make sense, kraftie! If you are in the UK (or Barbados, or Japan) the "opposite way" is the normal way and it's not hard.

Also:


Also true in various US States including New Jersey (not that people necessarily obey this part of the code.)

Is this because you get bored and let your mind wander, or it's just hard to sustain focus on driving? Or something else?

She's a US resident who is "out of the country."

Adamantium:
I have trouble because I can’t sustain the level of focus I need. In fact, once this starts to happen, if I don’t pull the car over, my driving gets worse.

Kraftiekortie:
I think I have miscommunicated with you somewhere. I am not out of the country. I said I was out in the country, meaning countryside, away from town. Sorry for the confusion

It's my fault for not reading carefully, actually!

I love the Lake George area! I've been there a few times. It's the Gateway to the Adirondacks!

I stayed in Long Lake a couple of times. I've also stayed near Lake George itself.

When it comes to driving on mountain roads, away from places like Lake George Village and Warrensburg, I would use more caution than usual--especially at the beginning. Otherwise, it's really pretty easy to drive on main roads in rural-suburban areas.

As for focus: you have to have an EXCELLENT amount of focus when you drive.

I can focus, at least for a half hour or so (hopefully the length of time I can focus will increase with practice). One of my major problems comes into play as I try to take in everything that is going on around me, take in the pieces of the scene, bring them together, try to assess what is important and come to a decision. By the time I've done all that and come to that decision, my resulting reaction time to my environment is much slower than it should be.

You can be as slow as you want in most places in the Lake George area.

You gain speed in processing as you gain experience in driving. It's better to be slow and correctly process the situation than to be fast and incorrectly process the situation (leading to an accident).

Sometimes, I take a little too long for my wife's satisfaction to change lanes on the highway. I have to acknowledge the existence of the "blind spot" before I make the lane change. If I didn't acknowledge this, I would have been in some accidents. I've had times when I forgot the existence of the "blind spot," and almost got in an accident.

All in all, all inexperienced drivers take a little longer to make decisions than experienced drivers. It's better to be honked at and not get into an accident, than to be listen to the honkers and get into an accident because of a wrong decision.

Thanks. It's nice to know that there's no problem with my long decision time.

There will be times, especially at the beginning, when you will be honked at for being slow. This is especially true in populated areas.

But, like I said, your processing time will increase once you gain experience.

I'll keep that in mind in the future. It will take away some of the stress I feel about how slowly I make my decisions when I drive.

Right now, the most important thing is to obtain a driving instructor who is PATIENT.

Make sure, also, that he/she has the ability to brake as well as you (the driver).

Also: when you take the road test, don't drive to the test site. Your instructor has to drive you. If you drive, you fail automatically. Wait for the instructor or the tester to direct you into the driver's seat.

Last edited by kraftiekortie on 13 Mar 2015, 5:51 pm, edited 1 time in total.

My instructor does have a brake of her own.

Thanks for the tip about not driving to my Driving Test.