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kamiyu910
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13 May 2015, 4:50 pm

Have any of you found that you say one thing when you really mean another? I'm trying to understand my 4 yr old son better and since I know that he means one thing when he says the opposite, it does help, but it's still frustrating, especially if I get it wrong because it can lead to a meltdown.
Such as when I ask him if he wants a drink, he'll say no, and if I reply with "ok, I won't get you a drink." He'll freak out and say he wants a drink. Whenever I tell him he needs to tell me what he wants the first time, he acts like he never said no to begin with. He does have a diagnosis of high functioning, like me, and has issues communicating.

Do any of you do this and how do you work around it, or do you?


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Eloa
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13 May 2015, 5:02 pm

I have it the other way around, I say "yes" many times but that does not mean that I mean "yes", it does mean that I realized that someone is taking to me or asked something but not the context.
I do not now what to say so I say "yes".
And it can mean "yes" or "no", but I do not know at that time.
So maybe your son does not really process that fast and says "no" but meaning he did not process what you have said but that he realized that you have talked to him.


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kamiyu910
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14 May 2015, 5:03 pm

Do you have any ideas on how to get him to realize what I'm saying, if that is the case for him? I've tried asking him a few times, making sure that's what he wants, but as soon as I move to action, he freaks out and says he wants the opposite.


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Eloa
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14 May 2015, 5:29 pm

I am sorry, I cannot tell you.
I am 41 years old and I still have problems processing verbal/ communicational interaction, by that I mean hearing but not profoundly processing and realizing what someone has said, but I lack, I guess, mental flexibility to put it into context for myself.
But I have not been diagnosed at young age as well, meaning I had no intervention, but maybe other people here can give you advice.


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dianthus
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15 May 2015, 10:45 am

kamiyu910 wrote:
Do you have any ideas on how to get him to realize what I'm saying, if that is the case for him? I've tried asking him a few times, making sure that's what he wants, but as soon as I move to action, he freaks out and says he wants the opposite.


The way you describe this, I'm thinking he doesn't really understand until you move to action and somehow illustrate physically what you are talking about. Can you try doing that first - without just asking a yes/no question - somehow demonstrate the question visually or physically?



kamiyu910
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15 May 2015, 12:18 pm

dianthus wrote:
The way you describe this, I'm thinking he doesn't really understand until you move to action and somehow illustrate physically what you are talking about. Can you try doing that first - without just asking a yes/no question - somehow demonstrate the question visually or physically?


That could help, I'll have to try it, thanks.
I get so locked into my mindset sometimes when frustrated I need outside viewpoints...


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Your Aspie score: 171 of 200
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