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starfox
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13 Jun 2015, 4:56 am

I have a half sister who I live with who is 8. She always greets me if we pass in the house says good morning and stuff, she gives loads of eye contact and if I don't look at her back or ask her how she is and things back she says 'why are you mad?'. I'm not mad though I just want to get on with things, I don't want to chat all the time.

She always wants to talk and if I'm chatting to my mum my sister butts into the conversation when it's nothing to do with her. She always wants to play with other children and is incapable of being by herself for even 10 minutes. It's such a contrast to me. Another contrast though is that she has been found of have learning difficulties and she has trouble at school but I was always pretty good intellectualy.

I think we're like opposites. I don't like how an 8 year old knows how to be with people more than I do though, I practise all the time. :|


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HighLlama
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13 Jun 2015, 5:23 am

That sounds very frustrating. Growing up, I went through similar experiences with my mom and step-family. They are all very chatty and don't really have serious hobbies. It's annoying feeling like you're always being distracted from your thoughts or desired focus, especially with people who don't understand. At least your half-sister is young and, while it might get annoying, she probably worries about you being mad because she cares about you. She just doesn't understand why your expressions look the way they do.

As for the social skills, don't be too hard on yourself. My brother is much better at that than I am, but he's also very narcissistic and thinks no one is his equal. He charms a lot of people and they don't realize that he doesn't really care. I used to be jealous of how easy it was for him, but now that I see how empty his relationships are, I don't care. Better to struggle with good intentions than be successful as someone I'm not. Also, good people will try to get to know you and appreciate you for who you are. You may not meet them as often as you'd like, but they are out there.



jimmyboy76453
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13 Jun 2015, 5:29 am

I can relate. I have a neurotypical younger sister, also. She's five years younger than me and 27 now. The rest of my siblings are older and had moved away from home by the time I was 15, so she and I spent a lot of time alone at home together. We get along really well, and there are a lot of ways in which we're alike, but there are vast differences between us. It always amazed me how she would talk to so many people. Strangers. People of all ages, races, backgrounds. They just seemed to gravitate toward her. She could stand in line at the grocery store and make friends with the person in front of her and behind her by the time she had checked out. I mostly remain anonymous; no one ever remembers me, and that's how I like it.
She had hundreds of friends, she still talks to most of them. I don't keep in contact with anyone from high school, and none of them were my friends. At best, they let me hang out in their group, which was basically exactly what I wanted.
She and I had some arguments and misunderstandings like most siblings do, and there was a period where we barely got along at all. But once she figured me out a little bit, we got along great and now she's one of my favorite people. The difference came, I think, when she realized I wasn't like other people and I didn't like the same things. I didn't communicate in the same way, and I didn't have the same priorities as the other people she knew. When she learned what was important to me and how I do communicate, she communicated back in the same way; she learned my language and remains one of the only people ever to really talk to me, to hear me and to listen.


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